Four Week Fiance 2(38)

I’d left TJ’s house that morning, anxious to get away from him and to see Nonno. Though a part of me had hoped that he would say, “Don’t go. Spend the day with me, Mila,” but of course he hadn’t said those words. He hadn’t said anything and I’d left and told him I’d see him later and he’d told me to enjoy my day with Nonno and to make it special. I’d smiled, but I hadn’t been able to look him in the eyes. I hadn’t wanted him to see the heartbreak in my irises.

I resisted the urge to check my phone again once I hit a stoplight. I knew that there wouldn’t be any texts from TJ. I hadn’t heard my phone beeping. He didn’t care. He wasn’t thinking of me as much as I was thinking of him. That didn’t matter to me though. As soon as I was stopped, I grabbed my phone and quickly punched in my code to check my messages. My heart fell as I saw no new messages. It wasn’t a shock, but just another confirmation that I was a sad case. This was the fifth time since I’d left TJ’s home that I was checking my messages, praying and hoping for a sign that maybe—just maybe—he could love me back. But there was nothing. I continued driving to Nonno’s house and I allowed myself five more minutes to cry before I was going to have to stop. I didn’t want to show up to Nonno’s house with a red nose and swollen eyes from all my tears.

I turned on the radio to see if I could cheer myself up with some new music, when Adele’s new single, “Hello”, started playing. I sang along and felt the tears streaming once again. I wasn’t sure why I allowed myself to listen to sad songs, when I was suffering from heartache. I knew it wasn’t smart, but somehow it made me feel better. It made me remember that other people had gone through heartache as well and still ended up okay on the other side. My stomach felt empty as I sang along and drove. I wasn’t sure that I was going to feel better once this was all over. I wasn’t sure it was smart to even stay in this relationship with TJ. How could I keep giving myself to him? Sleeping with him? Loving him? Knowing that every moment with him made me love him more and made him feel like I was still nothing.

I turned onto the interstate and switched the radio off. I needed to dry my eyes and pretend to be happy for my meeting with Nonno. It always made him upset to see me hurting.

***

Nonno opened the front door and pulled me into his arms. “Mila, so good to see you, mi cara.”

“You too, Nonno.” I kissed his cheek. “I’m sorry I haven’t called or seen you in a while. I’ve just been preoccupied with TJ and the engagement.”

“I understand.” He smiled at me graciously as we walked into his home. I smiled as I saw that he had an old photo album out on the couch, and I walked over to it.

“Looking at photos of Nonna?” I asked him, smiling at how nostalgic he was.

“Every single day.” He nodded and walked over to me and we sat down together on the couch and looked at the photos.

“She was so beautiful,” I said as I picked up a photo of Nonna that must have been taken when she was 18. She was scowling at the camera, her long black hair flying behind her as she stood there with a basket in her hands. I laughed at the photo and Nonno took it from me and held it close to his eyes.

“This day, your Nonna, she was mad at me.” He chuckled. “She was mad because she’d seen me talking to another girl. So when I came up to the camera, she told me to get away from her.”

“Oh Nonno.” I looked at him in surprise and smiled. “Were you flirting with the other girl?”

“Yes.” He laughed. “I wanted to make her jealous.” He looked over at me and winked. “She’d been talking to Alberto, the banker’s son, the day before and I knew he had intentions to get to know her better. I needed to make sure she knew that she liked me.”

“And so you flirted with someone else?” I said and shook my head.

“The games of love have been around for a long time, my dear.” He laughed and put the photo back in the album carefully. We went through the pages and I stared at all the old photos of Nonno and Nonna as they’d gotten together. I stopped him from turning the page as I looked down and saw a photo I didn’t remember seeing before. It was a photo of Nonno and Nonna and she was staring at the camera and he was staring at her. Even though it was only a photo, it was easy to see the love and devotion in his eyes as he gazed at her tenderly. And even Nonna was grinning into the camera softly, her eyes looking bright. There was a magic in the photo, an air of love. It was clear to see and it made me shiver at the power of the shot.

“This is beautiful, Nonno,” I said to him and he took the photo from me and held it tightly.

“She was beautiful,” he almost whispered as he sat back. “My love, my amore,” he said as he stared at the photo. “That day, the day this photo was taken, that was the day that I knew your Nonna and I would be together forever, that nothing would ever part us. That was the day I stopped worrying that she would meet someone else.

“Oh?” I asked him, my heart pounding. I was starting to feel emotional. I sat there wishing that TJ would feel that way about me and that made me feel guilty. I didn’t want to turn every situation into one where I was thinking about TJ.

“Your Nonna wrote me a poem. She read it to me right before that photo was taken,” he said and looked at me, his eyes looking far away as he remembered the moment. “It was so unusual and I hadn’t expected it. I was the romantic in the relationship and even then I was far from a Romeo.” He smiled and then sighed.