Within These Walls (Within These Walls #1)(46)

“Why? What did you do? Does it involve my mother somehow? Or something embarrassing? Oh God, is it something involving my mother, and it’s embarrassing?”

I let out a chuckle. “No, nothing to do with family members and nothing embarrassing.”

“Okay, shoot.”

“I took a peek at your list today,” I said quickly.

Her eyes grew. “You said it wasn’t embarrassing!”

“It’s not,” I said quickly, holding my hands up in defense. “I swear, it was a quick peek, and I didn’t look anywhere near the top. I wanted to surprise you with something, and I couldn’t do that without looking on my own.”

She let out a disgruntled breath. “Promise you didn’t see anything that would make me cringe?”

“There was this one thing that involved whipped cream…” I started, trying to keep a straight face.

When her startled face flew up to mine, I couldn’t contain the laughter that came spilling out.

“I’m kidding!”

She playfully slapped my arm and rolled her eyes.

“I held your hair back while you were sick, and I nursed you back to health. You’ll have to do a hell of a lot more than letting me see a notebook full of secret wishes to send me running.”

“Does it bother you that I haven’t told you all of them yet?” she asked, suddenly sobering.

“No, not at all. Don’t take my single glance as anything more than I wanted to give you a special night. I know that notebook is sacred to you, and the fact that you’ve shared any of it with me is an honor. Every time you share another wish or dream from it is like unraveling another layer of you. It helps me get to know the woman I’ve fallen—come to care about so much.”

Coward.

I could admit my feelings to myself and even Dr. Marcus. Hell, I could probably tell anyone passing by in the hallway, but when faced with telling the woman I loved, I’d choked.

Part of me was still roaming that lonely hallway downstairs, mourning the loss of a woman I’d never have, a life I’d never have. As much as I knew it was over and I was moving on, I was scared to do so.

Telling Lailah I loved her was final. There would be no turning back from that moment on, and I knew the second I did so, I’d have to say good-bye to the ghost I’d held on to for far too long.

Two paths and two very different lives were before me.

I needed to find a way to let go of one.

Seventeen: Shakespeare in Love—Lailah

“WE’RE GOING TO what?” I asked again, not quite believing what he’d just said.

“We are going to the movie theater,” he said and then quickly added, “Kind of.”

“How do we kind of go to the movie theater?” I sat up straighter in my bed and watched as he started shuffling through the many bags he’d brought.

“Well, obviously, Dr. Marcus would frown on me kidnapping you and taking you to a real movie,” he said, pulling out what looked like a mini DVD player and setting it on my wooden tray table.

He positioned it toward the wall, angling it just right.

“Since a night at the theater was out, I pulled some strings and managed to borrow this sweet little digital projector from the marketing department, thanks to a favor by HR. So, tonight, we are going to watch a movie of your choice on the big screen—or as big as we can make it,” he added.

He flipped a switch, and a bright white square appeared on the blank wall across from me.

“Oh my gosh, are you kidding me?” I nearly squealed.

After he finished setting up the projector, he turned around and smiled. “I know it’s not quite your number seventy-one, but I figured we could count it as a placeholder until we manage to blow you out of this joint. Then, we could get you to an actual theater, and you can cross it off your list.”

“It’s perfect.”

“Good, but I’m not done yet,” he said, moving across the room to the paper bags from a local grocery store. “What fake theater would be complete without popcorn? I got the unsalted kind from the organic section and popped it at home. It’s probably going to taste like shit, but at least you’ll be able to eat it. Also, I got you M&M’s and pudding, of course.”

He brought over a huge bag and upended it on the bed, causing me to laugh. Pre-popped popcorn in plastic bags as well as large bags of M&M’s—both plain and peanut—and lots of pudding came tumbling out.

“You’re crazy,” I said.

“I’ve heard that a lot today. So, what do you want to watch, angel?”

He jogged back over to the black bag that had held the projector and removed a sleek black laptop. A little hospital logo was affixed to the top. Apparently, the favor in HR also included a laptop.

“I don’t know. What are my selections?”

“Well, I took the liberty of asking Grace what your favorites were, and she volunteered to bring in several during her lunch break,” he said, pulling out a case filled with DVDs. “She also threw in a few extras. Pick whatever you want.”

I opened the leather case stuffed full of DVDs, and I wasn’t surprised to see that Grace had shoved Frozen in the first plastic slot. I snorted and moved on, overwhelmed by Grace’s generosity. She’d managed to gather up all my well-known favorites like Ferris Bueller’s Day Off and Dirty Dancing as well as others I’d been dying to see but hadn’t managed to see just yet.