Maybe Someday(116)

Me: Just carve out some time for me

between now and then to run through

some new songs.

631/692

Brennan: Is someone over his writer’s

block?

Me: Yeah, well, someone once told me

heartache is good for lyrical inspiration.

Unfortunately, he was right.

Brennan: Sounds like a smart guy.

I close out my texts to Brennan and open one

up to Warren.

Me: March 18. I need a local venue. A

small one. Then I need you to get Sydney

to go there with you that night.

Warren: Is she supposed to know you or-

chestrated this?

Me: No. Lie to her.

Warren: Not a problem. I’m good at lying.

632/692

I set my phone down, pick up my guitar, and

walk out onto my balcony. It’s been almost a

month since I last saw her. Neither of us has

texted the other. I know Warren still keeps in

contact with her, but he refuses to tell me any-

thing, so I just stopped asking. As much as I miss

her and as much as I want to beg her to just let

this begin with us, I know time is better for both

of us right now. There was still too much guilt

rolled up in the thought of starting something too

soon, despite how much we wanted to be togeth-

er. Waiting until we’re both in a good place is

definitely what needs to happen.

However, I feel as if I’m already there. Maybe

it’s easier for me because I know where Maggie

and I stand, and I know where my heart stands,

but Sydney doesn’t have that reassurance. If time

will give her that reassurance, then I’ll give her

time. Just not too much. March 18 is only three

months away. I hope to hell she’s ready by then,

because I’m not sure I can keep myself away

from her for longer than that.

633/692

I scoot my chair to the edge of the balcony and

fold my arms over the railing, then look over at

her old balcony. Every time I come out here and

see her empty chair, it makes all of this so much

harder. But I can’t seem to find anything inside

my apartment that reminds me of her anymore.

She left nothing when she moved, and she really

never had anything while she was here. Being

outside on this balcony is the closest I can come

to feeling her since it seems we’re so far apart.

I lean back in my chair, pick up a pen, and be-

gin writing the lyrics to another song, with noth-

ing but her on my mind.

The cool air running through my hair

Nights like these, doesn’t seem fair

For you and I to be so far away

The stars all shimmer like a melody

Like they’re playing for you and me

But only I can hear their sounds.

I pick up my guitar and work through the first

few chords. I want these songs to be enough to

634/692

convince her that we’re ready, so every single

thing has to be perfect. I’m just nervous that I’m

relying too much on Warren to help make it hap-

pen. I hope he’s more reliable in this situation

with Sydney than he is with his rent checks.

Chapter Twenty Five

Sydney

“I’m not going.”

“Yes, you are,” Warren says, kicking my legs

off the coffee table. “I’m bored out of my mind.

Bridgette works all weekend, and Ridge is off

doing God knows what with God knows who.”

I immediately look up at him with my heart

caught in my throat.

He laughs. “That got your attention.” He

reaches forward, grabs my hands, and pulls me

off the couch. “I’m kidding. Ridge is at home

working, being a mopey little shit, just like

you’re trying to be. Now, go get pretty and come

out with me tonight, or I’ll sit on the couch with

you and force you to watch porn.”

636/692

I pull my hands from his and walk to the kit-

chen. I open a cabinet, then grab a cup. “I don’t

want to go out tonight, Warren. I had class all

day, and it’s my only night off from the library.

I’m sure you can find someone else to go with

you.” I grab a container of juice from the refri-

gerator and fill my glass. Leaning against the

counter, I take a sip as I watch Warren pout in

my living room. He’s kind of adorable when he

pouts, which is why I always give him such a

hard time.

“Listen up, Syd,” he says, walking toward the

kitchen. He grabs a bar stool and pulls it out, then

takes a seat. “I’m about to lay things out for you,

okay?”

I roll my eyes. “I doubt I can stop you, so go

ahead.”

He lays his palms flat on the counter in front of

him and leans forward. “You suck.”

I laugh. “That’s it? That’s what you needed to

lay out for me?”