Ramsey Security (Ramsey Security #1-3)(52)
"You've always been lazy, so that's nothing new. You're not weak, though."
"Lazy, huh?" I mutter, pretending to be angry as I regain control over my tears again. As soon as I think I'm calm, my panic resurfaces. "What if Troy doesn't fit into our lives here in Houston? What if he wants to leave or doesn't like you or Vern?"
"Why wouldn't he like me?" Shelley balks.
"I don't know, but what if he does? Or what if he dumps me? What if he gets hurt or killed?"
"Stop thinking."
"I try, but then I see so many ugly possibilities. I almost wish I could pop a pill and forget about everything for a while."
"Then take a pill."
Saying nothing, I think of Troy's disappointment if I give into the darkness. Will he understand I'm tired from days of pushing myself? Or will he think the sex shoved me over the edge? I fear showing him how weak I feel. Yet the darkness offers comfort I desperately crave.
"If he's a good man, he'll understand."
"And if he doesn't understand?"
"Then you'll have an answer to some of those questions you're worrying about."
"Okay, but if he dumps me, you'll need to ditch your family and take care of me tonight."
"Deal."
Shelley and I share our farewells with lots of happy talk about our futures once Locke is dead. After hanging up, I wash my face and look for Troy.
Standing in the kitchen with Minka, he looks imposing... scary even. The irritation on his face tarnishes his boyish good looks. I assume they didn't find the smoking gun leading to Locke's current location.
"What?" he asks too roughly.
I flinch instinctively while Minka frowns at him.
"His people skills are tragic."
Troy grunts at Minka, who waves off his irritation. She walks away, disappearing into the second bedroom. Troy studies me for almost a minute before the anger in his expression disappears.
"Bad news?" I ask when he finally wraps me in his arms.
"No, just slow news. I want Locke dead yesterday."
"It'll be okay."
"I know but f*ck."
When I lean my cheek against his chest, his racing heart betrays his calm exterior.
"I'm feeling weird today," I mumble. "Good and bad and overwhelmed. I'm taking a tranquilizer tonight if that's okay?"
Troy hears the hesitancy in my voice and his body tenses. "Weird, huh?"
"Overstimulated."
Troy surprises me by laughing. "Is that code for the naughtiness taking place earlier?"
"Naughtiness?" I mutter, frowning up at him.
"The incredible f*cking, I mean."
"Oh yeah that, it was great. Now I'm feeling overwhelmed. You f*cked me silly apparently."
"I like that," he murmurs, kissing me softly at first.
The kiss deepens and deepens until I'm utter mush in his strong arms. Barely able to stand by the time his tongue gives my lips a final lick, I shudder at how he owns me completely.
38
~~~
Troy
Neither Option
Darla takes a Valium and rests on the couch. She stares blankly for twenty minutes before her eyes close. I walk to her side and skim my fingers over her soft hair. She looks peaceful curled up under the blanket. I wonder if she'll dream of Locke or me. Preferably, she'll dream of me killing Locke.
In the extra bedroom, Minka sits with her long legs up on the table. She's digging into what smells like a meatball sub. Based on the splat of red sauce on her Go-Go's tee, she's eating the second half of the sandwich.
"Is your little angel sleeping?" Minka says with her mouth full.
Sitting across from her, I smirk, "Don't be a jealous hag."
Minka gives me a weird look and sets down her sandwich. I watch her wipe her mouth and take a drink. Through it all, she's still giving me the strange look. With anyone else, I might pull my gun, but this is Minka.
"You're not totally wrong," she says in a quiet tone.
"About what?"
"I am jealous of Darla."
"Why is that exactly?"
Minka runs her hands awkwardly through her nearly black hair. "I want you back."
"Fuck off," I say, rolling my eyes.
"I'm not playing. I think I made a mistake by ending things."
Studying her, I try to spot the lie in her dark eyes. She's a master deceiver, though. If Minka's messing with me, I can't see it.
"Oh, really," I say, planning to test her. "What do you miss the most?"
"The tenderness."
I frown darkly. "The what?"
"The way we sat quietly together sometimes. I remember how you'd brush away hair from my face."
"What about how you never loved me and being friends who f*ck wasn't enough for you?"
Minka sighs, leaning back in her chair. "I thought we weren't in love, but I get jealous when I see you with Darla. I've never been jealous in my life. I think I f*cked up ending what we had."
I still can't tell if Minka is conning me. She's that damn good. Either way, I know my answer.