Hold Me (Fool's Gold #16)(94)

Jo shifted from foot to foot. “Yeah, well, about that. I might have made a few phone calls. I wanted to make a little trouble, but I didn’t anticipate how seriously my friends would take my concerns.”

“You didn’t mean to shut me down?”

“Hell, no. I was going to talk to you. Jo’s does a good business, but I’m tired of working sixteen-hour days. I have a hot husband at home I’d like to spend more time with. I’m going to call off the ladies. Your partners will come slinking back. Jo’s Bar is going to be open five days a week and close at seven in the evening. You can have the nights.”

She held out her hand. He shook it. “Remind me never to go up against you again,” he said.

“You got that right. Tell Nick to expect a crowd tonight. I’m going to make some calls.”

* * *

DESTINY CROSSED THE shallow stream. On the other side, she confirmed the GPS signal was still strong. While she enjoyed a day hike as much as the next person, she didn’t want to have to retrace her steps.

She paused for a drink of water. Tall trees offered shade overhead and kept the temperature comfortable, but she was in her third hour of hiking and getting a little tired.

She was out of shape, she thought. She hadn’t been exercising as regularly. That was going to have to change. She had to stay healthy for two. Something she couldn’t mention to Kipling, she thought with a smile. Before she finished speaking, he would have designed a program and signed her up with a trainer.

No, he wouldn’t, she thought, her smile fading. Because they weren’t together anymore. She’d ended things pretty abruptly, and she hadn’t heard from him since.

She missed him, she admitted. A lot. There was a hole in her life and maybe in her heart. A Kipling-size one. She missed how he visibly brightened when she walked in the room. How he listened and then offered advice whether she wanted it or not. She liked how easily he’d adjusted to being a mere mortal after years spent being a ski god.

He was a good man, she thought wistfully. Funny, charming, caring. Instead of getting mad when he’d found out she’d been a virgin, he’d wanted to help her learn to enjoy sex. He was dependable and caring. If only he loved her. Because without loving her, without her being able to—

Destiny stopped in midstride. She slowly lowered her raised foot to the ground and let the swirling thoughts settle. When they did, she nearly fell over from shock.

She was still doing it. She was still running from something—just like she always had. She’d run from her parents when she’d been younger. She’d run from her emotions, her passions, her talents. She’d built up walls and hidden behind them, and she was still doing it. Right this second.

How did she know Kipling didn’t love her? She hadn’t asked. She hadn’t given him a chance to talk or explain or even think. They’d never talked about their marriage or explored what either of them expected or needed to make the relationship work. She’d simply told him she wanted a divorce.

Running away from something wasn’t the same as running to something. She’d spent so much of her life thinking about what she didn’t want that she’d forgotten to figure out what was important to her. She was so worried about being unhappy that she never bothered to find what made her happy. Or who.

She loved Kipling. She knew that for sure. But did he love her? Maybe this was a good time to be asking that question. And not just of herself.

“What have I done?” she asked out loud.

There was no answer. Just the hum of insects and the call of a hawk.

She glanced down at her screen. Her exact location showed as a tiny dot. She could see the most direct route back to her car and immediately headed that way.

* * *

MEN HAD BEEN making fools of themselves over women for centuries, Kipling thought cheerfully. He was just one in a long line. If he was going to lose Destiny, he was going to do it in style. With everything on the table.

In the past hour he’d had a call from five of his business partners asking to be a part of The Man Cave again, and a text from Nick saying he was expecting a big crowd. Felicia Boylan, Carter’s mother, had found him and hugged him, all the while telling him how happy she was that he’d shown Carter the complete cycle of a male exchange, from misunderstanding to threatened violence, to apology and resolution. When he’d tried to explain that hadn’t been his intent, she’d brushed off his comments.

He stood there, in the center of the festival, surrounded by people, and all he could think was that he wanted to tell Destiny all about it. Not just tell her, but have her share in it. He wanted to laugh with her and touch her and take care of her.

But the telling was important, too. Talking to her. Words. It came back to those damn words.

He got that actions were significant. Promising to be faithful was meaningless if you went out and cheated. His father hitting Shelby had a whole lot more meaning than the times he’d sworn he loved her. But maybe, just maybe, he’d taken the lesson he’d learned just a little too far. Maybe he’d dismissed the words too quickly. And if that were the case, he just might have a chance at winning Destiny back.

In the time it took him to jog home and grab the keys to his Jeep, he came to several more realizations. He realized that just because he’d never been in love before didn’t mean he was necessarily flawed. He hadn’t been holding back because he didn’t believe saying he loved someone made a difference—he’d been waiting. For the right woman. The only woman.