Through the Fire (Daughter of Fire, #1)(44)

“If you practice, you will eventually become accustomed to it. You might even find that you enjoy it.”

I wasn’t sure I wanted to persist, but I didn’t want to offend him by saying so. “Maybe,” I said instead. “But if this wasn’t a quarantine station, then what was it?”

“It was a refuge, for outcasts like . . .” he trailed off.

“Like me,” I finished for him.

“You are most certainly not an outcast,” he said quickly, giving me another gentle squeeze. “You belong in our court—everyone who has met you would agree with that sentiment.”

My heart tore in two. Despite being welcomed into his family, part of me was more alone than ever. The fae had welcomed me in every way, but I wasn’t one of them. No matter how hard I tried to fit in, I didn’t belong in their court. Then again, I didn’t belong anywhere else either.

I would always be an outcast.

An ache built at my temples and I rubbed my head to try to shift it.

“Years ago, this island was a refuge to hundreds of others. In the end though, it proved perilous to gather so many extraordinary beings in one place, out in the open for all to see. The hunters came one day and destroyed so many lives. They were unyielding in their attack until eventually all had perished or fled.”

“The Rain?” I guessed.

“You know of them?”

“You could say that.” I gave a mirthless chuckle.

“You’ve had a run-in with them?” he asked.

I nodded as the unwelcome vision of Clay’s brother behind the wheel of a Hummer came to haunt me.

“Then you are indeed most lucky to be standing here alive. Not many escape. The Rain is too ruthless and its followers too well-trained.”

“Tell me about it.” My mind turned over all of my firsthand experiences examples of that very fact.

“You will be safe with us . . . with me.”

I nodded and leaned my head against his chest. He was able to keep me safe. He could bring a smile to my face and laughter to my lips, even if he couldn’t quite make me happy right down to my core.

I wanted it to be enough.

Why couldn’t it be enough?

Turning to face him, I pushed thoughts of the Rain, of Clay, of everything else, out of my mind and brought my lips to his. It was the first time I’d initiated any physical contact with him, and I tried uselessly to convince myself that the gentle warmth in the pit of my stomach as our lips moved together was lust and not guilt.

The sound of his wings fluttering with a shiver told me he wasn’t exactly unaffected by my touch. The speed with which our clothes fell away should have proven that there was desire. The tenderness that he used as his fingers trailed paths across my skin should have been enough, but it couldn’t be. It wasn’t the sound of Clay’s loving whispers in my ears or his strong arms wrapping around me to hold me securely against his body, and that was truly what I wanted.




RE-DRESSED and lying among the debris on the roof of the school building, we enjoyed the sound of birdcalls all around as the sun crept toward the middle of the sky.

“We should probably consider heading back soon,” Aiden said.

I nodded against his chest before pulling myself into a seated position.

As Aiden helped me to my feet, my head spun. I clutched his arms tightly for support.

“Lynnie, are you all right?” he asked as he held me upright.

“I feel . . . strange.”

“Look at me,” he instructed.

I lifted my gaze to meet his, and suddenly everything came into greater focus. Instead of having to concentrate on his face through the wisps of blue light that had twisted around his body since my first taste of enchanted food, I could see his features with perfect clarity. The wings that I’d grown so accustomed to seeing on his back were conspicuously absent. As the strange sensation passed, it was as though a fog had been lifted from my mind. Aiden appeared like an average young man again—albeit an excessively attractive one.

“When did you last eat?” he asked. It was refreshing to see him without blue haze for once.

I shrugged. “Dinner, I guess?”

“I should have woken you earlier and ensured that you had some breakfast,” he said with a frown. The expression sat oddly on his features.

“I’m okay,” I said. My mind was clearing more with every passing second.

“Well, of course. Physically you are perfectly fine, but the enchantments are wearing off,” he said. “The fae world will no longer exist for you in a moment. I have got to get you back before that happens. Otherwise, you will be stranded here and might have to kayak back.”

“It’s okay,” I said. “Let’s just enjoy this beautiful day for a while longer. You can get me something later, and it’ll be okay, right?”

He seemed uncertain but eventually relented. I sat assessing the difference between seeing the world through fae enchantments and seeing the world normally. The fae world was much more bright and beautiful; the colors were richer in a greater array of shades, but somehow I could think clearer without it imposing itself into my mind.

Eventually, Aiden’s worry about me not having an enchantment any longer grew to the point where he insisted on heading back to the court. If I’d thought the sensation of Aiden flying me up to the rooftop was strange, it was nothing on him carrying me back down. At least on the way up, I’d still had some of the enchantment running through me and was able to experience his wings beating. With our descent, it was almost as if we were both falling to the ground, just incredibly slowly.