Drawn to You (Lover to Stepbrother)(34)

She hasn’t got the heart to sell the house so she and Xander agreed to rent it out. Another family is going to grow up here. The place my dad taught me everything. I grab my guitar from the garage and head to my room and sit on my bed.

I start to strum the strings and I feel once again that my body is breaking. I lost my dad and now I’m losing Colin. I will grow up seeing him turn into an amazing man and I will have to watch from the sidelines.

I will have to watch him follow his dreams, fall in love with someone else, get married, start a family. I press my hand to my heart and I feel like I’m in agony. My heart is literally breaking and I can’t do anything to stop it.

I start to play, tears never ending. I sing Kelly Clarkson ‘Behind These Hazel Eyes.’ I let the words seep into me. My soul is damaged and the only way I can heal is through music.

Music helped me get through my father’s death and now I need help to heal through a heartbreak. I shout out the words, my vision blurry but I don’t care. I listen to the words, linking them to how I feel.

I thought he was the one.

He was a part of me.

I am barely hanging on.

Each line I sing, I feel like I’m singing the song about me. I play it again a few more times. Waiting for the healing to begin.

I finish the song and my forehead rests on the guitar. “Daddy, I need you, more than ever.” I sob, hugging the guitar to me. I feel someone rub my back and I turn to see Karen. I place my head in her lap and cry into her.

“It’s going to be okay. I know it will,” she tells me, but right now I don’t see how.





Sasha


I look at my new room and sigh. It’s beautiful. All my things are already put away and everything is so clean and in place. I see my guitar laying on my bed and go over to it, holding it. It’s been a month since the meal and they get married in three days.

Three days.

Colin is now a stranger. He has started to act out, getting into fights.

The worse thing…

He is sleeping around again. He’s been caught having sex on the football field, on the bleachers, the shower room. I think that hurt me the most when I found out. I just feel numb now. I can’t cry anymore. There are no tears left.

I walk out of my room and I stop when I see Colin standing there in nothing but his boxer shorts. My mouth hangs open seeing his nearly naked body. I have seen his chest so many times but it seems more toned, more muscular.

My body starts screaming for him.

His eyes are trailing over me and he notices that I’m only wearing a long shirt that hardly covers me. He takes a step towards me and my back hits the wall. His eyes land on mine and I feel like I’m seeing my Colin. The boy I fell for. He raises his hand, about to touch me. My eyes close and soon I hear a door opening and a girl’s voice.

“Colin, you ready to go again?” My eyes open and I see Sissy standing there in nothing but her bra and panties and she smiles wickedly at me. Wonder what Nicole would think about this.

I look to Colin and his eyes have gone emotionless again. He steps away from me and grabs Sissy’s hand, pulling her back into his room, slamming the door behind him and I fall down to the floor.

I close my eyes and breathe through my nose.

I know deep down he misses me, I miss him every day, but this is how he’s coping. I can’t be angry.

We all deal in our own ways.

I head back into my room and sit on my bed and start writing out lyrics. Xander is building a recording studio in one of the rooms and I can’t wait until its ready. I need to focus on my music and that’s it.

I played for Xander and he loved my voice. The following day he had plans made to build a room where me and my band can rehearse and also record if we wanted to. He even offered to put my name out with some of his contacts but I declined, wanting to do it on my own.

I never told Karen since I know she would kick my ass for turning down such an offer. I want to see if we can get there on our merits though, not just through who we know.

The rest of the night I pour out my heart in a song.





Sasha


It’s the day of the wedding and I am standing there in a long lilac dress, my hair in waves flowing down my back. I look in the mirror and see the now black hair. I dyed it two days ago, wanting a change. Mom almost had a heart attack, saying I ruined my beautiful, mousy brown hair, but I told her due to all the changes, I needed a change myself.

“We are ready for you,” the wedding planner, a woman who looks about fifty, her hair already gray, says. She has been lovely and kind and gave my mom everything she wanted.

“I can’t believe I’m doing this again,” Mom says, sighing.

“You look beautiful.” She really does. She is wearing a long, white lace dress, hugging her perfect body.

“So do you. Thank you for being so understanding. You have been amazing.” I give her a weak smile. I hid my tears, my pain. Nothing can be done so why say something? It wouldn’t change anything. It would just make things weird.

“Let’s go get you married.” She squeals and I head to the door and when the wedding planner gives me the signal, I start to walk slowly down the aisle. I look straight forward and I gasp when my eyes land on Colin. He is standing right next to his dad.

My eyes are on him as I walk down. His jaw is set tight as his eyes bore into me. When I get to the front, I step to the side and when I look to him, his eyes are still on me. I look away when the marriage march comes on.