Never Standing Still (The Never Duet #1)(23)



“I know, bud. But we have to make sure they fit or else we’ll just have to come back another day to return them.”

He heaved out a sigh and plopped himself down on the bench in the dressing room. “Fine,” he snapped. I chose not to reprimand him about his tone. I could deal with quietly angry Marcus, but didn’t want to poke the bear.

I went in search of pants and when I returned I found his dressing room empty. I backed up, trying to remember if I had the right room, and checked the adjacent rooms just to be sure.

“Marcus?” I called out, but heard no response. “Marcus?” I yelled a little louder. Still nothing. My eyes darted all over the dressing rooms, looking for him, listening for any sign of anyone, but they were empty. I walked quickly out to the sales floor, my eyes making broad sweeps, looking for a tall head over everything else. “Marcus!” I called out.

“Can I help you with something, ma’am?”

I turned to see a sales associate with a polite smile on her face.

“I can’t find my little brother. I went to get a bigger size and when I came back he was gone.”

“Okay, what was he wearing?”

“Uh,” I said, closing my eyes, trying to remember. “A blue shirt with white stripes and a pair of blue jeans with white sneakers. He’s, like, six feet tall.”

“Oh,” the woman said with surprise. “I’m sorry, I just assumed he was a child, you looked so upset.”

“I am upset. He’s seventeen, but he’s got the mind of a seven year old.” I’d said those words so many times, but they never made me less sad, never failed to remind me of what had happened to him.

“Okay, don’t worry. We’ll help you find him,” she responded, taking only a moment to digest what I’d told her. She took a walkie-talkie out of a holster at her hip and then started talking rapidly into it, giving his description, making sure to let everyone know he was a “special needs teenager.”

My eyes kept darting around the store and I walked up and down aisles, looking for Marcus. The sales associate was still with me and I heard chatter over the walkie, other employees calling out that areas of the store were clear. Then, I heard a man’s voice over the walkie say that there was a kid answering to the name Marcus in the electronics department.

I turned on a dime and started toward the giant sign overhead that said Electronics and looked down every aisle until I saw Marcus standing in front of a video game console, fingers tapping quickly on the buttons of a controller. I sighed when I saw him and smiled at the man with a name badge that read Tim standing with him, talking him through the video game.

“Marcus, where have you been? I went back to the dressing room and couldn’t find you. You scared me to death.”

Marcus’ eyes didn’t leave the screen, but he responded to me. “I got bored. But then I found this video game to play.”

I turned to Tim, saying, “Thank you. I should have assumed he would come here.”

“No problem. He’s pretty good at this game,” he said with a chuckle. “I’ve seen him in here before, but he’s usually with an older woman. They usually stop here for a few minutes so he can play the game.” He patted Marcus on the shoulder. “You gave your sister quite a scare, man. You gotta stay close to her.”

“Sorry, Kal,” Marcus said with little conviction, still staring at the screen. I had to laugh because it was so Marcus.

“Yeah, okay, well, when you’re done with this level we’ve got to try these pants on.” He didn’t answer me, but I knew he’d heard me. A few minutes later he stepped away from the controller and looked at me.

“All right, let’s try the stupid pants on.” We walked past the electronics counter again and Marcus called out, “See ya later, Tim!”

“Later, buddy! Don’t give your sister such a hard time.”

Marcus waved at him in acquiescence and we continued to the dressing room. He went back into his original room and I heard fabric shuffling around so I knew he was on task.

“You really scared me, Marcus,” I said to the closed door of his dressing room. “I didn’t know where you were or if you were safe. Don’t ever wander away again.”

“I’m not a baby, Kal. I can take care of myself.” His words were firm and he sounded so much like the seventeen year old teenager he was, but he couldn’t grasp his limitations in this way. He would never think of himself the same way I did, and I wasn’t sure I wanted him to. I never wanted him to think of himself as handicapped or limited. I wanted, desperately, for him to believe he was capable of anything. But I couldn’t have him wandering away, either.

“I know you’re not a baby, Marky, but I still need to know where you are. Wouldn’t you be worried if I was suddenly missing?”

He was silent for a moment, but then I heard his voice and it was markedly warmer. “I’d be really scared if you disappeared.” I smiled just a little, never taking his love for me for granted, but it was also a relief to hear him understand my point of view. “I’m sorry. I won’t wander away anymore.” He sounded sincere, so I decided it was done and over with.

“Okay, thanks for apologizing. Now, are those pants fitting better?”

“Yup,” he said as he swung the door open wide, modeling the new pants. They looked like they fit fine, so I wanted to get out of there.

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