Finding Carly (SEAL Team Hawaii #5)(46)

Jag felt a pang of apprehension move through him at her announcement. “I’m not that interesting.”

“Nope,” she said with a shake of her head. “You don’t get to decide that. You have to tell me everything and I’ll decide. And for the record…you have nothing to worry about, I’m fascinated by you already.”

“I’d rather talk about you. I don’t know that much about you either. Where you grew up, if you were a shy kid, how you ended up out here in Hawaii.”

Carly smiled. “And I’m happy to tell you all of that. I just…I’ve gotten too comfortable here, Jag.”

“What does that mean? You want to leave?” he asked in alarm.

“No!” she exclaimed.

Jag relaxed a fraction. “Good, because I like having you here.”

“I like being here. I like being your friend, Jag…but I want more. And I feel as if we’ve already fallen into a routine. You…you haven’t even kissed me since that one day.”

Jag’s arms tightened. He was well aware that he hadn’t kissed her again. He wanted to, always, but the truth was, that first kiss had knocked him on his ass. He’d also wanted to make sure he didn’t pressure Carly in any way when it came to being intimate.

“What are you thinking about so hard?” she asked gently. “You do that all the time, go into your head, and I can’t help but wonder what you’re thinking about.”

“Nothing important,” Jag said.

Carly frowned.

“I’m sorry,” he apologized, knowing he was trivializing something that was obviously important to her. “I’m not used to talking about my feelings. I guess I’m a typical guy in that sense.”

“That’s okay. But, Jag, you can talk to me about anything.”

Jag nodded. He actually knew that, and a part of him was desperate to tell her his deepest, darkest secret, but he’d kept it to himself for so long, he wasn’t sure he could talk about it now.

Forcing his thoughts away from that dark place within him, he growled quietly, “You want more kisses, angel?”

Shyly, she nodded.

“You like me touching you?”

She nodded again.

“Holding you at night?”

“Yes.”

“You want more, all you have to do is tell me, or show me, whichever is more comfortable for you. I haven’t touched you more intimately because I never want to pressure you. If at any point you don’t like what I’m doing, or how I’m touching you, all you have to do is tell me no. I’ll honor that. I swear.”

“I know you will,” Carly said, licking her lips as she stared up at him.

“How long does the lasagna need to cook?”

“At least for another thirty minutes,” she told him.

Without a word, Jag loosened his hold on her and grabbed one of her hands. He immediately headed for the couch in the other room.

Carly giggled as she followed.

Jag knew he should be on the phone calling the detective, or Baker, or something. He wasn’t thrilled with the fact that Carly ran into both Luke and Beau today. It was as if seeing Jeremiah at Duke’s the other day had somehow opened some Karmic wormhole. He wouldn’t be at all surprised if she started seeing even more people associated with her ex now. That always seemed to be how these things worked.

But at the moment, all he could think of was the fact that Carly wanted more kisses. He was eager to give her exactly what she wanted. And to confirm the chemistry they’d felt with that first kiss wasn’t a fluke.

He fell onto the couch and pulled Carly with him, then eased her to her back, hovering over her. Carly smiled at him.

“This okay?” he asked.

“It’d be better if you were actually kissing me,” she teased.

Jag took a moment to visually drink her in. Her hair was spread around her head like a halo. Her lips were bare of makeup, but still a rosy pink. As he stared, she licked her lips once more. Then her hand moved to the back of his neck and she gently tugged him downward.

He let her take the lead…and the second her lips touched his, Jag knew he was a goner. He’d never felt this way before, like if he stopped touching her, he’d die. It was a melodramatic thought, and so strange for him, but not unwelcome.

Carly was so different. Jag knew that down to the marrow of his bones. He’d kill anyone who dared to fucking touch one hair on her head. It was a vicious sentiment, considering what they were doing right that second, devouring each other as if they’d never get enough. But Jag knew it was true.

The woman beneath him was precious. She was his. He’d bend over backward to be the man she needed him to be. The problem was, Jag knew she could do so much better than him. On the outside, he seemed like a catch. Inside, he knew otherwise.

For now, he planned to make sure Carly knew what an incredible, desirable woman she was. But when the day came that she realized how broken he was, he’d give her up without a fuss, if necessary. He only wanted her to be happy, and if that meant watching her walk away, so be it.

In this moment, he was going to be selfish.

Time had no meaning as they made out on his couch. Jag lost himself in her. Her soft body under his hard one, her tongue twining with his, the feel of her breasts against his chest, her soft moans…she was perfect.