The Gentleman's Guide to Vice and Virtue (Guide #1)(73)
Topher, Joey, Sam, and Mo unanimously went into a state of shock.
Apparently the Arizona Meteor Crater was only the second biggest impact of their day.
Chapter Twenty
HEROES AND HAPPINESS
The drive from the Arizona Meteor Crater to the Grand Canyon was the quietest the station wagon had been the whole trip—but not by special request. The Downers Grove gang were too stunned to speak. As if they had magically been transported into a snow globe, their whole world had been turned upside down and violently shaken apart, and they didn’t know where to begin picking up the pieces. The travelers didn’t know what to say, what to do, or what to think. The only guidance they had was their itinerary, so they followed it and hoped some reassurance would be waiting at their next stop.
Cash stayed quiet, too, but his silence inspired a thousand questions. Did the actor know his show was getting canceled or was it news to him as well? If he was aware, how long had he known? Was his behavior the reason the network had pulled the plug? Why would he join fans on a road trip if he knew this news was coming? The car was driven over a hundred miles before anyone was brave enough to voice the taunting questions aloud.
“Did you know?” Mo asked.
Her stern gaze was aimed directly at Cash but the actor never looked away from the Arizona desert outside his window.
“I knew I wasn’t returning for season ten,” he said softly. “But I had no idea they were going to cancel the show over it.”
“So you’ve been lying to us,” Joey said.
“I never lied about anything,” Cash said. “I just didn’t tell you the whole truth—there’s a difference.”
“Why are you leaving the show?” Sam asked.
“Because it’s just my time to go, okay?” he said. “God, I’ve spent all week telling you about what a nightmare it is—does it actually surprise you? Can you blame me for wanting it to end?”
“You should have told us,” Mo said. “You should have prepared us for this—this—”
“Disappointment?” Cash finished her sentence. “Well, I’m sorry to disappoint you. Actually, I don’t really give a shit. I’ve already disappointed the whole world—who cares if four more nerds are added to the list?”
“Cash, you knew how much the show meant to us,” Topher said. “You knew we’ve been watching it since we were in elementary school. And you knew the show was going to keep us connected when we went away to college. How can we not be disappointed right now?”
The actor slowly shook his head at the notion.
“Dumb ass,” Cash said under his breath.
“Excuse me?” Topher said.
“I’m not talking about you, I’m talking about me,” he said. “You see, for once I thought I had found people that might care about me more than the show I was on. For once I thought I may have found a group of friends, but I guess I was wrong. There are only two types of people someone like me gets to have in their life: fans and critics. I’m stupid for expecting anything else.”
“Now you’re just being a drama queen,” Mo said. “We can be your friends and fans of your show, too. As fans we’re heartbroken our favorite show is over, but as your friends we’re pissed off you didn’t tell us sooner. Seems like you’re the one who doesn’t know how to be a real friend.”
“So you’re saying if I told you on day one that I was leaving the show, we could have still had fun together?” he asked the car. “Because today is day six and you guys are acting like I’m a murderer. Face it, you guys are fans first. All you really care about is the show and the fantasy it provides you—that’s the only reason you put up with me this week. So don’t lecture me about real friendship.”
The others wanted to object but they couldn’t prove him wrong. Despite how close they’d become to Cash, maybe he wasn’t a real friend if their loyalties were still with Wiz Kids. After all, they’d only known the actor for less than a week, but they’d known his show for the majority of their lives.
“Don’t worry, I won’t be with you much longer,” Cash said. “As soon as this car stops I’ll happily leave the trip so you’re free to crucify and vilify me just like all the other Wizzers in the world right now.”
At seven o’clock on Friday evening, the station wagon pulled in to a lookout point on the edge of the Grand Canyon. Cash grabbed his things and hopped out of the car before it came to a complete stop. He stormed off into the forest beside the canyon without the slightest clue where he was going—he just wanted to get as far away as possible.
“Where do think you’re going?” Topher said.
The actor ignored him and continued through the trees. Topher ran after him and the others followed, but Cash was moving at such a determined pace it was difficult to keep up. The breathtaking sight of the Grand Canyon was just a few feet away but none of them were paying any attention to it.
“There’s nowhere to go for miles,” Topher tried again. “You’re going to get lost.”
“Like you give a fuck,” Cash said.
“What are you talking about?” Topher asked. “We’ve spent this whole trip giving fucks about you! When I carried you out of that warehouse, that was giving a fuck! When we delayed our plans to go to High Tydes, that was giving another fuck! When we stopped on the side of the road so you could drive a Porsche, that was giving a fuck, too! When we hid you from those tourists at the jailhouse, that was also giving a fuck! And now we’re chasing your ass through a forest because, guess what, we give a fuck!”