The Stand-In Boyfriend (Grove Valley High #1)(85)

IT’S A WEEK LATER AND I’m staring at the clock on my dashboard. It’s 6:34. I’ve been sitting here in my car for 23 minutes—23 minutes of me staring at the time, periodically glancing out the window thinking I have the guts to get out of the car, but then I don’t and return to staring at the dashboard.

Because I’m too much of a coward to get out.

Because I’m parked outside Chase’s house.

Because I’m terrified he’ll confirm that he hates me.

My phone pings and when I go to check it, I see a text from Jessie. I don’t bother to open it. He’s been attentive and affectionate all week, something I’ve waited years for, but I can’t enjoy it because despite the way he’s acting, I know I’ve hurt Chase. I can’t stand how much I’ve hurt him.

I think maybe Jessie’s gotten a bit of hassle at school over this whole thing. Chase hasn’t said anything to him but I know a few people have told Jessie they think what we did was shady. They don’t know the whole story and Jessie hasn’t corrected them, but I think he got sick of all the gossip the other day because he came up to me at my locker and kissed me without warning. I was startled and flustered afterward, and not entirely happy about the PDA, but I could see the stress in his face and I think he did it to prove to whoever was looking that we were good and we didn’t care what they were saying. Then he hugged me to him and when I glanced down the hallway, over his shoulder, I saw Chase standing with Aaron, his eyes locked on us. He saw the kiss. He saw the whole thing, and it made me feel sick to my stomach. He didn’t say anything to Aaron, just turned and walked away, but the look on his face has been stuck in my head ever since. I hate that I’m the cause of that expression on his face.

There’s a sharp knock on my driver’s window and I jump out of my skin.

Rosie Mitchell’s standing there. She waits for me to react, and when I just sit there staring back at her like the dumbest idiot in the world, she rolls her eyes and makes a circle motion with her hand, indicating that I should roll my window down. I hit the button while she puts her hands on her hips, staring at me. Her face looks irritated but not entirely hostile.

“You’ve been sitting here for half an hour.”

“Um…yeah, I know, sorry.”

“I got tired of waiting for you to grow a pair and actually get out.”

“Oh, sorry, I—”

“He’s not here,” she cuts in. “I think he’s at Aaron’s.

“Oh.” Disappointment floods me, because although I’m scared to talk to him, I want to. I really, really want to. I’m pretty sure Aaron wouldn’t be too impressed with me showing up at his house though. He says the bare minimum to me in class. He’s not happy with me; that much is pretty obvious.

Rosie’s watching me closely, her eyes narrowed on my face. She looks away for a second, makes a decision, and then turns back to me. “Look, why don’t you come in for a minute? He won’t be back for a while, but I think we should talk.”

“Um, so, did he…did he tell you?”

“Tell me you broke up?”

I nod my head.

“No, but he’s been in a shitty mood since last weekend so I figured something was up, and then I spoke to Aaron and he told me what actually happened.”

I swallow while she just levels me with a stare, her face indifferent. “I, um…”

“Come on.” She jerks her head in the direction of her house. “We need to talk.” She turns and walks up her drive before I have a chance to say anything in return.

By the time I find her again, she’s leaning against the breakfast counter in the kitchen. She didn’t even bother to wait for me at the door, and I’m starting to regret following her in here. I know how protective she is of Chase, and she’s clearly not happy with me.

“Why did you come here?” she asks.

I’m honest. “I want to talk to him. I want to make sure he’s okay.”

“Why?”

Why? Because I care about him. Because I haven’t thought about anything but him since he walked away from me on that Saturday night.

She sighs. “Did you really hook up with someone else last week?”

Shame floods me. I cheated on him. No matter what agreement we had, I cheated on Chase that night. I’ve been thinking about it, and that’s what it comes down to. If it had been the other way around and Chase had disappeared at the party and then I found him with Abigail or some other girl, I would have been gutted, no doubt about it. “Yes.”

“With this Jessie guy?”

My eyes snap to hers. “Aaron told you about him?”

She nods. “Yeah. You’ve been into him forever right?”

My jaw falls open. I didn’t think she’d know about that. “What, um…” I clear my throat. “What else did Aaron tell you?”

“That Chase talked you into pretending to date him to make this Jessie guy jealous and you’ve been faking it this whole time.”

“He told you that?”

“Yeah.” She crosses her arms. “Dumbest idea I ever heard.”

I don’t say anything to that. She’s not wrong. This whole thing is a complete mess, a complete dumb mess, but I don’t agree with her fully, because without this stupid idea I never would have gotten to know Chase.