Make Me Yours(70)

All these feelings and things I want to say to Ruby churn in my stomach. It all came to a head this past week.

She’s not interested in my money. She’s not interested in what I can give her. She likes me for me, and we have so much fun together. She makes me feel alive. I feel like I can trust her—not to mention how much I love seeing her with my daughter.

Picking up my phone, I tap the face of my old friend.

“Hastings here.” He speaks through an exhale.

“I have a situation and I need a sounding board.”

“Something happen with Stellan?” A tone enters his voice. “That kid was totally onboard the last time I talked to him. If you did something to piss him off—”

“It’s not about Stellan. It’s… personal.”

“I don’t do personal.”

“You’ll do it for me. I’m pissed and I’m tired and I feel fucking powerless.”

“You are never powerless. If something appears out of your control, you need to step back and reframe the situation.” He speaks like some old guru. “Unless it’s a woman. Then you’re probably powerless.”

“Ruby left me.”

He’s quiet a beat. “And?”

“That’s it. She packed up all her things and moved out this morning. Just like that.” I’m pacing my office, snatching up a stress ball and squeezing the shit out of it.

“Did she say why?”

“Some bitches at the preschool made a crack about her attending the gala with me. It made her feel like I was paying her… for her time.”

Stephen doesn’t need to know everything.

“You were paying her for her time. Her time spent with your daughter.”

The distinction makes me cringe. I played right into their stupid accusations putting the extra cash in with her check. I thought I was being generous. Now I realize how it made her feel.

He makes an impatient growl. “Do you care about this woman or not?”

It’s such a straightforward question. I step back, walking to the balcony, looking down over the patio where she spent so many afternoons with Lillie. Every day, I’d step outside and watch them paint or work in the garden or sing songs or just blow bubbles. It soothed my soul to know she was there. It was like a part of me that was missing had been found.

“Yes.” It’s so easy. “It didn’t matter. I asked her to stay, and she still left.”

“Did you tell her you wanted her to stay?”

Now I make the impatient growl. “It’s the same thing. I asked her to stay.”

“It is not the same thing, and I’m sure you framed it as being for Lillie.”

“Of course, I mentioned Lillie.” Remorse flashes in my neck. How could she not understand how much I wanted her to stay?

A long sigh fills my ear. “If you want her to stay, tell her. If you care about her, ask her on a date, propose to her. Marry the girl. Whatever is in your heart. Just stop making it harder than it is.”

“That’s what she said.”

“What?”

I can’t help it. It’s so easy.

“Thanks, man. I owe you.”

“Damn straight you do. Now go fucking get her and stop wasting my time.”

“Fuck off. I have a woman to claim.”

He chuckles and we disconnect the phone. I’m a problem-solver. Why didn’t I figure this out before now? Rubbing my chin, I’m stumped. What do I do with Lillie?





31





Ruby


Drew sits beside me on the bed rubbing my back.

After unpacking all my things last night, I opened a bottle of wine, drank most of it, then crawled beneath my covers and fell asleep. I opened my eyes a few times once the sun came up, but all I want to do is stay under the covers and cry.

“He tried to pay me extra for New York. In cash.” I sniff, my chest squeezing with the ache of a broken heart.

“He didn’t say it meant more to him?” Drew is wearing church clothes, leaning against my headboard while I stay under the covers.

“He didn’t say anything,” I wail.

“Men are bastards.” She shoves a tissue under the blanket, and I take it to blow my nose. “Not you, honey.”

The way she says it makes me crawl a little higher and peep out. I see Grayson leaning against the doorjamb looking down. His hand is in his pocket, and he looks like something out of a men’s magazine.

“I didn’t know Gray was here.”

“We came straight over from church. Your mom was worried about you when you didn’t show up today.”

“I couldn’t sit in church with those bitches.” I sit up, wrapping my comforter around my shoulders. “They pretty much flat out called me a hooker.”

“Don’t even think about those women.” Drew pulls me into a hug. “You’re going to come work for me now.”

Shaking my head, I blow my nose again. “I can’t go back to the clinic. I feel like such a failure. I was supposed to be getting financially independent. I was supposed to be finding out who I am. Instead I fell in love with him.” More tears fill my eyes. “I’m such an idiot.”

“To be fair, you were kind of already into him when you took the job.” She reaches for the box of Puffs and hands me another one.