Carnage: Book #1 The Story Of Us (Volume 1)(91)

He rakes both of his hands through his hair, then drags them down his face. “We had bought a place in Shenfield, not far from where your Mum and Dad are now. The first thing I noticed were that the gates were open, Chantelle would never have left them open. I had them put in especially for her and the baby’s security, then when I pulled up outside, I could see that the front doors had been smashed in, I went running in, calling out her name, I found her in the bedroom, she was tied to a chair, blind folded, with an alarm clock ticking to her, she’d… ” He shook his head, not the little head shake he does when I piss him off but a no, no, no kind of head shakes.

“She’d thrown up all over herself and was totally confused, I untied her and laid her on the bed, then called for an ambulance, she hadn’t been touched, not raped, not beaten, what they had done was terrify her. Her blood pressure was dangerously high, they delivered my son by emergency caesarean, and he was still born. Chantelle started fitting on the operating table, her blood pressure was so high that it was causing seizures, eventually all of her organs shut down and she died, she died, my baby died a large part of me died. I should’ve died, not them, they were good and pure and innocent but they died because of me.”

He has tears but he doesn’t appear to be crying, he’s just talking, telling me his story, with tears rolling down his cheeks. I go to him and sit myself in his lap, curl myself into his big body. He holds me, wraps his arms around me and kisses into my hair. “The man I shot yesterday, he was one of their firm, he didn’t come to my house that day, if he had he would have been long dead but he was known to us as one of the faces causing us trouble in the clubs, then he got banged up and I just let it go. I had no idea he was even out so yesterday, yesterday he finally got what was coming to him.”

I sit quietly comprehending all that he’s told me. “It was the Riley’s then, who’d come to your house.”

“Yeah, we caught up with one of their firm later that night, didn’t take much to get him to grass, but he did; all of those involved had done a runner over to Spain, all trying to lay low, they got in touch, pleaded that they had no idea it would cause her blood pressure to go up, they didn’t want any trouble, they were sorry.” I feel him shrug his shoulders. “I’m a nasty bastard Georgia, I’ve done lots of bad things in my life but I have rules, most people I deal with, your Dad and your uncle, your brother, we all live by the same rules, you do not involve people’s families, whatever grief you have with someone, you do not involve family, especially not pregnant wives.”

He sighs deeply. “They got what was coming to them, I didn’t have to do anything, everyone else was so disgusted, so appalled at what they had done, that as soon as they surfaced, they were taken out, all but one, Chris Riley but I found him, I found him and I took a lot of pleasure in dealing with him. Terry was the last on the list, he’s lucky I was with you and in such a good mood yesterday, I let him off lightly.”

Fuck!

My Dad, my Uncles, my brother, my family are all involved in this, in this lifestyle and I had no idea. I sit silently in his lap, my head resting on his bare chest, he has one arm around my waist, the other wrapped around my shoulder, while traces patterns over my back with his fingertips. I have no idea what to say. What do you say? Is this a conversation that anyone, has sat naked and had before I wonder?

“Would you like me to go?” He looks down at me as I look up at him. Do I? I suddenly feel incredibly tired again and just want to go back to sleep.

“I don’t know, do you think I should want you to go?”