Ramsey Security (Ramsey Security #1-3)(54)

Exhaling roughly, I struggle not to say something that'll piss off Minka as much as she's pissing me off.

"You dated me," I finally mutter. "I must have some decent qualities."

"Are you fishing for compliments?"

"Not from you, no. I'll wait until Darla wakes up and then quiz her."

Minka frowns. "I can do it. I mean, you have plenty of great qualities. You're tall, and you tan nicely. You're not bald, and your dick is nicely proportioned with your balls."

Laughing, I throw a ketchup packet at her that Minka easily smacks away.

"You're a good man, Troy. In fact, I warned Darla not to hurt you."

I think of Darla under me earlier in bed. Her eyes were so bright and beautiful as if she hadn't a care in the entire f*cking world. Locke never crossed her mind while we moved together. Her heart and mind were right there with me the entire time.

Until Darla, I required little comfort in my life to be whole. Now I really only need her. Not for right now or a few weeks. My chest hurts whenever I think of losing her. If she outgrew me, I'd f*cking die. Or would I turn into a psycho like Locke and keep an unwilling woman?





39


~~~

Troy

Instincts

Darla awakes from her nap and walks around in a dream state the rest of the evening. Even though she's willing to have sex, I only want to hold her. The pills make her spacey, and I don't know what she's really agreeing to when she says yes.

My mind racing with thoughts of Darla and Locke, I'm up until four in the morning. I consider how he scouted her on the cruise. I can't imagine him on the ship, so he must have people searching for replacement Roses.

Or had he picked Darla out of a swimsuit catalog? Did he see her in a boat show ad? Had he grabbed her from the cruise because he knew the authorities would waste time searching the ship and local area, not realizing she'd been spirited away to one of Locke's properties?

I try to imagine Locke's thought process, but he's a weak, rich freak. He's also likely mentally f*cked. There's no understanding a man like him. I can only track and kill him.

Sleeping finally, I never hear Darla get up from the bed. She's long gone when I wake up and caress the cold side of the bed. In the living room, she and a sleepy Minka discuss the age-old question of whether dogs or cats make better pets.

"Troy doesn't like cats," Minka says, clearly knowing I'm awake and listening nearby.

Darla doesn't answer, and I sense she's bothered by Minka's comment.

"Cats make for crap protection," I mutter, pouring coffee. "Cats make better pets for lazy owners like me."

Darla twists on the couch to see me. I don't know what she's thinking, and I hate how I can't read her. She's digging into my every pore until I can't breathe without thinking of her. Yet she remains a mystery to me.

"If the lazy bum is finally ready to do his job, I'm heading home to catch a few hours of rest," Minka says, standing up and stretching. "I'll be back early this afternoon. I have a few things I want to bring over, so I'll need your muscles later to haul the crap from the car."

"Crap?" I ask, too grumpy to pretend otherwise.

"Security crap."

Minka gives Darla a smile before disappearing into the extra bedroom. She checks the monitors, grabs her keys, and leaves the apartment. I remain silent even after Minka is gone.

"Are you okay?" Darla asks, walking into the kitchen.

Her expression bothers me. Everything bothers me suddenly, and I know why now. I am falling in love with this woman, but I don't know what she's feeling or thinking.

"This isn't a job anymore," I say. "It hasn't been since the moment I saw you. I tried to stay focused on the assignment, but you're you. I can't see anything else."

"I know," she says, smiling easily.

"No, you don't. You know how to be close. You have Shelley and her kids. I only have Minka. With her, I always knew she might leave me. Maybe she'd get sick of working together or she'd find a man. I always expected to be alone, and I was okay with being alone. I can't do that now."

Darla blinks a few times, and I know she's nervous. She needs me to be strong so she can be strong. Right now, though, I don't feel strong. I feel like a scared f*cking kid.

"When Locke is dead, and the job is over, I'm not done with us. I don't plan to walk away. You understand that, right?"

"Yes."

"Just yes?" I ask, thinking about how we fell together so easily. Of course, we did. Darla needs to feel safe, and I give her that feeling. She needs someone. How soon until she'll want someone who fits her life better? She could find a boring guy like Vernon with no sexy best friend or blood on his hands. Darla will say she's sorry and thank me for helping her when she was down. Then she'll walk away and never look back.

Darla shuffles away from me. "I don't know what you want me to say."

"Have you ever been in love? Do you know what it feels like for the other person not to feel the same way?"

Eyes darting everywhere as if searching for an escape, Darla balls her hands into fists.

"I don't know why you're saying these things."

"I dreamed of my mom last night for the first time in probably a decade. I'm not stupid. I know why I'm thinking of her. She was selfish and left me. I'm worried you're going to leave me too."