The Barbarian Before Christmas (Ice Planet Barbarians #17.5)(3)

Ash-tar bares his fangs at me, his eyes growing dark. Vuh-ron-ca squeezes his hand and gives me a funny look. “How do you think you’re going to get there without us? You need Ashtar, and he won’t go without me.”

“Bah. We do not need either of you.”

“We do if we wish to get there in a much shorter period of time,” Vektal corrects. He frowns at me as if I am making things worse with my protests. I do not care—all I can think about is my mate and how she has been alone all these long nights.

“I do not understand,” Aehako says slowly, leaning forward. “Do you two know of a secret path?”

The mated pair exchange a glance. “Something along those lines,” Vuh-ron-ca says. Vektal rubs his jaw and smirks, glancing over at me.

I do not trust this. Something is afoot. And yet… “How much quicker?” I ask, because this has my interest.

Vuh-ron-ca looks to her mate. Ash-tar thinks for a moment, and then says, “We can be over the mountains in a matter of hours. To your home in a day or so, provided the weather is clear.”

A day? I could be holding my Ell-ee by this time tomorrow night? “Whatever it is, I will do it,” I say quickly, before anyone can change their minds.

“I thought this might be so,” my chief says in a dry voice. “How many can you carry, Ash-tar?”

The golden male does not hesitate. “Four, along with my mate. We can judge future trips based off of this one.”

“Hold a moment…carry?” I sputter. I must misunderstand, because this makes no sense to me. The golden male wishes to carry us across the mountains?

“Carry,” Ash-tar agrees, and there is a smug look on his fanged face.

I am speechless…but it does not matter, because I am going home to my mate. If he said I must carry him on my back through the churning salt waters, I would, as long as Ell-ee would be waiting for me on the other side.





2





ELLY



The stars aren’t the same without Bek here at my side. Alone, they seem less bright, less welcoming. Then again, everything does. All the things that I took great joy in a few short weeks ago seem unable to bring me happiness anymore. Clear, starry nights are unexciting. Sunny, windy days hold no joy. The warmth of hot tea or the laughter of friends mean nothing. I thought that after I was free from cages and slavery that nothing in the world would bother me ever again…but I was wrong.

I miss Bek. I miss him so much that I hurt. I miss him so intensely that I want to just crawl into my furs and sleep and sleep and sleep until he returns. I know this isn’t healthy. I know that I should be strong and independent and spend my time helping out the others, like Gail and Stacy and Claire and all the other tribeswomen. Bek loves me. He is going to return. He promised.

But the waiting is so, so hard. Lately it seems harder than ever, because my stomach has been growing increasingly upset, and I want fresh, raw meat…but Bek is not here to take a bite of my food and make it safe for me. He is not here to wrap his body around my cold one at night and keep me warm, and I do not trust the others enough to share heat. I am not good at being alone. Not anymore. Not when I had a glimpse of what life is like as his mate.

I close my eyes and huddle in my blankets, dreaming of him. His proud, stern face. The smooth arch of his tall horns and the long, dark braids he ties back along his temples to keep his hair out of his eyes. I think of the way he feels when he nuzzles me early in the morning, his velvet-soft skin brushing against mine, his tail tickling along my thigh. He holds me so tenderly and caresses me, murmuring a morning greeting before kissing every inch of my skin and showing how much he missed me while he was asleep. My throat knots up just thinking about it and hot tears seep out between my lashes and crust into ice. I rub it away with my fingers.

I don’t even mind the cold when he’s here. When he’s not…well, I mind everything.

“Ell-ee,” a little voice bellows outside my hut. A small hand scratches at the privacy screen. “Wake up! It’s time to go catch dirtbeaks!”

Erevair. I haven’t forgotten about our little morning “date.” It’s just that some mornings it’s harder to crawl out of bed than others.

I pull myself from the blankets and put on my boots, then push my hair out of my face and go to the screen, pulling it back so my young visitor can enter.

“About time,” Erevair declares as he enters, and he sounds just like Claire. Behind him trails a little girl with a long, silky brown braid and pale blue skin. It’s Kae, Kira and Aehako’s daughter, and she’s as quiet as Erevair is noisy. “Have you eaten today, Elly?” Erevair moves next to my firepit and stirs the coals with my fire-stick. “It’s too cold in here. Bek wouldn’t like that.”

Kae squats next to Erevair, content to watch him putter around my house as if it’s his place. It’s rather amusing to watch him. It’s like he’s trying to make up for the fact that Bek is gone by taking care of me. It’s sweet, really.

“I ate,” I lie. I’m low on my rations that Bek has already “tasted” for me and I’m saving them. I can skip a few meals.

“You’re getting too skinny,” Erevair says. “Bek won’t like that.” He pulls out a pouch of cakes, takes a bite of one like he’s seen Bek do, and then offers it to me.