Neighborly(45)

“It’s all about informed consent,” Tennyson tells me. “You and Doug need to know this exists, and then you can decide whether you consent, as a couple. You’re either opting in as a couple or out as a couple.”

“If one of you is participating and the other isn’t, the nonparticipant has to consent as well.” This is, naturally, from Gina. “It’s a marital decision.”

“Those are the block rules.” Tennyson is trying to get the last tiny droplets of alcohol out of her glass. “But you need to develop your own rules, too, as a couple. And whatever you decide, you follow religiously. The biggest problems arise when a couple starts to break their own rules. That’s a betrayal of trust and a violation. That’s an affair, basically.”

“Why are we talking about such heavy stuff?” Raquel says. “You don’t start there. You start by looking around and seeing who catches your eye.”

Tennyson runs her finger lightly around the rim of her glass. “You flirt, and then you fantasize. You let your mind wander. It’s amazing what’s possible. Who’s possible.”

They’ve clearly misjudged their audience. I do everything I can to keep my mind under control.

Then we adjourn. The business is over, and it’s time to have fun. There’s general talk and laughter, but I’m too preoccupied with what I’ve heard to join in.

“I’ll get the next round,” I say, casting a quick glance at Andie, hoping she can read me as well as she claimed she could.

“I’ll help you carry them,” she says.

As we dodge people, I’m light-headed from the alcohol and the pitch I’m trying to digest. We belly up to the bar, and I hiss, “What the fuck was that?”

She laughs, and I can see the tension she’s releasing. “I figured this was coming at some point. I just never thought it would be this soon!”

“Did you think about telling me?”

“I felt like it wasn’t my secret to tell. Even though it’s kind of an open secret.”

“You and Nolan have opted out?” I ask, holding my breath for the answer and exhaling at her nod.

“They’ve refined their presentation since I first heard it. But when Gina said they were going to get to business, I knew what was coming.”

The bartender notices us and starts to walk over. I wave a hand to tell him he can take other people first, no rush here. “I’m definitely going to say no. It’s just a question of timing.”

“Don’t you want to talk to Doug first?”

“I’m not sure I need to. If one of us is opting out, we both are. That’s how it works, right?”

“You just might want to give it a little time. You’ve had a lot to drink, and it’s all sorts of overwhelming at first.”

Whose side is she on? Didn’t she just tell me she opted out?

“You need to do what’s right for you. And I’ll be here as a sounding board. Someone neutral. Because all the women are great, they really are, but they have an agenda.” She must see the alarm in my face because she adds, “Not a scary agenda or anything. I mean, they really will respect if you opt out, but they’re obviously hoping you’ll opt in.”

Does the person who’s writing the notes want me to opt in or out?

“The arrangement thrives on new blood, that’s all,” Andie says. “When someone new enters the mix, it shakes up the dynamics. There’s all this interest and rivalries. Block parties feel a little more exciting. It spices things up.” Again, she catches my expression. “In a harmless way, of course. They really are all good people. They truly are close, and they do take care of each other through any drama.”

“I don’t think I need any drama.”

“A little drama can be fun.” She smiles. Then she grows more serious. “I’m here for you, Kat. Opt in or out, it makes no difference to me.”

“I can’t believe they’re hitting me with this the second time we hang out.”

“Well, someone obviously took a quick liking to you and Doug.”

Of course. Doug.

The women find me trustworthy, and what they want is fresh meat. They want Doug. At the first girls’ night, they were feeling me out, talking about their sex lives to bait me, to see if Doug is available. Stupid me, I basically told them he was, seeing as I have no physical desire for my imminently desirable husband.

Some part of me must have known. That’s why I saw their faces when Doug and I were having sex. I knew they were competition then. Community of women, my ass. The spreadsheet needs fresh meat.

I feel my face heating up. I signal the bartender.

“So, you ready for a little dirt?” Andie asks.

“Tell me.”

She says that Oliver has been with men and women (I knew it!). Vic and Raquel were hot and heavy for a little while, and there were some threesomes with Tennyson. Bart’s always had a thing for Yolanda, but she turned him down. It’s a big secret who Yolanda has been with, but everyone knows that she and Wyatt have the most restrictions.

“Did you opt out from the beginning,” I ask, “or did you try it for a while?”

“For a very short while.” She’s clearly reticent to talk about her and Nolan, and I’m good with that. I don’t like thinking about Nolan in any sort of sexual context.