Make Me Yours(69)

Leaning down, I kiss her button nose. “I think you’re beautiful. Sleep now angel.”

She’s asleep curled against my side, and I’m watching the second half of Mulan when a soft tapping sounds on the door. I look up to see Remi peeking his head in. His expression is worried or maybe anxious.

“How’s she doing?”

“Her fever broke. I think it’s just a twenty-four-hour virus.” He nods, and I have an idea. “Do you happen to have an extra stress ball?”

Those dark brows furrow over his pretty eyes, and inwardly I sigh. He’s so handsome.

“I might. Why?”

“I think the reason she likes to play with ketchup packets is the same reason you like squeezing a stress ball. It’s soothing.”

He exhales, dropping his chin. “She scared the shit out of me this morning. This whole day has been just one hit after another.”

“Tell me about it.” I look down at the little angel holding my waist. Her face is so peaceful.

My eyes are still on her when Remi touches my shoulder. Our eyes meet, and his are anguished. “Don’t go, Ruby…” It’s a tortured whisper, and my heart jumps in my chest. “She needs you.”

Then it fizzles right back down again.

She needs me.

Say you need me, Remi… You.

Say you’ll make me yours…

I swallow that emotion away. “Not living here doesn’t mean I won’t see her anymore.”

His brow furrows, and he scrubs his eyes with his fingertips. “Will you at least stay on as her nanny until I can find a replacement?”

The idea of being replaced should not offend me. “What’s wrong with Eleanor?”

She started this whole thing, after all.

“I don’t want her involved. I don’t like how she treated you. I don’t like how she treated either of us.”

Lifting my chin, I give him a nod. “I’ll help with Lillie until you find someone.”

“Thanks.” His expression is dark and he stands slowly, leaning down to kiss his daughter before he leaves.

He pauses on the way up, hovering with his lips just over mine. My heart beats painfully hard in my chest. I hold my breath until he stands completely. Without another word, he goes to the door and leaves us.

I lean back on the pillows as the tears streak down my cheeks.





30





Remi


It’s a punch in the chest to see Ruby holding my daughter so sweetly, taking care of her when she’s sick, making her laugh and slowly helping her regain her strength.

I might not be sure of her feelings for me, but I know she loves Lillie.

It takes her less than half an hour to clear her things out of her room. My daughter follows her whining the whole time, but Ruby assures her repeatedly she’s not far away. She’ll be back every day to drive her to school and to spend the afternoons.

My daughter’s tears are like salt in my already bleeding insides. Everything about this is wrong, but short of tying Ruby up with ropes, I don’t know how to make her stay.

Before she walks out, I put my hand on her shoulder. “I took out the extra cash for New York.” I give her the business envelope, and she looks at it a few moments. “You did the work as Lillie’s nanny. You deserve to be paid.”

Her lips press together and she nods, taking the envelope from me. “I’ll be here Monday morning to take her to preschool.”

“I can take her in the mornings. What if you pick her up and stay with her during the afternoons until dinner?”

She lifts her chin and our eyes meet. Our chemistry is still alive, but it’s tantalizing pain, like the promise of something I desperately want held just out of reach.

“I’m doing half the work. You should adjust my pay to reflect that.”

“Whatever makes you comfortable.”

It’s our last exchange before she’s gone. I scoop up my daughter, and she lays her head on my shoulder, squeezing the striped stress ball I found in one of my drawers.

“Feeling stressed-out, peanut?”

“Why did Ruby have to go?”

“She felt like it would be better for all of us if she didn’t live here anymore.”

Lillie lifts her head and looks me in the eyes. “I don’t think it’s better for me if she’s not here anymore. Do you think it’s better?”

“No, princess. I don’t think it’s better at all.”

My daughter wiggles to get down, and I set her on her feet. She walks slowly with her little shoulders slumped to the patio, and I climb the flight of stairs to my office with the same posture. This big ole house feels too huge, too empty now.

Eleanor left on Friday. I would feel guilty about it, but she moved quickly into the condo I secured for her. I almost feel like she expected it. Or she welcomed it. I don’t really care.

I’ve communicated briefly with her on her requests to see Lillie. I’m furious at her, but I don’t want to hurt my daughter. So far, I agreed she can pick Lillie up for church tomorrow morning. I don’t feel much like attending.

Standing in front of my computer I see unread emails from Stellan. A few more emails wait from Stephen and a rising entrepreneur he thinks I should meet. I hover my mouse over them and think about work and why I’m doing all of this.