Happily Ever Awkward (The H.E.A. Files, #1)(66)

“We need to get you out of these shackles,” Paul said as he examined the iron cuffs around her wrists.

“Oh, I have a key, I grabbed it from his belt—” Laura started to say until she realized she did not, in fact, have the key. “Oh no! I must have dropped it when I fell off the platform.”

“It looks like someone else found it,” Paul said.

A rat clad in a black longcoat crawled up Princess Luscious’ gown, a brass key clamped in his whiskered mouth.

“Luscious, don’t move,” Laura said very calmly and quietly. “You’ve got something on you, but I will take care of it.”

“Oh, don’t worry,” the princess replied. “The rat is with me. We… I guess we look out for each other.”

Rupert the Rat perched on her shoulder and presented the key to Paul with a slight bow. Bowing right back, Paul took it. His task completed, and apparently feeling a little vulnerable out in the open, Rupert slipped away to always and forever guard the princess from afar.

Paul unlocked her shackles and dropped them at her feet.

“So… who are you, my prince?” Princess Luscious asked. The final spark of lightning faded from her eyes, and Paul at last came into focus.

“I am Paul, crowned Prince of Lilypine,” he said.

The princess’ eager expression flattened a bit. “Oh. Did they, uh, send any other Prince Charmings with you?”

“Only myself.”

“Oh.”

“My lady, do you have something to say?”

Princess Luscious sighed. This was always the hard part, even for a princess. “Yes. Now don’t take this the wrong way. Thank you for the rescue — I’m very flattered — but this isn’t really the Happily Ever After I’m looking for. I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry too,” Paul said. “Because this is the H.E.A. I want. I’ve wanted it my entire life.”

Laura dropped her eyes and backed away. It didn’t feel as if she should be present for this. She was surprised to realize she didn’t want to be there for it. She couldn’t bear to watch—

“I choose Laura,” Paul said.

“What?” said Laura.

“I told you I — wait. Her? You choose my handmaiden over me?!” Princess Luscious was suddenly mortified, a feeling she was not entirely familiar with. “You can’t!”

A dreamy smile softened Laura’s face. It had crept up on her unawares, and she was ashamed to have let it ambush her as it had. “You’re choosing me…” She was also ashamed to have said that, but it had slipped out before she could get her wall back up.

There.

Her wall was back up.

“Wait a minute, you’re choosing me? Choosing?! I’m not some prize you can just win, some prissy trophy like she is!”

“Prissy?! Laura, you dare speak to me thus?!” Princess Luscious hugged Paul’s arm. “My lord, defend your lady’s honor!”

“You said you didn’t want to be ‘my lady’,” Paul replied.

Princess Luscious laughed nervously, something else she was not accustomed to doing. “Perhaps… perhaps I was a bit hasty, my lord. Please reconsider. Surely you can see I am a worthy prize.”

Paul turned away from her. “I want you, Laura.”

The princess shoved past him so she could position herself directly in Laura’s face.

“How dare you steal my prince!” she said. “The ad was my idea! I was the one who nearly got sacrificed!”

That’s when Flicker finally settled Seeboth upon the platform. “You dropped something, my lord,” she said.

Princess Luscious ran to Seeboth’s side and threw her arms toward him. He flinched, expecting her to strike him, but instead she flung her arms around him.

“Fine!” she pouted. “You don’t want me, I’ll take him! What do you think about that?”

“I think he just tried to kill you,” Paul said.

“Keep out of this!” Seeboth snapped. He wasn’t sure what was happening, but he didn’t want to do anything that might jinx it — and being a Shadow Wizard, he knew all about jinxes and just how much damage they could do.

“That’s right!” Princess Luscious said. “You may be a prince, but he’s the most powerful wizard in the world.”

Enter the jinx. Seeboth cleared his throat uncomfortably.

“Actually, that’s not entirely true,” he said.

“What do you mean?” the princess asked.

“My power… it’s, uh… it’s gone, at the moment. It was all in the sword.”

Princess Luscious pulled away from him. “You mean you’re powerless? You can’t make us fly?” She stared significantly into his eyes. “You can’t transmute me anymore?”

“Not as such. No. But I love you—”

Princess Luscious threw up her arms in exasperation. “So does half the world! You’re going to have to do a little better than that!”

At that moment, Jack sauntered up the steps to the platform. Though he was sweaty and bruised, he wore a jaunty smile on his face and carried Captain Head’s cannonball head — without its body — tucked under his arm.

“Who woulda guessed, the thing just screwed right off.” Jack smirked and tapped the arrowhead imprint. “Not so tough without a crew or a body, are you? Now you’re just evidence.”