Playing It Safe(86)

He puts his hands up and then goes to lean against the kitchen counter. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“It’s okay,” I say. “And thank you for bringing me something to eat.”

“You’re welcome, Julia. I meant what I said about wanting to make it up to you, so it was the least I can do.”

“Yeah, about that, Aiden, I appreciate the gesture, but you really don’t have to keep doing that.”

“But I want to,” he says.

I hesitate to find the right words so that I don’t sound like an unappreciative bitch. “That’s just it, Aiden. You shouldn’t want to do anything. It’s been five years since we were together. We didn’t leave off on very good terms, and granted, you did apologize recently, and I really do appreciate that as well, but you’re engaged, and it’s just …”

“Just what?” he asks and takes a step toward me.

“It’s just really strange.” I wave my hands around me and then say, “All of this is.”

“It doesn’t have to be strange, Julia.”

“But it is,” I say in a huff and then catch my breath. As calmly as possible, I add, “Aiden, I’m sorry, but there is no other way to put this than we simply can’t be friends. It’s not healthy for me or you. And I’ll bet you a million dollars that if I don’t get it, then Sophia won’t either.”

He takes another step closer to me. Now he’s within arm’s reach and looking at me with an amused expression in his eyes. “What she doesn’t know won’t hurt her.”

“Oh my God, Aiden,” I gasp. “She doesn’t know that you’re here, does she?”

He shakes his head slightly, and then to my complete shock, his hand comes up to softly cup my cheek. “You’re right, she wouldn’t get it.”

I stiffen as he comes even closer to me. So close that our bodies are brushing against each other. “What are you doing?” I whisper.

Aiden doesn’t answer me with actual words. He does however answer me by bending his head and pressing his lips to mine. It all happens so fast but in slow motion. It’s as if I’m having an out-of-body experience where I’m hovering above us in my kitchen and watching myself be kissed by him. And as strange and foreign as it all looks and feels to me at first, I let him.

I lose myself for a few moments, reveling in the sensation of having him this close again, so desperate for affection from someone that I willingly follow Aiden’s lead. When his hand slowly wraps around my waist to bring us closer together, my hands inch up his chest and grab fistfuls of his T-shirt. He takes this as a sign of encouragement. Aiden groans into my mouth and then spins me around so that my lower back presses against the kitchen counter. It’s when he attempts to lift me onto the countertop a second later that I break off the kiss.

I get a glimpse of his eyes, which are clouded with lust, before he ducks his head and starts raining kisses across my neck and collarbone. I close my eyes and see nothing but Alex. I see the pain I caused him and the pain I’m inevitably creating for myself and others by what’s happening. That’s when reality comes crashing down around me and common sense finally decides to make an appearance.

My hands push against his chest as I say in a quiet voice, “Aiden, please stop.”

“Why?” he asks, slightly breathless against my neck.

“Because I don’t want this.”

He does stop then and lifts his head. Slowly, he grins as if he knows a secret or something. “I know what you want, Julia. I saw it in your face that night at the engagement party. I can see it in your eyes every time you look at me.”

“I don’t know what the f*ck you’re talking about, Aiden.”

“Yes you do,” he says with a light chuckle before attempting to kiss me again.

I push back on his chest a little harder this time, and he takes a step back.

“This was nothing more than temporary insanity. I’m sitting here depressed and heartbroken, and you come in with your food and white knight shit, and I fell for it. That’s what this is and nothing more.”

“Is that what you think?” he asks. “Because your body is saying something completely different.”

I snap my fingers in front of his face. “Aiden, you’re engaged, remember?”

“I remember just fine, and I have no intention of ever forgetting that. In fact,” he says while closing the distance between us again, “this will stay just between us. You know, for old time’s sake.”

“Are you mental? Did you lose IQ points when the blood flooded to your dick a few minutes ago? Because there is no way in hell that I end up with you in my bed tonight. Or ever, for that matter. I love Alex.”

“I did you a favor. That guy’s an *,” he says. “Looked at me as if I’m beneath him or some shit when I met him at the engagement party.”

As his lips touch my skin and his hands grab my waist, it all clicks into place like pieces to a puzzle. “Aiden, what did you do?”

“I told you, I did you a favor. Now stop talking so we can get back to what we were doing a few minutes ago.” He lifts his head and looks me dead in the eyes. “I promise you that you won’t be faking it this time.”