Breathe In (Just Breathe, #1)(78)
The six of us stop waiting for Maggie and Henry after ten more minutes and commence the movie. In less than ten minutes, Jared and Nathan have eaten three-fourths of their bowl of popcorn and I only get two handfuls. I shift on the couch to where my legs rest across Jared, but my head is now on Sadie’s belly so I can reach the popcorn Joe has resting on his lap. Maggie and Henry finally join us just as I reach to grab another round of popcorn over my head.
At some point, I cross my cardigan and arms over my chest when I notice my protruding nipples. Seconds later, I feel something being draped over me. I look up to find Joe placing a blanket that was on the back of the couch across my upper body. We smile when our eyes meet. As I shift to cover myself better with the blanket, I feel Joe helping by pull my hair to the side when I lift my head. His fingers kiss my skin upon contact. With everyone’s attention on the movie, Joe discretely glides his fingers up and down the side of my neck, causing my body to quiver in pleasure. I convince myself not to look at him, but soon I’m compelled. He returns the glance with a smile as his fingers never falter their movement, even when I look away. I notice that when someone moves or shifts, Joe’s hand freezes in place like he doesn’t want to be seen.
When the movie is over, the three couples rush to their rooms mumbling shouts of goodnight. Sex-capades time. I, on the other hand, take note that Anna is nowhere to be found and begin taking the glasses and bowls into the kitchen.
Joe laughs at me and comments when I pass him on my first trip to the kitchen. “You can’t help yourself, can you?”
I scrunch my nose at him.
Placing the dishes down and rolling up my sleeves, I hear Joe enter the kitchen not long after me. He brings in the rest of the bowls and glasses as I combine all of the remaining popcorn into one bowl and snap on its lid before placing the empty ones in the dishwasher. I wash the glasses by hand, since I know that they are crystal and then wipe down the counter.
Just as I head towards the living room with a damp sponge in hand, Joe tenderly snags my arm. “Leave it. It’ll make Anna feel needed. Important.”
I nod my understanding to his statement and replace the sponge in its proper place. I turn looking for a towel and am meet with Joe standing in front of me holding one. With a smile and diligent precision, Joe proceeds to gradually dry each one of my hands before tossing the towel on the countertop.
With our eyes locked, he delicately steps forward, compressing his body into mine at the waist. With my arms already crossed in front of me, he affectionately runs his hands up and down my arms from my shoulders to my elbows. Joe lowers his forehead to mine, pressing ever so lightly. I shake my head gingerly in opposition. He cups my chin despite my protest.
“No,” I whisper, placing my hands onto his forearms.
“Please,” he begs, regardless of my objection.
“No,” I stay firm in my conviction.
“Please,” his voice cracks as he reaches for my lips.
Pulling my head away last second, I say, “I can’t.”
“Why,” he pleads.
I wish I could tell him why, but right now I’m not even sure. How can something that feels so good, be so scary at the same time?
“We can only be friends,” I tell him.
Joe groans as he places his forehead back on mine rocking it. We stand like this for several minutes before he wraps me in his arms, holding me like he never wants to let go. I lightly place my hands on his hips as we stand motionless and not talking. All I can hear is the sound of our breathing. I could fall asleep like this.
Wake up, Emma my brain shouts. Shit. I’m doing the one thing I said I can’t do. I’m letting him in. This needs to stop.
Jerking away suddenly, I call to Sadie with trembling words and she follows me. I stand in Joe’s bedroom contemplating what to do as I reprimand myself for allowing things to go the way they did.
“Do you need anything?” Joe questions, snapping me out of my trance.
I shudder at the sound of his voice not expecting it. “No. Thank you.” I turn to face him and he’s already within inches of me.
Placing his left hand on my face with his fingers wrapped behind my neck, Joe tells me, “I’ll be in the den if you need me.” Before I say anything, his lips fall upon my right cheek. “I won’t stop wanting you, beautiful.” He scans me for a reaction, and I’m not sure what I give him as he kisses my forehead again.
Joe stops in the doorway and before leaving, bids, “Goodnight, beautiful.”
“Goodnight, Joe.”
Seventeen
As I attempt to lift my heavy eyelids, I discover a hazy darkness surrounding me. Blinking slowly several times, my half-opened eyes won’t focus to give me any clear indication of what’s around me and where the blurry, flashing lights above are coming from. My body feels heavy. Still unable to open my eyes all the way, I perceive that I’m laying down somewhere. A cool dampness near my left cheek reveals itself as a slight gust of air brushes past my face. Sliding my right arm up the side of my body like a snake, my fingers creep to my lips. Drool — or, at least I hope so.
Two large and oddly shaped figures materialize in front of me. They are so close, only a foot or two away. Voices suddenly emanate from the now more defined silhouettes. Their speech sounds muffled and trails off into the distance even as I try to concentrate on their words. Who are they? What are they saying? Why can’t I understand them? One of the voices almost sounds feminine.