Losing Him (Mitchell Family #8)(43)

I was scared to ask. “What did I hit?”

“You pulled out onto the road in front of a tractor trailer. He hit you on the driver’s side and sent your car out into a field.”

I still couldn’t remember anything. It was as if he was telling me some sick joke to get a rise out of me, except his demeanor never changed. He stood there straight faced explaining the actions of how I’d gotten in the hospital. “Was the driver hurt?”

“Apparently he walked away from it. Even his truck wasn’t badly damaged. I think Amy said that he just needed some bumper repair.”

“I was drunk?” I still couldn’t believe it.

“I’m afraid so.”

Then it hit me. “You came back for me?”

He nodded. “Jacob and I turned around that night. We slept at a hotel and drove back in the morning. Your mom’s house was dark and the car was gone, so I thought you went home to find us. It wasn’t until we were home that we found out what happened. Conner was nice enough to meet me at the airport and bring me here. They all feel bad about what happened.”

“What do you mean?”

He chuckled and it made me nervous. What could I have done to that family? “After you drank yourself into a stupor, you drove your mother’s car to the farm. I don’t know how it is set up. But they were all out in some barn. You barged in and gave them a piece of your mind. Ty said he tried to talk to you, but you weren’t hearing it. You got mad and flew down the lane, where you pulled out onto the road and had your accident.”

I was in shock, partly because I’d had the nerve to do something so bold and also because I couldn’t remember any of it. “I don’t recall anything after you left, Jess. I don’t remember any of it.”

“You were wearing the wedding dress.” He didn’t say it like it was funny. He said it like it was going to help me remember.

“No way. I wouldn’t do that. My mother worked so hard on it.” I was in shock.

“I feel like this is all my fault. If I’d just stayed then none of this would have ever happened.”

I was already starting to cry, imagining the fool I’d made of myself and then the fact that I’d ruined an irreplaceable dress that my mother had made for me. I’d promised myself that I wouldn’t ever disappoint her again and just days after she died, I was destroying the most precious gift she ever gave me, aside from life.

Jessie leaned over and kissed my hand. “Don’t cry, baby. Everything is going to be okay. I’m going to get you home with me and Jacob. We’re going to be together and everything will be exactly how you wanted it to be. I promise.”

It was just too much to take. First, I thought I was dreaming, now reality was just as weird. The last time I’d seen Jessie he was ending things for good. Now, all of the sudden, he wanted us to be a family. I couldn’t help but think that maybe he was only saying that because of my accident. It made me sad and confused. “You don’t have to do that. I will figure out how to manage everything.”

He tightened his brow. “No! You’re going to be out of work. You won’t be able to afford the apartment. Plus, we need to figure out what to do with your mother’s house. You’re moving in with me. I’m not going to argue with you about it.”

Due to the fact that I wanted it more than anything, I put on my best smile and agreed. Besides, it meant that I could be with my son every single day. Maybe in time, Jessie would appreciate that devotion and would really want to be with me again. I couldn’t push him. I knew he was doing this because I had nobody else. He may have been an * at times, but his heart was huge and he couldn’t walk away from me being in the situation that I’d gotten myself into. Eventually I would heal and then the story would be different.

“It sounds like you have it all figured out.”

A doctor came in the room and I recognized his voice right away. “Hey stranger. Do me a favor. The next time you’re in town, stop by my office instead of landing yourself in this place, okay?”

“Okay.”

Jessie moved out of the way to let the doctor stand in front of me. I hated trying to see people out of the corner of my eyes.

He did an examination of my eyes and my reflexes. Even though I couldn’t sit up to see my body, I could feel everywhere that he touched, which gave me hope. After that, he ordered a few tests and told me that I’d have to stay in the hospital for another week, just to be safe. I agreed to all of his terms, told him my medical information that he didn’t know and we said our goodbyes for the day.

With an idea of when I’d be getting out of the hospital, Jessie started making arrangements for us to get home. I’d have to start therapy as soon as possible, which would take place at his house.

I laid there while he made phone call after phone call, listening to him being so responsible. It was a real shame that it was out of pity. I would have liked to marry him and be with him forever. At least I’d have a little time to get myself together, physically and financially, before he kicked me to the curb again.

I’d never want to hurt myself to get Jessie’s attention. That part of my life was over a long time ago. It still felt good knowing that he was there for me.

Since I couldn’t remember going to the Mitchell farm, I couldn’t help but wonder what happened there. I wanted to know who I told off and what was said. Did I fight with Miranda and make her hate me even more than she already did? Did I hurt anyone or threaten them?