Love At First Glance (Love at Firsts #1)(63)

“Why didn't you mention anything before? It's been a while since that happened.”

“Because every time we were around each other or talking, we’d end up fighting about it or about Valentine.”

“You’re f*cked up.” I shake my head.

“You’re only noticing it now?”

“No.” I sigh.

“I got a tattoo.” He rubs his face. It takes me a second to realize what he’s saying.

“Show me.” I say, my voice trembling. I know already what he had tattooed.

He gets up and peels off his plaster to reveal something I never thought I'd ever see. When we were younger we each drew half of a butterfly; I drew the dark side and he drew the angelic side of it. We always joked how we’d get each other's half tattooed at one point, but never did. Now, looking at what he’s just revealed a tsunami of emotions wash over me. A dark and tormented evil half butterfly now covers his left ribs. I look between his face and the tattoo, feeling utterly speechless. “Say something,” he whispers, taking my hand.

“I…I don’t know what to say Spencer.”

“Do you feel anything for me?” He squeezes my hand.

“I…”

“I get it.” He lets go of my hand. “You can let yourself out.” He walks away from me. I feel my heart ripping into pieces.

“Wait.” He stops in the hallway. I walk to him and turn him face me. “I’m more confused than a chameleon in a bag of skittles right now, but I l-”

“Yes?” Spencer asks expectantly.

“Oh God.” I sigh and face plant his chest, breaking down crying.

“Haven, what’s wrong?” I shake my head and cry into his chest as I realize the full impact of what’s going on. It’s getting too much for me to handle and all of the emotions I’ve been hiding for these past couple of weeks finally surface. “Good tears?” He asks and I nod. “Thank f*ck!” He squeezes me and kisses my head.

Yes, they are good tears, but I’d be lying if I weren’t scared of losing my everything.

We stand in each other’s embrace for what seems like forever. When we pull away he looks at me, with both happiness and fear in his eyes.

“I didn’t think you’d ever feel the same.” He kisses my forehead.

“Same back at you.” I chuckle nervously and wipe away my tears.

“I can’t believe this.” He smiles and walks me to the couch before sitting down and pulling me on top of him. “How long have you known?”

“Probably around the same time as you, I knew I wanted more, but I only really realized that I was in love with you a couple of days ago.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Because you were acting like a dick and I didn’t want to ruin our friendship.”

“I know, I was scared of that too. So much to lose,” he whispers, more to himself.

“That’s why I stayed quiet. You’re my everything. If I lost you I wouldn’t have anyone.”

“We’ll make it through. I promise.” He smiles his dazzling smile and I melt.

“Oh, so sure of yourself, huh?” I poke his chest.

“Yes. We know each other’s good, bad and ugly and I still love you. We now know why we've been fighting so much and acting strange.”

“Hey! You were the one acting strange.” I glare at him.

“No. You were too.”

“Huh, how so?” I look at him confused.

“You were more open, confident and outgoing.”

“Those are good things, you were an ass.”

“I know. I just thought it was Dickwad who was making you like that.”

“No, it was you and the realization of how I felt.” I shrug.

“I still can’t believe it.” He beams.

“Neither can I. What were the odds?” I chuckle.

“Everybody seemed to know we’d end up together.”

“True, worst is that Matt told me earlier how you felt but I couldn’t comprehend it, or maybe I just couldn’t bring myself to believe it.”

“What made you fully understand?” He asks as he brushes a strand of hair behind my ear.

“The tattoo.” I sigh happily and look at it again.

“I told you I’d get it done one day. I always keep my promises.”

“I see that. When did you get it done?”

“This afternoon.”

“After you wrote me that awful letter.” I frown.

“If I couldn’t have you in my life, then I figured this way I’d have a part of you with me forever.” He shrugs.

“You’re f*cking insane, but that’s kinda romantic.” I smile and cuddle into him but immediately back off when he winces.

“It’s a bit sore.”

“Sorry.” I grin sheepishly. “It’s beautiful though.” I sigh happily.

“She really did it justice.” He smiles and looks at me.

“She?” I raise my eyebrow.

“Oh shit, here we go.” He chuckles and rubs his face.

“Yes, so, tell me about her.” I press him, playfully.

“She is the one who’s done all of my tattoos.”