Savage Awakening (Alpha Pack #2)(63)

"Tests suggest ongoing sexual abuse. But you're physically healed now," Mac emphasized. "As for mentally, you're going to be all right. We'll get you there."

"You guys keep saying that, like I'm ever going to be normal again." His laugh was painful, on edge.

"You will be. You are normal-"

He cut Melina off. "I'll never be anything but f**ked up!" His voice rose to a shout and he bolted upright, yanking at his IV. "Why bother with all of this? I'm ugly, tainted inside and out! What the f**k does anything matter?"

"Micah, calm down," Melina ordered. She and Mac grabbed his arms, and Rowan pushed his chest, pinning him to the bed.

"Micah, stop!"

"Fuck you!" he screamed. "Let go of me!"

"Noah," Melina called. "Reach in my right pocket and get that sedative into his IV."

The wide-eyed nurse leapt forward to do as the boss said, retrieving the syringe while the three of them struggled to hold Micah still. Noah hustled to grab the spout attached to the IV tube, yanked the cap off with his teeth, and inserted the needle into the tiny hole. Clear liquid flowed into the line and by the time the last of the medicine went in, Micah's struggles were already becoming weaker. One minute max, and he slumped, eyelids drooping.

"No. Please..." Then drifted closed.

He was out. They released him and Rowan studied her brother, overwhelming love and grief clogging her throat. His entire body was lax, his torment washed away, albeit temporarily, by a drug-induced sleep.

This wasn't fair. To Micah, to the missing ones who might still be suffering. None of it. Her brother was such a good man. He didn't deserve this.

Turning, she fled the room. Outside, she leaned against the wall and slapped a hand over her mouth, fighting to win the battle over the tears threatening to spill. She succeeded, but it was a near thing.

The trio inside filed out, and Melina spoke softly to the nurse. He hurried away, and the two women faced her, prepared to give their best rah-rah speech. Rowan wasn't in the mood to listen, but she did, anyway. Micah's welfare was at stake.

"You know he's going to be all right," Mac said. "We won't accept anything less than his full recovery."

"I know, and I appreciate that. But you saw him in there-the only reason he didn't shift again was probably because of the drugs."

"Maybe so, but honestly, he handled the conversation better than I expected. Don't you think?" she asked Melina.

"I agree. It could've been much worse."

"I don't see how, so I'll have to trust you both." She sighed, regaining some control of her raging emotions. "What happens now? Will you continue the sedatives?"

"In low doses," Melina answered, "just to keep him calm and suppress his ability to shift until he's mentally stable. We'll wean him off as he shows real progress in his recovery. And before you ask, there's no telling how long that could be. Months would be my professional guess, but that's a shot in the dark."

"Months. God, I have to go back to L.A. soon. How can I leave him like this?"

"He'll be fine," Mac assured her. "He's got the whole team plus a bunch of staff looking out for him. The guys are in and out of here day and night checking on him, and when they find out he's really awake, he'll have tons of company. He won't be left alone for extended periods of time, I promise."

Damn, having to go was eating her up inside. And if she was honest, not just because of having to leave Micah.

Don't go there.

"Then I guess I'll have to hang on to that until I can get back here to see him."

"When will you go?" Mac asked.

"In a couple of days. I took some vacation time in addition to my mandatory leave from the force, and it's almost gone." Belatedly, she realized they might not have heard why she was on leave from the LAPD. Then again, she hadn't exactly kept it quiet and they didn't ask for the story, so maybe word had gotten around.

"Make sure to say good-bye to us before you leave," Melina said. "That way we can keep an extra close watch on your brother, make certain he's handling your departure. I think he will, but it's only a precaution."

"I'll stop by, no worries. Thanks for all you're doing for him..." Damn it, she wouldn't lose it. "Anyway, I'll be back later."

The walls were closing in. She had to get outside for a bit, and didn't want to run into anyone. Not until she had herself under control. She exited through a side door and started walking, making sure to stay close to the building. If she was violating Nick's "group of four" rule, well, he wasn't her boss. It wasn't like she could get fired.

Heading toward the back, she found herself standing at the edge of what Aric had said was the ball field. The grass was somewhat trampled, evidence that they weren't all work and no play. Would Micah be well enough one day soon to join them in a game?

The thought of all he had to overcome was overwhelming to her; she couldn't fathom how he must be feeling. Spinning around, she planned to head into the building again-and ran straight into a solid wall of muscle. A pair of hands steadied her, engulfing her shoulders, and she looked up, half-expecting to see Aric. Only this man was far too big and tall to be her lover.