Disillusioned (Swept Away, #2)(3)
“I said this situation was hard, not me.” His voice was soft and provocative, trying to lure me back to him.
“I never said you were hard.” I looked back at him, my nerve almost failing when I looked into his eyes and saw the gentle, teasing Jakob I had gotten to know on the island.
“But you were hoping I was, weren’t you?” he teased me again and stepped forward. My heart stopped as he grabbed a hold of the railing in front of him.
“Don’t come over here,” I whispered, my voice cracking. “Please.”
“Why are you scared of me, Bianca? You know I would never hurt you.” His eyes looked sad and I wondered at his being such a great actor. It was almost ironic, with me being a movie critic. I’d witnessed the greatest performance live and in person, but I hadn’t even known I was being played.
“How could you make love to me?” My voice dropped and my legs tingled as I thought about the way he had kissed and caressed me just minutes before. My skin felt warm as I remembered the things he had done with his tongue, and I sighed as my body betrayed me. Trust him, it said. Let him hold you and keep you warm. I closed my eyes and took a couple of deep breaths. I needed to focus. I was like Julia Roberts in Sleeping with the Enemy. I needed to be on high alert. I couldn’t allow him to twist the truth and turn me against myself.
“I made love to you because you’re beautiful. I made love to you because I couldn’t not make love to you. In fact, I want to make love to you right now.” He smiled and then looked at my chest suggestively. “Come, dear Bianca, let’s just go back to bed.”
“Just tell me two things.” I spoke confidently and felt a surge of pride running through my veins as I hid my fear. “Did you know Steve before he showed up on the island with us? And were you really kidnapped?” I waited for his answers, the events of the last week flashing through my mind like a movie on fast-forward.
It felt as if just yesterday I was sitting in the bar with my best friend, Rosie, having a glass of wine. She’d gone to the bathroom and I’d blacked out. The next thing I’d known I was in the back of a car tied up with a strange man. A man who’d turned out to be Jakob. I hadn’t trusted him at first, but he had slowly proven himself to me, and I hadn’t been able to resist my attraction to him. Together we’d worked to figure out why we’d been kidnapped. That was what I’d believed in my heart. We’d both talked about our personal histories. I’d told him about my dad’s death and how I’d thought the rich Bradley family had had something to do with my mother’s death. He’d told me about his mother and her heartache when the man she’d loved hadn’t committed to her. And when Steve had showed up—nefarious, deceitful, smarmy Steve—I’d seen the surprise, shock, and distaste on Jakob’s face.
I thought we’d connected on a deeper level. I’d given myself to him, mind, body, and heart. I’d put my trust and faith in him. Could he have been fooling me all of this time? Could he have done this to me in the first place?
“Bianca, it’s complicated.” He bit his lower lip and his eyes narrowed again. I could see his tension in the way his shoulders were hunched up. His fists were clenched and I could see a vein throbbing in his forehead.
I took a step toward him, feeling brave in pursuit of the truth. “Why so worried? Angry that I know the truth?”
“What truth do you think you know?” He threw his hands up, and I could see his palms were still roughened from his time on the island cracking coconuts and carrying wood. “You need to trust me,” he pleaded.
“How can I trust you? You lied to me and even now you’re not telling me anything.”
“What you think you know about Mattias—well, it’s complicated.”
“You mean what I think I know about you?”
“It’s complicated, Bianca. You need to just trust me for now, please.”
“Did you have any involvement with my kidnapping?” I asked softly, and stared at him, our chests rising in unison as we stood mere yards away from one another.
“Give me your hand,” he said softly, and stretched his arms as forward as they could go.
“Why?” I shook my head, but didn’t step back. I suppose I was waiting for an answer that would make everything clearer. Something that would show me Jakob wasn’t involved in this whole mess.
“Please.”
I found myself reaching my hand forward slowly. I regretted my decision about a second later.
His fingers squeezed mine tightly and I gasped at the dart of pain that surged through me at his tight grip. “I’m sorry,” he whispered as he stared at me from the other balcony. “I didn’t mean to hurt you, Bianca.”
“Then let go of me.” I tried to pull it away from him again, but he wouldn’t release me. “Please.”
“Bianca.” His voice was hoarse. “I can’t let you go.”
“Why did you lie to me?” I shook my head and stared into his eyes. For a few seconds we were back on the island. For a few seconds it was just us against the world. For a few seconds my heart stopped beating and I was caught up in the magnetism that attracted us to each other. As I stared into his deep blue eyes, I felt a gamut of emotions: pain, anger, sadness, and something akin to love. My heart broke as I saw the same emotions reflected back at me.