Fools Rush in(90)

“Hi, everyone,” I said. Sam was leaning against the fridge, nursing a beer.

“Hey, kiddo,” he said, leaning over and giving me a one-armed hug. “How’s it going?”

“Fine, fine,” I said, quickly extracting myself.

How many times had Sam hugged me in my life? A hundred? Two hundred? More? And now suddenly my mouth was dry, my stomach fluttered and my cheeks grew hot. I scurried across the kitchen and hugged my nephew.

“How are you, tall one?” I asked, grateful to be with someone for whom my emotions were still pure.

“Good, Aunt Mil. Hey, sorry to hear about you breaking up with Joe. He was nice.” Danny gave me a sympathetic grin.

“Thanks, honey.”

“Hey, Mil, remember that, um, project you said you’d help me with?” Danny asked in a low voice.

“The midwestern project?” I murmured back.

“Yup. Got any time this week?”

“Sure. Want to come over one day after school? How about Thursday, around four? You can stay for supper.”

“Great. Thanks.”

Sam was watching us, a smile crinkling his eyes. An almost painful tightness wrapped my heart. Get used to it, I admonished myself.

Dinner was fine, I was fine. I told everyone about my arrangements with Dr. Whitaker, and they were thrilled. We talked about Danny’s school year. Dad talked about work. Mom talked about the upcoming local elections. I acted normally throughout, and it wasn’t actually too hard. I just couldn’t look at Sam for more than a second without that ache coming back, my throat tightening up and my hands shaking. Otherwise, no problem.

“Well, I’ve got to go,” I said the second I thought I could make a run for it.

“Let me make you up a plate, Millie,” my mom said, leaping for her Tupperware.

“Oh, no, that’s okay, Mom. It was fantastic, but, um, no thanks. Send it home with Danny and Sam.”

I kissed my parents and waved to Danny. “Bye, Sam,” I said, grabbing my purse.

“I’ll walk you out,” Sam said, rising

“No, no, that’s okay.” Heat rushed to my face as I fumbled for my coat.

“Don’t be silly.” Sam caught up to me in the hall and put his arm around my shoulders, his familiar height so unbearably dear to me that I almost cried. Mutely, I let him escort me down the walk and to my car. My heart thudded in my chest, and I seemed to have forgotten how to take a breath.

Sam leaned against my car door, blocking access to the escape pod. “Everything okay, Millie?” he asked.

“Yes! Everything is great!” I exclaimed, looking skyward.

He squinted at me, cop-like. “You’re acting strange.”

“Really?”

“Is it breaking up with Joe?” he asked. “Because I know you guys were pretty tight this summer. It must be tough.”

“You have no idea,” I said. “Literally no idea.”

“Well, why don’t we go out for a bite some night and you can tell me about it?”

“Um, sure, Sam. That would be terrific. Listen, I have to go now, though, because, um, I have to call a patient back at nine o’clock, and—”

“Oh! Sorry, Millie. I’ll let you go.” Ever the gentleman, he opened my door for me. “I’ll call you this week, okay?”

“Bye!” I stretched my mouth into a smile and nearly backed over his foot.

CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

A NEW CHAPTER OF MY LIFE was unfolding. Unfortunately, it wasn’t any better than the previous chapters. More pretending. More faking. And the fact that I was avoiding Sam, who’d been so good and kind to me for decades, killed me. I dodged his invitation when he called later in the week. Dinner together? How about if we drown me instead?

Danny was the bright spot. He came over with his Notre Dame application and we pored over it as if it were a missing book of the New Testament or the newest Harry Potter.

“‘What is the best book you’ve ever read and why?’ Brutal!” I said. “I guess we can’t say Goodnight Moon.”

“Why not?” Danny laughed. “You haven’t read that to me in about six months.”

“Don’t get me started. My baby nephew is going off to college. I’m going to bawl. Now what is the best book you’ve ever read?” I asked, getting up to give him more meat loaf.

“Hmm. I guess that would be The Iliad.”

“God! Mine is Bridget Jones’s Diary. Somehow, I think your choice is a better answer.”

We roughed out his essays, me murmuring encouragingly as he talked his way through the sections.

“Okay, what are you going to put down for your preliminary major?” I asked, going through the easier questions.

“Pre-med.”

I looked up, startled. “Really?”

“Yup. One of my favorite people is a doctor, and I want to be just like her when I grow up.” He smiled at me and started packing up his papers.

“Danny…” I said, my eyes wet, “you’re already ten times the person I’ll ever be.”

“Well,” he said modestly, looking so much like Sam it just about broke my heart. “We’ll see about that.”

He gave me a moment to blow my nose and dab my eyes, tolerated a kiss, and then shrugged into his jacket.