Ruin(49)

I froze.
He seemed to stop breathing as he slowly turned me in his arms to face him. His hungry eyes devoured every inch of my body. I was halfway out of the water. Holy crap, what was I supposed to do?
“If I didn’t want to go to heaven so damn bad…” He smiled sadly and released me. “Let’s go watch a movie.”
“No more skinny dipping?”
“If we skinny dip any longer I can’t make good on my promises.” Wes cursed and looked away, swimming farther into the deep end.
“Oh yeah?” I put my hands on my hips, kind of digging the fact that he was having trouble with control.
“Yeah, like if you don’t get out of this damn pool in five seconds I’m going to take advantage of you against the wall and I’d hate for your first time to be over so quick.”
I blushed. And then I hightailed it out of the pool feeling all kinds of embarrassed and excited.
“Good choice!” He called after me as I grabbed my towel and went to change.
****

I told myself it was ridiculous to have to spend the night in Wes’s arms in order to not have bad dreams, so I got ready for bed and promised myself I’d try to sleep by myself and not be such a baby.
I was just piling the throw pillows into the corner when someone knocked on my door. With one last throw, the pillows were off and I made my way over to the door. I opened it just a crack and saw Wes, again shirtless and just in a pair of low pajama bottoms.
“Lamb?” His head tilted almost like a predator.
“Wolf,” I said dryly.
“I thought you might be scared.” He cleared his throat and rocked on his feet. “So I’m here to offer my cuddling services.”
“Are you?” I crossed my arms and laughed. “How noble.”
“I thought so.” He looked down at the ground and leaned against the door frame. “Actually, I just wanted to spend the night with you… it’s close to midnight and I really… don’t want to wake up alone, not on Black Friday.”
I opened the door wider and let him walk in.
“Rules…” I cleared my throat. “You have to spoon.”
“Let me out! Let me out!” He laughed and tried to make his way back to the door, but I stopped him and pushed against his chest.
“Promise me.” I let my hands trail down his muscles and dip into his pajama pants.
He swayed towards me. “I’ll promise you anything if you keep doing what you’re doing.”
“So weak.” I shook my head.
“So attracted.” He tilted my chin. “So hard — to say no to.”
“So say yes.” I winked over my shoulder and jumped into bed.
“Tell me, when did you become such a temptress?”
“It’s the red hair.” I sighed and turned on my side.
“It really is.” Wes reached for my hair and twirled it around his fingers, “I’m going to miss your hair.”
“‘Cause I’m cutting it?” I asked.
“Nah, I’m just going to miss not having it suffocating me in the morning. You have no idea how arousing it is to wake up with your scent all over me.”
I wasn’t sure what to say.
“I made you uncomfortable,” Wes said in a sheepish voice “Sorry, you know how I am with censoring myself.”
I tucked my hands under my head. “It’s okay.”
The room fell silent. Wes lay on his back staring up at the ceiling. His breathing was even and somewhat loud. I noticed the black under his eyes again and then I looked closer. His skin wasn’t its normal golden hue; it had a pale look to it, almost like he’d been vampiring it all over town and was in need of a fix.
“Wes.” I licked my lips. “Would you lie to me?”
“Huh?” He turned so quick we almost bumped heads.
“Just answer.”
“No.” He quickly broke eye contact.
“Are you feeling okay?”
His nostrils flared, he looked down and then his shoulders slumped as if he was carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders. “Ask me after Homecoming.”
“Huh? Why after Homecoming?”
He shrugged. “I can’t lie to you, so ask me after Homecoming. Then I’ll tell you.”
“You’ll tell me why sometimes you look healthy as a horse and other days you look like you can barely stand?”
“All of it.” His voice was thick and hoarse. “I promise.”
“Okay.” I wasn’t satisfied, not by a long shot. Maybe he had diabetes or something else like that? Heck, I knew how guys were with being sick especially if they were anything like my Uncle. Pride was huge, and it was entirely possible he was just embarrassed about all of it.
His muscled arm came around my shoulders as he pulled me to him. “Time to spoon, Lamb.”
“I’ve only ever spooned with you.”
“Good,” he whispered in my ear. “I want your firsts to be with me… that way I can kill whoever gets you second.”
“I only want firsts.”
He ran his left hand over my hip. “I want that too.”
“Goodnight, Wes.”
“Night, my little lamb.”



Chapter Thirty-Seven

Time is going by way too fast — my body can feel it, my soul hates it, and my heart is breaking every damn day.

Weston
The weekend with Kiersten was at the top of my list as best weekends ever. Friday I hadn’t been in the mood to do anything except mope around. We watched movies all day and ate popcorn balls.