Chasing Abby(84)

“Mm-hmm,” the hairstylist agrees with me as she coils the cord around a curling iron.
“Oh, who cares?” Abby protests. “I’m not the star of today’s show.”
“I beg to differ,” I say, handing Caleb to her. “I believe it’s your name plastered on all the concert posters.”
She smiles as she rubs noses with Caleb and he laughs. “You’ll agree with me after you see the show.”
She plays with Caleb for a few more minutes, then she heads into the bathroom to warm up her vocal folds. She insists on doing this in the bathroom. She thinks it’s rude to do it in a roomful of people.
She comes out of the bathroom a few minutes later, as I’m walking Caleb up and down the narrow space running along the center of the trailer. She sits back down in the makeup chair and she suddenly begins to tear up.
“Honey, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” she insists, grabbing a tissue off the makeup counter and dabbing at the corners of her eyes. “I just had a bad vision that I messed up the performance and I let Caleb down.”
“Oh, Abby. You could never let him down. Wherever he is, he is so proud of you.” I pull Caleb up into my arms and settle him down on my hip. “You’ve done more with his heart than I’m sure he ever imagined you would do. And I’m sure whatever you have planned for today is going to go perfectly. And if you mess up, I’m sure Caleb will be looking down on you, pointing and laughing.”
She lets out a puff of laughter as she wipes her eyes. “You’re right. He’d be happy just to see me sitting here talking to you. Thank you.”
“You don’t have to thank me.”
“Yes, I do. I have to thank you. Without you, my parents wouldn’t be standing in the front row tonight. Without Chris, I wouldn’t even be on that stage. I love you, Mom.”
“I never get tired of hearing you call me that. I love you, sweetheart.”
I lean in to kiss her forehead, then I remember I’m wearing lipstick. But when I pull back, Caleb has a chunk of Abby’s hair in his hand.
“Oh, no.”
I unfurl his fat fingers from around her hair and she smiles as I step back. Then she reaches down and grabs Caleb’s hand to walk him up and down the narrow corridor, as I was doing a few minutes ago.
I wish I could tell Abby how much Chris longs to hear her call him Dad. But I know she’ll do it when she’s ready. She and Chris have spent most of their time together working. I imagine it must be difficult for her to separate all the roles he plays in her life.
As if he can hear my thoughts, Chris enters just as the makeup artist arrives to touch up Abby’s makeup. But Abby ignores her. And she’s too engrossed in Caleb to see Chris. But Chris’s eyes are locked on her, and only one thought crosses my mind.
I don’t think there’s anyone in this world who loves Abby as fiercely as he does. And you don’t need to hold the title Dad to be someone’s father. Just as you don’t need to be someone’s father to hold the title Dad. But when your Dad and your father are both Chris Knight, you can be sure that you’re the luckiest girl on the planet.



IT WAS DIFFICULT for Claire to accept that I need to be on the road with Abby this summer. Especially since her forty-first birthday is coming in August, which is also the twenty-fifth anniversary of our first kiss. But she claims she’s okay with it now. As long as I’m back before the New Year, our twentieth wedding anniversary.
Where did the time go?
There were so many years, so many endless nights, where it seemed the time would never pass by fast enough to make it to Abby’s eighteenth birthday. Now, two years after she walked through my front door, I just want time to slow down. I’m afraid I’ll wake up tomorrow and thirty years will have passed, and I’ll be scratching my head, wishing I had done more.