Until Harry(78)

In the space of three hours after I cemented my decision to move away, we arranged everything, and it was set that I would fly out after Lavender’s funeral. I overheard in the hospital waiting room that her funeral was in four days’ time, so it left me virtually no time to break the news to my family that I was leaving. I knew the conversation would be bad, but my mind was made up. I had to leave. Staying in York just wasn’t something I could do.



I was about to tell my family that I was moving away, and even though I had my uncle in my corner, I was still scared shitless. I leaned against the kitchen counter while my family sat around the table. My uncle was leaning against the wall opposite me, with his arms folded across his chest. They all waited for me to speak.

“Lavender’s gone and she is never going to come back to me.” I sat, looking down at the floor. “And I haven’t even begun to fully comprehend that yet. She only died three days ago, and nothing feels real to me. I’m expecting her to text me or walk into my room.”

“Darlin’,” my nanny murmured.

I bit down on my lower lip. “I want you all to listen to me clearly when I say what I have to say. It’s important, okay?”

I looked up and found each person nodding.

“I love Kale,” I breathed.

My brothers shared a look, and so did my parents before their gaze refocused on me.

“You love Kale?” My father blinked.

“I always have,” I said, nodding.

My mother played with her fingers. “Are you in love with him?” she asked.

“Yes,” I replied.

My father set his jaw. “And him? Does he love you?”

I shook my head. “Not in that way. He doesn’t even know that I love him. I’ve never told him.”

“Why not?” Layton asked.

Where to begin? my mind grumbled.

“Because everyone has gone on and on about how much of a brother and sister we are to one another, when I’ve never thought of him like that. Not since I was little.”

My mother paled. “I didn’t . . . I didn’t know it was love,” she blurted out. “I thought it was a crush.”

I frowned at her. “It’s not your fault, Mum. I’ve kept how I felt about Kale to myself. Only Lavender and Uncle Harry knew how I felt about him, but they were both sworn to secrecy by me.”

My father cut his eyes to my uncle and glared at him, hard. It surprised me because I had never even seen my dad and uncle argue.

“Stop, Dad,” I chastised. “I made him swear not to tell.”

My father cut his eyes to mine. “Something is going on here, something bigger than Lavender and Kale. What is it? Tell me. Now.”

Bloody hell, I thought. Does anything get by him?

I rubbed my face with my hands. “I can’t be here anymore,” I said, swallowing nervously. “Lavender is gone, and Kale . . . he and Drew are having a baby.”

“What?” my brothers gasped in unison.

“Drew is pregnant?” Lochlan asked.

I nodded.

“Oh, honey,” my nanny frowned.

“I can’t stay here and watch them have a family. I can’t stay here without Lavender. I need to get away.”

My father set his jaw. “Like on a holiday?”

I shook my head. “No, Dad, not like a holiday.”

Things were silent for a moment until Layton said, “You want to move away?”

I nodded.

“To where?” he asked.

It’s now or never, I told myself.

“To New York.”

Silence.

“Can you repeat that?” my father said, his voice dangerously low.

I swallowed. “I’m moving to New York.”

My father’s face turned a shade of red I had never seen before. He flicked his eyes to where my uncle stood, and he glared. “What the fuck is this?” he asked.

My uncle’s shoulders sagged. “She can’t be here anymore, Tom. She needs to get away and clear her head.”

“So go down to the country for a spa weekend or something,” my father bellowed when he looked back to me. “You are not moving to America. No fucking way.”

I pinched the bridge of my nose. “I’m twenty, Dad. I don’t need your permission.”

“Don’t throw that in his face,” Layton snapped at me. “You aren’t thinking clearly; you can’t—”

I cut my brother off: “I can’t ever think clearly here, Layton. I need to leave and figure myself out.”

“Have you forgotten what happened to you last year?” he raged. “You could have died, and now you want to up and leave the country on your own? That’s fucking selfish of you. You can’t do that to us.”

I pushed my hair out of my face. “I’m not trying to hurt anyone, Layton, but this is my decision.”

“It’s a shitty fucking one!” he bellowed, surprising all of us.

Layton was not one to fight; he was usually the peacekeeper, but not today. Today he was furious, and I was his target.

“I’m sorry you feel that way,” I said calmly.

Lochlan growled. “You aren’t moving to America.”

I set my jaw. “Yes, I am. It’s all arranged.”