The Survivors(97)

‘Yeah. Well, we’ll see.’ George shivered in the crisp air. ‘I’ll get back inside. If Mia wants any of her books signed, tell her to shout out.’

‘Thanks. I’m not sure how much longer we’ll be around, though.’

‘Is that right? I hope not because of anything I’ve stirred up with the storm?’

‘No. Not just that anyway. It’s a few things.’

‘I can’t say I blame you. I really hoped I’d stay here long-term, but now –’ George looked tired. ‘I’m not so sure. Places like this, they need to be tight-knit to work. Once the trust is broken, they’re stuffed. Whether people see it or not, the writing’s on the wall.’ George turned back to his big house, with its torn-up grounds and its sprawling, empty feel. ‘Anyway, it was good to meet you both. Hopefully we’ll cross paths again.’

He raised a hand and Kieran watched him open the front door and disappear into the blazing light. The door closed and the street was dark and sleepy once more.

Kieran stood there alone with Audrey. The writer had gone, Ash’s car was not there, the road to the cliff path was empty. Except suddenly, something new snagged deep in Kieran’s mind.

No. Not new. Different. A dogged feeling that he was missing something tugged at him. Kieran stared into the night and forced himself to think. It was the same sensation he’d had earlier that day, down on the beach with Pendlebury. He closed his eyes and tried to focus, but the idea was like water, slipping through his fingers.

Finally, Audrey stirred and his mobile phone buzzed with a message from Mia. Kieran blinked and began to walk, the elusive thought creeping alongside him, always just out of reach. He chased it, without success, the whole way back.





Chapter 35


The house was quiet as Kieran and Mia let themselves in. Kieran heard the door to Finn’s room click shut again as they stepped into the hall, and he walked through to find Brian sitting alone on the back verandah.

Where once there would have been a cold beer in his hand, Brian instead held a glass of tap water, still fizzing a little with dissolved medication. He didn’t seem to mind, though, and was gazing peacefully out at the dark waves breaking white against the sand. The night air was crisp and the tide sounded strong and refreshed.

Kieran went in to get Audrey’s bottle and came back out to find Mia had pulled up a spare chair next to his dad. Brian had a cushion across his lap and Audrey lay on it, cradled in his arms. Kieran looked to Mia, who shrugged.

‘He wanted to hold her. He’s doing a good job.’

Kieran watched Brian stroke Audrey’s fine baby hair with his large palm. She reached for his thumb. Brian gazed down at her and smiled.

‘He’s strong,’ he said. ‘From the day he was born he was like this. A little champion. Aren’t you? My little mate.’

‘He thinks she’s you,’ Mia whispered.

‘Or Finn.’

She shook her head, smiling. ‘He said your name before. It’s you.’

Kieran looked at Mia as she turned back to his dad and daughter. He wasn’t sure if he believed her, but it didn’t really matter. He loved that she’d said it.

‘I’ll go and start dinner,’ he said at last.

‘I’ll go.’ Mia got up and gave him her seat. ‘You supervise this.’

Kieran pulled up the chair and sat down beside Brian and Audrey, listening to the sounds floating down the hall from the kitchen and the gentle wash of the tide.

‘I’m sorry,’ Kieran said quietly. ‘I’m sorry about what happened to Finn. I really hope you know that.’

Brian glanced up, then back down at Audrey, the faint smile on his face never changing. It was impossible to know if he understood. Kieran searched his milky eyes for any sign of lucidity, something more than a confused man lost to illness. He could see nothing.

Kieran opened his mouth to say more, then stopped. His dad looked happy. Relaxing in his family home, a cold drink of sorts on the table next to him, his granddaughter in his arms, listening to his beloved ocean.

Could this be enough? Kieran wondered. If this was all that was possible? If Brian didn’t remember what he thought Kieran had done, didn’t remember those black days when they lost Finn? If what had happened was gone forever, was that the same as forgiveness? Kieran wasn’t sure, but he thought about it, as they sat there together, looking out at the moon on the water.

After a while, the back door opened and Mia put her head out. She saw Audrey dozing again and dropped her voice to a whisper.

‘Dinner’s nearly ready.’

‘Thanks.’

Mia looked at Brian, who hadn’t even turned his head. ‘I guess we’ll offer him some? See if he’ll take it?’

‘Yeah.’ Kieran gave her a small smile. ‘He still seems quite out of it. He missed his perfect cue to blink to life and tell me that nothing that happened to Finn was my fault and he loves me and forgives me.’

‘That’s annoying.’ Mia trailed her fingers over Kieran’s hand as she moved past. ‘I still love you, for what it’s worth. And Audrey does, I’m pretty sure.’

‘Thank you. Me too.’ Kieran looked at her, leaning against the railing. The night sky was big behind her. ‘We should get married, Mia. You and me.’