Chasing Abby(82)

I hug the stack of papers to my chest as I stare at the carpet. “I wish Caleb could read it with me. He… He really loved you guys.”
She wraps her arm around my shoulders and squeezes me. “We loved him too. And we love you. It hurts me so much to see you in so much pain.” She strokes my hair and I sigh as she wipes the tears from my cheeks. “I just need you to promise me one thing.”
“What?”
“Promise me you’ll write the last chapter of that book. The one where Abby realizes what a beautiful second chance at life she’s been given and she uses it to get her happily ever after.”
I nod and she takes me into her arms, holding me tightly until my body stops trembling. When she finally lets go, I look into her eyes and, for just a brief millisecond, I see her as a seven-year-old girl. If she could survive losing her whole family, like Caleb, then I can survive this. It’s time to open that email.


Chapter 34 - Abby

Four months later

I SLIDE INTO THE driver’s seat of my new white Volvo and the door closes and locks on its own. I press the start button, then I begin entering the Cary address in the navigation system. I confirm the destination and my self-driving car sets off on the short journey from my house to my other house.
I had originally wanted to call them House #1 and House #2, but Junior thought it was so funny that their house was #2. He certainly didn’t need any more material for his arsenal. So I settled on “my house” and “my other house.”
I mostly stay at my house, but I have spent a couple of weeks at the house in Cary. And I even convinced my parents to spend Christmas with the Knights and the Pollocks. I like to see it as pulling double-duty, making sure Caleb’s heart is always surrounded by family.
But today, I’m headed to Cary, in the car Chris insisted he had to buy for me, for a very different reason. It’s been four months since I opened Caleb’s final email to me. And today would have been Caleb’s nineteenth birthday. Today, I’m finally going to fulfill Caleb’s final request.
When I opened that email four months ago, I thought my parents were going to have to take me back to the hospital. My heart—Caleb’s heart—was pounding so hard just from seeing the words “Hey, sunshine!” But I managed to calm myself down and read on. And what I found was a very short email containing the log-in information for Caleb’s YouTube account. In the email, he explained how he had some private videos he wanted me to see, and how he would leave it up to me how I wanted to use those videos.
Immediately, I thought to myself, “Caleb is giving me what I want. He’s giving me a chance to hear his voice one more time.” And I didn’t know if I was ready for that. So I saved the username and password and tucked them away for another day. A stronger day.
Two weeks ago, on New Year’s Day, I made a resolution to be stronger. To do more with the awesome gift Caleb bestowed upon me. And the first thing I did was log into that YouTube account.
There are six videos in all. Each one is of him sitting on the stool in his bedroom with his guitar in his lap. He introduces himself and talks about the song he’s about to play. The first video I click on is titled “Chasing Abby.” And the first time I hear his voice, it’s like a kick in the chest.
“I wrote this song after you ran away from me in the mall and you hid in that shoe store. Don’t worry. It has nothing to do with malls or shoes. And I’m not actually going to sing the song. The lyrics are in the description, down there.” He points downward and I resist the urge to reach out and touch his hand on the screen. “I’m kind of hoping you’ll sing while I play, ’cause you know my voice is shit. But you sing like an angel. So, yeah, here it goes. ‘Chasing Abby.’”