Forever My Love (Berkeley-Faulkner #2)(37)

Walking over to a nearby window, he leaned against the sill and stared out at the darkening sky.

It had all gone with Holt. Honestly he acknowledged to himself that he was not the same man he had been before Holt’s death. There were so many things he didn’t care about anymore, so many things that had to be done before his wounds could heal, before he could allow himself to forget. There had been only one small promise of comfort, one chance at happiness… but that had been only an illusion.

“Oh, damn,” Alec whispered quietly, his troubled musings interrupted by the sight of a small figure outside, a long distance away. A woman was running across the small bridge that led to an odd little pagoda on the far end of the garden. She was too far away for him to see her face clearly but Alec knew that it was Mira. It had to be. She had a long dark braid of hair and was wearing a sapphire-colored dress, and even from here he recognized the trim curves of her figure.What was she up to? he wondered, inclining his head to watch her. In her rush she fell to her hands and knees. Then Mira picked herself up and continued on her frantic pace to the pagoda. It looked as though she were being chased. More games? Or had someone actually hurt her? Swearing under his breath, Alec stood up and looked down the hall to the gathering crowd in the eating room.

She’s not mine, he thought with a scowl. Let Sackville see to her if she needed someone.

“Lord Falkner, are you waiting for someone?” a feminine voice intruded on his thoughts. The Earl and Countess of Shrewsbury stood before him with pleasant expressions, and Alex pasted a thin smile on his face.

“I’m afraid so.”

“If you would like to accompany us to supper…”

“Thank you, your offer is most kind,” he replied amiably, “but I believe I will wait a few more minutes.” He exchanged smiles with the pair. After they left, Alec drummed his fingers impatiently on the win-dowsill and cast another glance outside. Mira had disappeared from sight. There was no one else outside, not Sackville or any of the other guests. “Bloody hell,” he muttered, “I’m not going out there… I won’t, not if I have any damned sense at all.”

Chapter Five

Curled up in the corner of the pagoda, Mira closed her eyes against the sight of the shuttered walls. She had been running all of her life with no destination and no hope of refuge, running without tiring because she had never known any other way of life. Until now. Now she was too exhausted to run any longer. Defeated, she made a feeble attempt to gather her thoughts together but lacked the strength to make decisions.

The sight of her reminded Alec of a hunted fox that had dug deep into the ground for refuge. He had not been able to stop himself from coming to find her; she had become an obsession of his, a temptation beyond measure. As he looked at her, he could see that someone or something had frightened her, and he was filled with the self-mocking awareness that he wanted to take her in his arms, shelter her from harm. Fighting against a surge of tenderness, he hardened his expression into one of cool indifference.

“Well, now…” he said softly, leaving the tiny door open to admit the dusky glow of twilight into the pagoda. “I thought it was you I saw out here. What for—a pre-supper tryst?”

Her quiet sobbing stopped abruptly. “Get out of here,” she said, her voice fringed with a betraying tremor.

Alec sat down across from her, his legs stretched out so that his feet rested on the cushion next to her. Mira cast his boots a venomous glance before lifting a handkerchief to her nose, blowing loudly, and then resting her forehead on her bent knees.

“What happened?”

“Nothing.” She refused to look at him. “Oh God, I don’t want to talk to you! Out of pity, please go! I can’t bear your company right now, and I don’t know why you’re here, but—”

“Don’t you? Perhaps I’m giving rein to my irrepressible curiosity. Or maybe I’m playing Good Samaritan.”

“Samaritan?” Mira repeated, suddenly choking on a combination of amusement and disdain. “You? That’s ridiculous. I’ve never met anyone more unsuited to that role. You can be kind when you want to be, but that isn’t nearly often enough. And even if you could help me, I wouldn’t let you… no, because you’d want something back. Your kind always wants something in return for what—”

“Easy, easy…”he said, holding up his hands in a gesture of surrender. “I didn’t come out here to serve as a target. I only wanted to see what the weather outside was like. I thought I saw a few storm clouds gathering.”

“I couldn’t tell you anything,” she said, undistracted by his teasing. “You wouldn’t understand any of it!”

“I understand about being in trouble.” Alec settled back against the cushions and regarded her steadily. “I’ve had a long and sometimes profitable acquaintance with trouble. I’ve had vast experience at pulling myself out of scrapes… hopeless messes, most of them, and occasionally I’ve learned a thing or two about… perspective.”

“I couldn’t begin to explain it to you.”

“Why? Do you think you’d shock me?”

Strangely, it was the mocking tone of his voice that caused Mira to consider telling him. Lifting her head to look at him, she expelled a tight breath. He waslittle more than a large shadow inside the pagoda, looking vaguely satanic in the darkness. No, she did not think that she could shock him, for if there was one thing that she did know about Alec, it was that he was not shocked easily. In some ways he was one of the most cynical men she had ever met.