Falling Down(37)

"A what?"
"A Tijanette."
"What the f*ck is that?"
I laugh. "Okay, something you might not know about me. I love to read. I read every day in my spare time. If I'm not working, I generally read all day and lounge by the pool or whatever. I just--read. It's my escape."
"Okay, what does that have to do with Raisinettes?"
I laugh out loud, so loud and hard that I snort. "Not Raisinettes,Tijanettes. You see one of my favorite author's names is Tijan and her fans or street team is called Tijanettes. I love her stories and there are a couple I haven't read yet, so I'll download it to my Kindle, grab a bottle of wine, and lounge on the oversized sofa with a pillow and blanket because Sera probably set the air conditioning too low and I'll freeze my ass off."
"What movie are you going to watch?"
I shrug. "A chick flick probably."
He cringes. "Well then. Maybe when we've wrapped up everything with the video tomorrow, you'll let me take you out to dinner."
While I'm mulling this over, Jesse starts his car and pulls around to the front of the hotel. I look at him, at the gorgeousness that is Jesse Kingston, and I know what I'm going to do. The potential for heartbreak is high. The potential for love is low. But it's Jesse. I lied to him earlier. I did feel something when we met in Chicago. The zing. The electricity. The heat. It's all still there, stronger than ever and getting stronger every minute he's near me.
"Alright, Jesse. Dinner it is."
He nods, seeming a bit surprised, then a genuine smile blooms across his beautiful face. I can't bring myself to smile. I'm afraid. I'm very, very afraid.
"We'll work the details out tomorrow. We've already exchanged digits so you can call me anytime."
"And you can call me. Convenient how that worked out for you."
He chuckles. "I admit it. I wanted your number."
I smirk. "And now you have it. Do you know how many squealing fangirls would kill for this phone number?"
"Don't even think about it."
I laugh. "I wouldn't."
"Look, Lucy. I'm sorry. I didn’t mean to bring up shit that upsets you. It's just, I don't know. I feel like I need to explain."
"You don't. As I said, you owe me nothing."
"Maybe not but it feels like I do. Anyway, you're going to have guys in your band and I don't know how Sera is or if you'll get another girl, but I know for sure the guys are going to get wild for a while. Hell, you might."
I nod. "I doubt I will but I'm anticipating others will. There will be no skanks on the bus. If they want to f*ck skanks either they f*ck them backstage or in a motel or hotel when we're stopped long enough, but I am not going to listen to groupie giggling all f*cking night."
"Wow. That was a lot of f*cks and skanks. Hot button, Luce? "
"Fucking yes it is. These women are pathetic. Okay, not all of them, but a lot. See, I'll be as straight up with you as you were with me, Jesse. I would have gone backstage with you or wherever to f*ck you, I admit that." Both of his brows raise at this admission. "But, here's the difference between me and a lot of the others. While I would be with you, that's it for me. I wouldn't go to the next band and f*ck that singer or guitarist or drummer. I wouldn't f*ck anyone else from your band. You get what I'm saying? I love the entire band of Falling Down, they guys are seriously hot, but while I'm their fan, I'm mostly yours. You were inspiring to me when I was growing up and I crushed on you big time back then. So, while a lot of others aren't discriminate, they just want a band member, it doesn't matter who, because whoever they get is famous and that means they can brag to their friends or whatever they're using them for, that's not me. Now I'm not talking about the women who might be young or for whatever reason are in a rebellious stage--I'm talking about the ones who make that their life. That's pathetic. Where's their self respect? They use you all and while you think it's okay because you get to get laid regularly and use them in return, I just can't think it's okay. Everyone has a right to their own opinion."