The Boatman's Wife(61)

Lily’s heart froze inside of her. Noreen paused, as if wondering whether to say something else, but then she pressed on with the story.

‘As I said, her father was dead against Connor. But when it came to his daughter being an unwed mother, well, he wasn’t having that. The Malones think they’re above the rest of us, but really they’re just pig farmers who’ve made a lot of money. They have a big Dallas-style ranch just outside of town. Anyway, there was holy war over it. In the end, Connor married Eve to keep the peace. Although Rosemary, his grandmother, went wild. There was a story she went down to the Malone house and was shouting at Mr Malone out in the yard, that it would all end in tears if those two kids got married.’

Lily put her hand on her chest. She could barely breathe with shock. Connor had been married to someone else. But worse than that – he had a child out there somewhere? How could he not have told her all of this?

Noreen put her hand on hers. ‘I can see you’re very shocked, darling, but I’m sorry to tell you, there’s more to the story.’

Lily removed her hand. She didn’t like Noreen calling her ‘darling’, either. They weren’t friends.

‘I remember seeing Connor and Eve together, and they were not a happy couple,’ Noreen said. ‘Mismatched. Well, the only thing they liked in common was drinking and partying. Which Eve continued to do when she was pregnant. Her family insist on painting a picture of this meek, studious girl they say she was before she met Connor, but I think in many ways she was more a tearaway than him.’

Noreen paused. Clearly struggling to continue with the story, she wrapped her cardigan around her tighter.

‘But where’s Eve now? And the child?’ Lily asked, shakily. This was the last thing she was expecting to find in Connor’s homeland: another wife and a child. His child. How could he have abandoned them?

‘It’s not what you’re thinking, Lily,’ Noreen said, clearly reading her face. ‘Something happened. Something terrible.’

Lily went rigid with anticipation, her breath shallow in her chest as Noreen continued.

‘Eve would have been about five months pregnant, and she was still gadding about. To be fair to her, she hadn’t even hit her eighteenth birthday, and she wanted to have fun before she got tied down with the baby. She and Connor went to a party, and word has it, he got drunk. But still, he got in their car to drive them home.’ Noreen shook her head, looking sorrowful. ‘No one really knows how it happened, Lily, but Connor crashed the car. Eve and her baby were killed.’

‘Oh my God,’ Lily said, bringing her hands to her face in shock.

‘It was a terrible business altogether, as you can imagine. Connor ended up in court, accused of drunk driving. As a juvenile he got a fine, and banned from driving for four years.’

Lily’s mouth fell open in horror. How could she have had no idea at all about her husband’s past?

‘And of course, as you’ve worked out, the two brothers you met in the pub – Daniel and Sean Malone – were Eve’s brothers. When Connor got back from his court appearance, Sean Malone beat him up and made threats in front of a rake of people. He had the whole GAA behind him.’

‘What’s the GAA?’ Lily asked.

‘It stands for Gaelic Athletic Association,’ Noreen told her. ‘All the young lads around here are part of it. It can be very tribal,’ she explained. ‘I believe Connor had no choice but to leave.’

Lily thought of the game she’d been watching in the pub the night she’d met Daniel and Sean. How wild and fierce the players had seemed, without any protection from each other as they’d swung their sticks.

Noreen reached over and squeezed her hand. ‘I know it’s a lot to take in,’ she said.

‘But what about Rosemary?’ Lily whispered, clutching on to the one piece of information she knew about Connor’s past. ‘Could she not have helped Connor?’

‘Poor Rosemary, I see her in the shops now and again. Terrible sad for her. You see, when Connor was up in court on the charge, and had admitted it, Rosemary was still claiming he was innocent. Back she went to the Malone’s yard, shouting that her grandson would never drink drive. Eve’s father blackened her name in the community for that.’ Noreen sighed. ‘She keeps to herself. Hides away in her house by the lake. I heard she was receiving hate mail, being called a murderer’s grandmother and such. I don’t know why she hasn’t moved further away by now.’

Lily stood up, pushing her unfinished breakfast away. ‘Please can you tell me where she lives? I need to speak with her.’

Noreen gave her a considered look, and then pulled out a notepad and pen from the kitchen drawer. ‘Her house doesn’t have a name or number, that’s how it is around here, but it’s on the road right by Bunduff Lough. It’s a stone cottage with a green door.’ Noreen drew a little map on the piece of paper and handed it to Lily. ‘Are you all right, darling? Are you sure you don’t want a cup of tea first, just to take it all in?’

‘Thanks for telling me, I appreciate it,’ Lily said. It was hard to believe everything that Noreen had just told her. ‘I don’t know if I’ll go see her but right now I need some air.’



It was raining, but Lily didn’t care. She needed to walk without stopping. The rain lashed into her, and within minutes her jeans were soaked, rain streaming down her face and dripping off the end of her hood. Her sneakers squelched as she walked. She hadn’t even thought to put on her boots. She walked through the village, past the boats and the pub she was in last night, and kept on walking, out the other side and round the headland. Waves crashed against the coast alongside her as she put her head down and into the rain. Her heart was beating so fast. How could Connor have kept such a huge lie from her for the whole of their marriage? No wonder he hadn’t wanted children. Part of her was so angry with him, furious. He’d hidden a whole part of his life from her, and she had shown him everything in her life. He had been part of her family. Had he not loved her enough to confide in her? Shame followed in closely upon her anger. Was it her fault? Had she been so forbidding, he couldn’t tell her? Their marriage had always been about her – Connor living in her hometown, supporting her work as a fisher, finally agreeing to go for a baby because she’d wanted it. But he’d known all along he could have kids, when they’d been suffering from fertility problems, and he’d never told her. She swung between anger at him, and then desperate sadness.