Beholden (The Belonging Duet, #2)(10)

The darkness returns and then the light takes over, my vision blurs. I keep my eyes closed.

I’m not ready to go … to lose everything and everyone. As much as I’d like to live with no guilt and no remorse anymore, I can’t leave them all.

So once again, I find the fight I have inside of me. The part of me I rely on when I have to find a way. I’m about to use everything I have left—if I can’t get through this black there’ll be no going back.

“Charge to 80.”

“Clear.”

The electric voltage travels through my body shocking each nerve alive.

“Pulse is eighty,” a female voice says.

My chest heaves as I struggle to gain control of my body.

The bright ray returns and it’s blinding. Taking all of the warmth I felt before. Now, I’m cold. There’s pain everywhere, each bone feels like it’s shattering. The f*cking agony is unbearable. Maybe death is the better choice if this is the shit I’m going to go through. Although, if this is death shouldn’t there not be any goddamn pain?

I’m going to miss her. Maybe I can still hear her, touch her, and see her from heaven. She’s my heaven on Earth. She gave me the will to love again, even if it nearly broke us both. She’s my downfall too, but it was worth the pain to have the time we had. I never told her though. I never really explained how much she gave me. I’ll never have that chance now.

No.

Fuck this.

Regret is a motherf*cker.

“Pulse is rising,” another voice says.

My eyes open and I see someone in my face. “Cole. Can you hear me? Get the family in here.” I struggle to figure out what’s going on as my eyes close. “He’s waking up.”

Time passes and I hear a lot of movement, but I can’t focus on anything.

“Jackson, if you can hear us, open your eyes.” I feel something press against my arm and tighten.

Drawing a deep breath I smell vanilla. She’s here. I will my eyes to open as I feel the pain again. The muscles lock in my body as I will them to obey. The light grows brighter and brighter. Fucking hell, this shit hurts.

“Jackson?” I hear Catherine’s voice crack.

I try to move my hand and I feel her soft hand grasp mine. I felt that. All of it. I can feel her skin.

Closing my eyes again, I try to adjust to the light. I’m awake—alive. Tilting my head to the side, I open my eyes and look at her for the first time.

Breathtaking.

That’s the only word I can think of. She’s beautiful. Even with her puffy eyes and quivering lips—she takes my breath away.





“Hi,” I say softly with tears blurring my vision. He’s awake. He’s alive. A week of wonder and fear, somehow he fought through it all.

Jackson looks around confused as his heart rate starts to accelerate on the monitor. I wipe the happy tears and try to reassure him by placing my hand against his cheek.

My throat croaks as I try to get my emotions under control. “Shhh … don’t try to talk.” His brow furrows as I speak. “You’re okay, baby. You’re in Germany at the hospital.” I reach out and smooth his brow, the desire to touch him is too great. His eyes close as my fingers float across his skin.

When his blue-green eyes open again, they latch on to mine and the emotion shines through. Fear, love, and regret all mashed up. I’ve missed those eyes.

“Catherine …” Jackson tries to speak but it’s strained.

I lean close and press my lips against his rough cheek. The feel of his skin against mine causes my heart to race. He’s really awake and he said my name. “I’m here. Just relax,” I try to reassure him. “It’s going to be—”

Before I can finish, the doctor draws our attention to him. “Mr. Cole, I’m Dr. Allison. Welcome back. You gave us quite a scare. I’m going to look you over real quick, okay?”

Jackson nods but doesn’t try to speak again.

Dr. Allison starts assessing him. “Okay, Jackson. Your heart rate is steady and stable. Blood pressure is a little low, but it’s expected. How do you feel?” he asks.

Jackson’s strong hand wraps around mine and he gives me a small squeeze. He swallows and winces. “Water?”

“Sure, you can have a little water. I need you to tell me what you last remember,” Dr. Allison states in a no-nonsense way.

After he takes a sip, he finally speaks. “I d-don’t.” He looks around and lets out a huff. “How l-long?”

“You’ve been unconscious for eight days. Do you have any recollection of how you arrived here?”

Jackson closes his eyes and shakes his head. “I remember the HELO and the sniper.” His eyes open as he grips the blanket looking around. “Mark?”

I grasp his hand and he relaxes a little. “He’s fine. He’ll be here soon. I can call him now,” I say looking for my phone.

“No.” Jackson tightens his grip. “Am I o-okay?” He asks the doctor apprehensively.

“Your injuries were quite severe and you had a few complications during surgery. And extreme blood loss. Your body has endured an intense trauma and I want to keep a close eye on your heart.”

Jackson’s eyes close and his grip loosens a bit.

“Is he going to be okay?” I ask