Secret Lucidity(69)

“What happened?”

“Nothing, which made it laughable. I don’t think he even noticed, but a few of us did, and it was pathetic.”

“She’s so gross,” I murmur and then pull out my earbuds to tune out the nauseating fodder for the rest of the drive.

When we arrive at the hotel, David hands out the room assignments and we head our separate ways. I’m with Ming and two other girls, who thankfully aren’t snide bitches like Taylor.

“Don’t listen to her. She’s just another washed-up mean girl,” they tell me, but I’ve already sluffed it off. Heats start in a couple hours, and I’ve been working too hard to beat my own state record to let someone like Taylor ruin it. Besides, her shit-talking just gave me more fuel for my drive. Never have I wanted to beat my own times more than what I do now, just to show Taylor that she’ll never be as fast as I am.

Catty?

Yes.

But I don’t care.

We spend the next couple hours hanging out as girls do and getting ready for the meet. When it’s time to go, we head out at the same time David comes out of his room, which is down the hall. It’s awkward to pretend to be so distant with him, and I find myself fidgeting as we all share an elevator down to the lobby.

When we get back on the bus, I opt for a seat in the front and as far away from Taylor as I can get. We arrive at the University of Oklahoma’s aquatic center, and I go into competition mode. David gets the heat sheets, and I take a spot on the bleachers next to the pool deck in our team’s designated spot. I have three qualifiers today: the fifty-yard, the one hundred-yard, and the team relay. While I wait for my heats, I pull up my music on my phone and shove my earbuds in, shutting out everything around me while I wait for David to call me to the deck when it’s nearing my time to swim.

For each heat, he gives me a solid pep-talk before stepping behind me when I take my position on the block. And each time, after out-swimming the other girls in my division, he’s right there, smiling down at me the same way my dad used to do when I’d break the water’s surface.

Taylor glares at me when she pulls herself out of the water, pissed that I’m Coach’s focus for state. But I’m the one that pulls the weight of our team relay, and I’m the one that has the best chance of coming out on top with the best times.

Evening falls, and the day wraps up. When everyone votes to order in room service, we head back to the hotel. Knowing that tomorrow’s swims are the ones that count, we call it an early night to get some solid sleep.

But, sleep fails me when I can’t stop thinking about David. I hate that I’m stuck sharing a bed with Ming when I want to be sharing a bed with him. I toss and turn, dozing in and out of superficial sleep. I grow restless as I watch the minutes turn into drifting hours on the way-too-bright clock on the nightstand. I lean up and look over to the girls in the other bed, and they’re sound asleep while Ming snores lightly beside me.

I lie back down and pull out my phone from under my pillow and give another look to ensure no one is awake before texting David.

Me: I can’t sleep.

He doesn’t make me wait long before my cell vibrates with his reply.

David: Me neither. Knowing you’re a few doors down has me restless.

I smile, knowing he’s feeling what I’m feeling.

Me: I don’t have to be a few doors down. Everyone in my room is sound asleep.

David: What if one of them were to wake up? You need to stay. It’s too risky.

I know he’s right.

Me: I hate this.

David: I do too, babe. Trust me, I wish I had you in bed with me right now.

The thought of being with him excites me. It’s the alluring temptation to touch the flame when it’s within reach, just to feel his heat next to me. I sit up and look at the girls as contemplation takes over, and even though he told me no, the rush in my veins is screaming yes.

I ease myself out of bed, slip on my flip-flops, and grab my phone and key card before padding out of the room, careful not to make a sound. Stepping out into the hall, I hold the latch of the door as I gently close it and then slowly retract the handle back.

My pulse races as I look to my left and right before rushing on my tiptoes down to David’s room. With a few soft knocks, he’s quick to open his door and pull me inside.

“What the fuck are you doing? Are you crazy?” he scolds in an audible hush.

But I ignore him, reaching my arms around his neck and kissing him. And no more words are spoken, because it’s in the moment our bodies touch that we fall victim to one another.

He presses his hands into the small of my back as we stumble across the room to the bed. Lying down, he pushes off me and stands at the foot of the bed. I watch him as he stares down at me, the moon casting him in silver. With his shirt already off, he lowers his shorts. I lift my hips and pull down my pants as he stands bold and naked in front of me. I then shift to my knees and remove my top. Exposed and entirely bare, we hold still, only inches apart, as our eyes fixate on each other.

He takes a slow step closer and reaches his hand to my face. I crane my head back and look up into all I will ever want, knowing this is my future—this—right here in front of me.

I lie back, and he crawls over me, our hands tracing over each other—touching, caressing, claiming the other as our own.

My heart beats into his palm as his lips spill over my breasts, and when he finds his home inside my body, I cling, arms and legs, to him, my plea for him to cover me wholly.