PULSE (Part Four)(5)

"Then she told me that she would go to the club to spy on her ex because he wasn't paying child support." His fist clenches at the mere mention of Drew's role in Cassandra's life. "I offered her legal advice. I set her up with a family law attorney so she could sue for back support, but she backed out."
"He pays nothing?" It's surprising given the fact that I know that he must be making a decent salary at the restaurant.
"She told me that he'd throw her a few hundred dollars here and there but he's so far behind on what he owes." He clears his throat. "Before they divorced he quit his job on Wall Street and decided he wanted to be a chef."
"Why?" I ask not because I expect Nathan to have an answer but because I don't see the logic in anything Drew does. "Why would he give up a good job?" I bite my tongue the moment the question leaves me. I did the same thing. I'd thrown away a great job in Connecticut to come to New York to try and make it in the culinary world.
"He's so f*cked. He gambled away virtually everything Cassie owns. She had to go to her parents for help after she and Drew split."
He knows so much about their relationship. He's so immersed in Cassie's divorce and her relationship with Drew. "How could you let me work with him and not tell me he was Cassandra's ex?"
"I didn't think it mattered, Jessica." The words sound genuine, even if I'm not absorbing them that way. "I didn't want it to matter."
"It all matters." I glance at the clock on the wall beside his desk. "Your five minutes are up."
"Don't go." He's back on his knee in front of me. "I'm not done explaining all of this."
"You should have told me who he was when you saw me with him at the club." I can't meet his gaze. I'm so empty right now and he'll see that and press to make things better. "You should have told me everything."
"None of it mattered."
"It didn't matter to you." I tap my hand on his chest. "It all matters to me. Every single detail."
"Let me explain about the bet." The reminder feels like a razor slicing through my skin.
"Why bother?" I push on him so I can rise to my feet. "We're done."



Chapter 6

"Hey, Jess." Cassandra pulls me into a weak embrace. "I was surprised to hear from you."
I settle back onto the park bench as she sits next to me. "I'm glad you brought the kids."
She nods towards the playground equipment. "They love it here. They miss you, you know. They talk about you a lot."
"How are you?" It's the expected question and one that will give me some time to gather my emotions before I dive into the subject of her ex.
"Great." The wide smile that covers her face says more than the word. "I've been struggling, but things are looking up."
"With the new guy?" Another momentary reprieve before I bring up Drew. How exactly am I going to do that? I wish I had given this more thought before I texted her after rushing out of Nathan's office.
She looks down at the ground before she answers. "With Nate. I saw him last night."
The words bite as they hurl their way through me. It's just another unwelcome reminder of her connection with him. My entire relationship with Nathan has been a lie just so he could help her. "Great." It's weak. It's lame and it's the only syllable I can utter right now.
"He's in love with someone." She waves to the twins as they race through the sand towards a set of swings.
"Oh," slips past my lips. "Do you still care about him?" That's not my business but my brain doesn't have any guardrails at the moment. I'm going to drive my entire life over a cliff just because I can't temper what I feel for Nathan Moore.
"As a friend." She pulls her long, brown hair into her fist to keep it from flying into her face in the wind. "We were never a good fit."
"You seemed to care a lot about him when we were at his apartment," I counter. Why am I doing this? Why push her to share things that don't matter at this point? He wagered money on whether he'd sleep with me before Drew. The fact that he made the bet after we'd already f*cked isn't lost on me. It's just semantics.  A man who claims to care about a woman doesn't do that. Plain and simple.
"He helped me when no one else would." She takes a deep breath. "I guess I needed a knight in shining armor and he wanted to be one."
I'd never use that phrase to describe him and my brain was having trouble wrapping itself around the concept. "What happened last night?" It's not my business. I know it's not but I can't help myself.
"He gave me a lecture about my ex." She takes a heavy swallow before she turns to look at me directly. "He told me it was time for me to stand up for myself.  He wants me to go after my ex for support."
I feel my stomach drop at the mention of Drew. "Your ex doesn’t pay support?" Another useless question to try and bide myself enough time to learn more about Drew.
"He's got issues." She laces her fingers in mine on my lap. "I still love him, Jess. I don't know how to stop."
I glance at her trembling hand and think about how mismatched Drew and she are. "He should be helping you with the kids." I know it's not my place to offer any opinion on her relationship with Drew. If I was actually going to be honest, I'd tell her to kick him square in the groin the next time she sees him, not only for being a deadbeat dad but for being an * too.