Waiting On You (Blue Heron #3)(117)

There was probably no better person on earth than Paulie Petrosinsky, and Colleen’s eyes filled with tears.

“Thanks.” The chicken was horrifyingly good. She chewed and swallowed, watching Arnold’s motorcycle outrun the 18-wheeler.

“I’m sorry I made a scene,” Paulie said. “It’s just...embarrassing. Like I could be with Bryce when he could get someone like you. I was shocked.”

“Paulie, you’re ten times better than I am.”

“Yeah, right. Look in the mirror, Colleen.”

“Looks are meaningless.”

Paulie snorted. “Right. If I looked like you, Bryce would be climbing me like a tree.”

“My looks have gotten me nowhere,” Colleen said. “I’m pretty, so what? I’m single, and I’ve had one meaningful relationship in my life, and everyone thinks I’m the town slut and I let them. In fact, I like them thinking that. It’s better than knowing I’m kind of a wreck. Whereas everyone takes one look at you and they know how decent you are.”

“Decent. A very decent virgin, so cry me a river,” Paulie said, taking another piece of chicken. “Have some more. This batter is made with crushed Frosted Flakes.”

“No wonder it’s so good,” Colleen said, taking another massive breast. “Paulie, I didn’t say anything about Bryce because it was a mistake. A one-time mistake.”

“Was it because you were mad at Lucas? Because it seems like a really shitty thing to do.”

Colleen swallowed. “No. It was because I was lonely. I loved him, and he was married, and I was still stuck.” She paused. “And really, really lonely.”

“I know that feeling.”

“Paulie, I’m so sorry it hurt you.”

The other woman sighed and flopped back on the bed. On-screen, the cool, newer terminator stuck his arm into a nurse, killing her. “Okay. I accept your apology, Coll. I mean, it sucks, picturing you beautiful people bumping uglies, but I appreciate you trying to get me with Bryce. I really do.”

“He misses you.”

“Whatever.”

“I mean, don’t give up hope.”

“I already have. Hope sucks.” Paulie sighed again. “Think Lucas will forgive you?”

“I can’t really picture that right now.” She lay on the bed, too. Paulie took her hand and squeezed it, then handed her the box of tissues.

She didn’t deserve a friend like Paulie. But man, she sure would like to.

“Paulie?” she whispered.

“Yeah?”

“I’m so sorry about sixth grade. I wish I’d done better by you.”

Paulie was quiet for a long minute. “Well, no one else had the guts. I mean, yeah, I hated you for a while. But I watched you. You’ve always been really nice.”

Colleen swallowed and wiped the tears that were trickling into her hair. “Thanks.”

“Now get off my bed and let me wallow. Shouldn’t you go talk to Lucas?”

“Oh, probably.”

“Then get out of here.” She sat up and handed Colleen another slab of chicken. “Take this for the road.”

* * *

IT TOOK ALL the courage she had to knock on Lucas’s door. Still, her hands were shaking. Legs, too. Throw heart on the list as well, because it was beating so fast it felt like a hummingbird’s wings, and Colleen wasn’t 100 percent sure she wasn’t about to faint.

The door opened. It wasn’t Lucas. It was Mercedes. “Hey, Colleen!” she said. “How’s it going?”

“Hi,” she said. “Is your uncle here?”

“Yeah. Hang on. Uncle Lucas!” she bellowed, making Colleen jump. “Your girlfriend is here!” She turned back to Colleen. “Sorry, but you guys are totally obvious.”

“Oh.”

Mercedes gave her a strange look—Weren’t you good at conversation once?—and then left, and there he was, filling the doorway with scalding vats of testosterone.

“Got a minute?” she whispered.

“No.”

“Please, Lucas.”

It actually felt like his eyes were burning her. He turned, said something to Stephanie, and stepped into the hall.

“Can we go somewhere more private?” she asked.

“No.”

Not a great start. Then again, he had reason to be furious.

He stood with his arms folded, looking at her, his face blank.

Colleen took a deep breath. “Okay, well, this is very awkward.” She started to gnaw on her thumbnail, then put her hand down. “Um...so yes, I did sleep with Bryce once. It didn’t mean anything.”

“It means something to me.”

“Right.” She took a shaky breath. “It was a long time ago, Lucas.”

“Does that excuse it?”

“No. I’m sorry,” she said. “I’m so sorry, Lucas. I wish to God I hadn’t done it, we both do, Bryce and I, and it really meant—”

“There are plenty of men to sleep with in this town, Colleen. From what you’ve told me, you know that very well.”

Her head jerked back. “Ouch.”

“I’m not judging you.”

“Really? Feels that way. I feel quite judged.”