Undone by Her Tender Touch (Pregnancy & Passion #4)(42)

Ashley reached over to take her hand and squeeze. “What are you going to say to him?”

Pippa emitted a harsh laugh that grated on her own ears. “I’m going to tell him I love him.”

Ashley blew out her breath. “You’re so much braver than I am. You always were.”

“Yeah, but you’re smarter, so we’re even,” Pippa muttered.

“Not true. Okay, so after you tell him you love him, what then?”

Pippa sighed. “Then nothing. He’ll do what he always does and I’ll walk away but this time it’ll be for good. I just feel like I have to give him this last chance. Or maybe it’s just me and I want one last chance. Either way, I need it to be final. I can’t continue this hot-and-cold thing we have going. My eyes were opened last night. I realized that he’s happy around other people. Just not me. And that hurt.”

“Oh, Pip,” Ashley said, her whole face a mask of sympathy. “I wish…”

“I do, too,” Pippa said. “But wishes aren’t real. Wishing is for fairy tales. Cam is no Prince Charming and I’m no princess living happily ever after.”

Ashley seemed to be on the verge of tears and the very last thing Pippa wanted was to further upset her friend. Not when she should be on top of the world. So she forced cheer into her voice and a smile onto her lips as she rose to hug Ashley.

“I’m going to steal that baby from Devon for a minute and then I’m going to get out of here and let you rest.”

She turned toward Devon, who slowly lifted his daughter away from his shoulder and placed her in Pippa’s arms.

She held the baby close, studying every inch of her softness. She touched the tuft of hair on top of Katelynn’s head, feeling the silky, delicate strands. Someone had affixed a tiny little bow just in front of her soft spot. Pink and girlie. So much like Ashley.

She ran her finger over the tiny fingertips and watched in fascination as they curled around Pippa’s own finger and made a tight fist.

She was instantly and completely won over, heart and soul. She was absolutely in love with this little girl. Who wouldn’t be? But then it had been the same when she’d seen her son on the sonogram monitor for the first time. Instant love. Unconditional. A bond that couldn’t be broken.

It hadn’t been the same for Cam. He hadn’t been able to leave fast enough.

She briefly closed her eyes and then lowered her head so she could brush her lips across Katelynn’s forehead. She inhaled the sweet baby scent and then brought the baby back over to where Ashley lay.

“She’s absolutely perfect, Ash. You did good.”

Ashley beamed and held out her arms to collect her daughter. Then she looked back up at Pippa.

“It’s going to be okay, Pippa.”

Pippa nodded because there was nothing else to do. She turned to offer Devon a wave. “I’ll see you guys later.”

“Call me if you need anything,” Devon said.

Pippa nodded and then walked out of the room, closing the door softly behind her. She checked her watch and stood there a long moment, simply leaning against the wall in the hallway.

There was no way she would sleep tonight. Not until she settled things with Cam. She had to get this over with before it ate her alive.

It would be a long trip on an already late night, and it meant dragging Cam out of his bed, but at the moment she didn’t care. One way or another, it would be settled tonight.

Nineteen

Convincing a cab driver to take her all the way to Greenwich had been next to impossible, and it was going to cost her a fortune to boot. The ride seemed interminable and traffic was heavy even at the late hour. By the time she reached Cam’s gate, it was past midnight. He might not even be there for all she knew, but she suspected he was. He’d retreated to Greenwich with increasing frequency lately.

They waited at the gate while the driver spoke through the intercom. It wasn’t Cam who answered. She was pretty certain it was John. A moment later, the gate swung open and the cab pulled up the driveway. He parked in front and she paid him and got out after telling him not to wait.

John opened the front door and came out to greet her, worry on his face.

“Is Cam home?” she asked quietly.

“He is. He retired an hour ago,” John replied as he ushered her inside.

“I need to see him. I’ll wait in his office.”

She didn’t give John a chance to argue. She simply turned and walked across the living room to the office. She didn’t bother turning on the lights. There was something soothing about the darkness.

She stopped by the window, staring out into the night, at the bright, star-filled sky. Fairy dust. A million wishes. She only needed one. Just one.

The door opened behind her. She closed her eyes for a brief moment and then turned to see Cam standing there in the dark.

“Pippa?”

There was concern and bewilderment in his voice. He took another step forward and then reached down to turn on a lamp that rested on the table by one of the armchairs.

She flinched at the sudden burst of light and turned away, not wanting him to see what she was sure was obvious on her face. But how could she hide it? How could she hide how devastated she was?

“What’s wrong, Pippa? What are you doing all the way out here at this time of night?”

She swallowed, squared her shoulders and then took a deep breath. She turned to face him fully, uncaring of what he’d see.