Wicked Force (Wicked Horse Vegas #4.5)(34)

My mom gives me an encouraging smile. Marshall, who is the casting director for the movie, stands from his chair at the end of the table and turns to Ian. He nods toward the door. “Let’s talk.”

Ian also gives me a smile intended to reassure, although I’m pretty sure I bombed this audition. The mere fact Marshall told me my performance was “fine” is validation.

When the door shuts behind them, Justin turns to me. I thought I’d be star struck by him as he’s one of the hottest young actors out there but instead I was just a bit disgusted. He might have the dark dreamy looks every girl fantasizes about, but his personality turned me off from the start. Vain, entitled, and slightly rude, I was bordering on being repulsed.

He ordered one of Marshall’s assistants to bring him a very specific brand of vitamin water and when she told him they didn’t have any, he ordered her to go get it. He then shot me a leering grin as if his power would impress me. I glared at him in return.

“They’re not going to offer you the part,” he says and the negative words out of the blue cause me to jump.

My mother’s eyebrows knit together. “Why is that?” she asks in a neutral voice but I can hear the slight panic within.

Justin gives me his back to regard my mother with even more amusement. “Because her delivery is stilted and she kisses with all the passion of a dead fish. She’ll never be able to sell herself to an audience.”

Rude as hell.

There’s no response my mother can give because this is THE Justin Voss telling her critical information that’s probably very accurate. We know nothing of the business and he knows everything.

Pivoting my way, he gives me a smile that doesn’t reach his eyes. “Well, it’s been... charming. Best of luck to you in life.”

Without another word, he casually saunters out the door and it’s then that I notice that he never even opened the bottle of water he made that poor assistant go out for.

When the door closes, I mutter, “What a douche.”

“That’s Hollywood, I suppose,” my mom replies and doesn’t seem put out in the slightest.

“You really think that’s how it is here?” Because if it is, I hate it already.

She shrugs. “I guess it’s like this anywhere. There are nice people and there are jerks. You just have to learn to let it roll off your back.”

I suppose that’s good advice but it’s hard. I take things to heart and I don’t doubt everything Justin just said—right down to my dead fish kiss—was true. I was awful but I don’t know what the hell I’m doing. The few days I had with an acting coach in Vegas weren’t very fruitful at all. I tried to give the delivery like I was instructed but it was hard when you constantly doubt yourself. Or when you’re just not feeling it.

That’s part of the problem. I’m pursuing something that was never even on my radar. I’m having a hard time drumming up an internal passion for this type of art.

God bless Kynan this past week. We settled into a routine that had me walking on clouds. He had to work during the day so I practiced with the acting coach. He’d come see my show and after, he’d take me out for a late meal. Then it was back to his apartment where he would make love to me, sometimes twice, before we’d lapse into long talks about our future.

I never stayed all night. He usually brought me home sometime after midnight, with the new bodyguard, Cash, awkwardly following behind. My mother never waited up for me but I could tell by her disapproving look the next morning she didn’t like me spending time at Kynan’s. Not because of my age, because my mom already respected me as an adult I believe, but because I was spending too much time with him.

On my two days off this past week, I met Kynan at his place after he got off work and he helped me practice the scenes I was auditioning for. He was patient and encouraging, and totally hilarious as he tried to “play” Justin’s part in the movie. When we got to the kiss part, it was usually all over for both of us. We ended up naked and rolling around wherever we happened to be. That’s how we ended up christening his couch and kitchen table.

And oh my... the sex.

I feel like I’ve turned into such a slut with wanting him all the time. I could be in the middle of a show, happen to turn to glance at him off stage, and my body reacts. One time my nipples went painfully hard and were popping through my costume. I was embarrassed but still incredibly turned on with wanting him when the show ended. We hurried out of the theater that night without taking off my makeup.

I fondled him on the drive home, almost making him wreck. When we got into his apartment, I dropped to my knees before he even got the door closed and started unzipping his jeans. It was the first time I had him in my mouth and I’ll never forget the sounds I pulled from him that night.

“What are you thinking about?” my mom asks, and my cheeks flame hot that she busted me fantasizing about Kynan.

So I lie to her. “I was just thinking that if I can’t get through a kiss with Justin, how am I going to do the sex scenes?”

That’s another issue I have with the script. There are two pretty explicit scenes, and while Ian assured me he could put in a no-nudity clause, I really didn’t think I could act my way through it. One of the scenes would be me and Justin having sex up against a wall where he would be pounding ruthlessly inside of me. I’d be clothed but I’d have to put on quite a show and it made me slightly nauseated to think about it.