Present Perfect(38)

The voice in my head kept screaming, SHUT UP, AMANDA MARIE KELLY!!

“Yeah, incredibly cute,” he said with a smirk.

He pushed off the car and stepped to the side, allowing me some breathing space. After closing the door and fumbling with my keys, I summoned the courage to glance up. Brad was still standing beside my car with his hands in his pockets, watching me with a kissable smile across his face.

Kissable smile?! What the hell is wrong with me?

Finally, I got the damn key in the ignition, started the car, and peeled out of the parking lot. When I got far enough away and my nerves had calmed, the ability to think clearly returned. I didn’t know how that boy got me so unhinged, so quickly. Even though the Brad encounter was overwhelming, I was proud of myself for agreeing to go to the party with him. I needed to do this. I had to do this. It’s time to put on my big girl panties and see what the world had to offer.





No matter how hard you try to move on, sometimes forces beyond your control won’t let you.





That night, I was in my room trying to study. I was having a hard time concentrating on chemistry homework. My thoughts drifted from Noah to Brad. Spending the night thinking about Noah was nothing new. I had been doing that for what felt like forever. Thinking about Brad, on the other hand, was something completely different.

I couldn’t figure out what it was about him that captured my thoughts so quickly and aggressively. I had seen the guy around school for three years and not once gave him a second thought. I never thought of myself as one of those girls who got giddy and flustered over a good looking and charming boy’s attention. Our verbal sparring match at my locker was fun. Then he got very close to me and I became a babbling idiot.

I only allowed myself to daydream about Brad briefly before focusing my thoughts back to Noah. I knew it was silly and made no sense, Noah was barely in my life, and it had been like that for the past four months, but I felt guilty for just thinking about Brad.

A tapping on my bedroom window caught my attention. I had been so focused on Noah and Brad, at first, I thought I was hearing things. I went back to studying. I heard it again, this time it was more forceful. It wasn’t my imagination. I walked over, took a deep breath, and opened the window. The most exquisite pair of light blue eyes gazed up at me, accompanied by a dazzling smile that reached them. The butterflies started to appear in my stomach and my palms were getting moist. It had been a long time since I had been this close to him and it was intoxicating.

“Hey, Tweet,” Noah said in a raspy voice.

God, I missed hearing my nickname flow over his lips, those incredibly soft full lips. I shook my head, trying to get my thoughts back to the present.

“Hey,” I whispered.

“Can we talk?”

“Sure. What do you want to talk about?”

“Not here, at our spot.”

I almost flew out the window, I was so excited. He wanted to spend time with me, alone, at our spot. I couldn’t have cared less why he wanted to talk. It had to be good news. He was smiling. Maybe he had enough time and we could be together again. Right now, the only thing that mattered to me was Noah and I going to our spot to be alone.

We walked in silence the entire way. Noah seemed a little uncomfortable. If I were being honest, I was on edge, too. It felt strange, but I figured it was because we hadn’t been alone like this in a long time. Once we arrived, Noah extended his hand helping me climb up on the far end of the table. He didn’t join me. Instead, he leaned back on the edge beside me, with his legs crossed at the ankles, and his arms crossed over his chest.

We stayed like that for several minutes, before Noah cleared his throat and asked, “How have things been going?” He was looking down at the ground instead of me.

My gaze joined his on the same spot as I answered, “Pretty good. How are things going with you?”

“Ok. Coach thinks we have a pretty good chance at the championship this year.”

“Really? That’s fantastic.” I didn’t give a shit about the baseball team right now.

“Yeah. We’ll probably make the playoffs at least.” Out the corner of my eye, I saw him glance over at me and give me a quick smile. “How are your classes so far?”

“Good. How about yours?”

“Good,” he said.

I couldn’t believe we were actually having benign small talk. The weather should be next on the list. I hated that the time apart had created awkwardness between us. I was getting anxious, impatient, and I had enough of the small talk.

“Noah, why did you ask me here tonight?” My voice was low and filled with hesitancy.

His eyes stayed focused on the ground as he whispered, “I miss you.”

At that very moment, I heard a choir of angels start to sing, hallelujah. I desperately wanted to jump up, throw my arms around him, and never let go, but I didn’t.

“I’ve missed you, too,” I said, trying to contain my excitement.

“It hurts being away from you. I think about you all the time.”

“What do you think about?” It came out of my mouth more flirtatious than I intended.

Noah pushed off the table and moved directly in front of me. He took a few moments studying my face, like he hadn’t seen it in years. He cleared his throat and answered. “I think about how lonely I am without you. How boring my day is without you. How much I miss hearing your voice and your laugh. How much I miss listening to music and eating cake with you.” We smiled shyly at each other. His gaze lifted, looking directly into my eyes. “I miss taking care of you,” he hesitated for a moment. “I miss my best friend and I want her back in my life.” His words glued every piece of my shattered heart back together.