Belong (Seven Year Itch #3)(5)
“I WANT TO KNOW!” When I raised my voice Veronica jumped. She took a step back away from me, her flustered face revealing her sheer fear.
I followed her into the bedroom, standing over her as she sat down on our bed. It was hard to imagine her being with someone else on our mattress, but for some reason I could see it vividly playing out. Every man fantasizes about having two women, but in this situation it wasn’t sexy at all. I felt threatened. “Like I said before, she was providing me with emotional support. I’ve been having nightmares again.” She cried harder.
Maybe I should have stayed stern, but I had mercy for her damaged soul. Her nightmares about her uncle had been happening since the truth was revealed. I can’t begin to count how many nights she’d spent pacing because she was afraid to close her eyes. I used to make her feel safe, but now I knew she’d gotten used to me. She longed for someone to help her alleviate the pain she couldn’t seem to let go of.
I sat beside her, putting my arm around her shoulder as she wept. “Nothing is going to hurt you, Veronica. He’s dead. He’s not coming back.”
She nodded. “I know. Trust me, I know. He’s always there though, in the back of my mind. They won’t stop, Chad. I didn’t want to tell you about it. You’ve been so busy lately, and it’s my problem. I couldn’t come to you.”
“It’s our problem. You’re my wife.”
“Dr. Ryan, Shelly, she’s been helping. I’ve been seeing her twice a week for the past few months. In that time we’ve grown to be friends, maybe more I suppose. I’m not a lesbian, but we connect. I think I’m drawn to her because she has the answers to help me. She makes me feel the safest.” She paused for second. “I’m not trying to hurt you, or our marriage. You think I don’t love you, but I do. Something has changed though; something inside of me. I care about her too.”
“What are you saying? Are you telling me you don’t want this?” I wasn’t even certain I did.
Her sobbing was getting to be uncontrolled. “I don’t know what I want anymore.”
It was too much for me to handle. In that moment I couldn’t be the understanding husband. I had to walk away before I said things I’d regret later. It was important to calm down before we continued the conversation. “I’m sleeping downstairs tonight.” I took a pillow, and my phone, including the charger and headed in the direction of my office, in hopes of being able to rest in the midst of all hell breaking loose in my life.
In the hallway I saw Harper with a stuffed bunny rabbit in her arms. “Daddy, I’m scared.”
She’d obviously heard us fighting and been frightened by it. I hated the idea of her not being able to understand. I picked her up and carried her back to her room, nestling up beside her on the twin-sized bed. “Daddy won’t let anything happen to you, pumpkin. I promise.”
I waited until she was fast asleep to let my emotions out. She didn’t ever need to see me vulnerable. I had to always be the hero she sought out when she was scared.
I had no idea what the next day would bring, but I was sure I wouldn’t lose my daughter because of what her mother had done to our marriage.
Chapter 3
The sound of my phone ringing shot me up out of bed. Before locating it on the table beside me, I took in my surroundings, remembering how I’d gotten in my daughter’s room, and more importantly why.
Bile rose to my throat as I focused in on the caller, realizing right away it was one I didn’t want to miss. I hurried out of the room and down the stairs so I wouldn’t wake the girls. I had a feeling this wasn’t going to be a good call, especially since it was so early.
I hadn’t always been a Californian. In my heart, I’d always reside on the east coast, where we had four dramatic seasons, and enough memories to warm even the most broken of hearts.
What the number also represented was the family I’d been neglecting ever since I moved across the country ten years ago. Veronica hated the east coast. When I forced her to visit, the couple times she’d agreed, it had been winter, wet and miserable. She was used to the warm California sun, so of course thought it was the most wretched place to want to be. During the last visit home, she’d taken Harper and left early, because she said the weather was causing her to be depressed.
I shook off the thought, not needing any more reasons to resent her.
I answered abruptly, figuring it had something to do with my elderly grandfather, who’d raised me ever since my parents both died. He’d not only provided me with an education and a roof over my head, but he’d deeded me his company in order for me to fulfill my own aspirations.
His health hadn’t been great in years. He’d gone through cancer treatment several times, and doctors were baffled that he’d gone into remission at his late age.
“Hello?”
“Chad, it’s Gracie. I’m calling with some bad news. I’m afraid your grandfather has taken a turn for the worst. He’s in the hospital, but the doctor isn’t optimistic about him coming home this time. He’s having me call to get him into hospice care.”
“Damn. That’s terrible.” With everything else on my plate I struggled to find the words needed to comfort the old woman. She’d been taking care of him for years, even before my grandmother passed away. In many ways, Gracie was like a grandparent to me, and I knew she was going to take the news especially hard. Going home wasn’t even a difficult decision for me. “I’ll be on the first flight.”