Atonement(5)
Afterwards, I set down before my vanity mirror and stared at myself closely. I was a very attractive young woman but I wasn’t beautiful. My skin was olive-toned from my mother’s side of the family tree and I had intriguing hazel-green eyes everyone bragged were my best asset. High cheekbones, a patrician nose and slightly full lips finished off the facial package but I also had great hair which was dark and an abundance of silky curls unless I flat-ironed them which I did at least once a week.
I was model tall at 5’9” which was an issue because it made me realize most men were my height or slightly shorter. It was a challenge finding men to date and most of the time when I did venture out with friends, I opted for flats as opposed to the flashy Christian Louboutin or Yves Saint Laurent heels because I would be taller than most men in the bars and clubs where we hung out.
I did a quick makeup job including a bit of concealer to hide the dark circles under my eyes, dark eyeliner and mascara, a bit of blush and nude lipstick which enhanced my dramatic eyes.
Satisfied with how I looked, I walked downstairs to find both Drew and Colin outside on the patio. They spoke and smoked animatedly; perhaps I should have stayed inside but I felt like having a bit of fun so I grabbed my wine glass and joined them moments later.
“Whoa! Look who got all dolled up,” Drew teased me. “Expecting company?”
“Nope, just Caitlyn. She said she would stop by after her last meeting of the day so I suppose we could wait for her before we began dinner.”
“That’ll work.” Drew stood. “Speaking of dinner, let me go check and make sure everything is okay.”
He handed me his cigarette before he rushed back inside and I stubbed it out in the nearby ashtray. After my father died, I had started up smoking again but I was trying to keep my intake low as I was determined to quit once and for all.
I looked up and met Colin’s gorgeous blue eyes which stared back at me with an intensity I usually found uncomfortable. I smiled before I inquired, “So, are you one of Drew’s bi-friends?”
“No,” he responded as his eyes continued to bore into mine. “I love women and although I see a lot of hot men in my line of work I have never been tempted to go there. We’re just friends and he decided to invite me over. I heard you’re planning on taking a vacation to Europe.”
“Well, I’m not sure yet,” I stalled in a voice I was unprepared to hear. “Your father suggested it after everything I’ve been through with the death of my dad and…”
Usually, I was very good at small talk. Although technically, I’d never had a real job besides professional college student, I did a lot of volunteer work at the local soup kitchen and homeless shelter for battered women. It was part of my job to break down barriers and get the women to talk about their feelings and discuss why they’d stayed in impossible and detrimental situations for so long before deciding to escape.
I found the work therapeutic, mostly because my home life had been so ordinary though my real mother had died at an early age. I still felt safe in the knowledge my father and step-mother loved me very much and I was luckier than most children thrust into a situation when one parent wasn’t their blood relative. I loved Jeanette and Caitlyn as if we were full-blooded relatives, and couldn’t imagine them not being in my life.
At the same time, I still needed an outside release and a relationship would do just the trick. However, due to my father’s death, finding a man wasn’t exactly priority number one. Drew was enough for the time being but now I’d met his friend, Colin, I wondered if I didn’t need more than what I was letting on?
“You were saying,” Colin began in a soft, even toned manner. “I do believe I agree with my dad—the good doctor that he is—and you do need to get away from it all. It’s never easy losing a parent. My mother died from bone cancer a couple years ago. You might find it hard to believe but my dad was useless in the situation. He really loved her and we’d already been through the whole breast cancer scare ten years previously. We just assumed she would be all right. Life is long and if someone had told me I’d lose my mom when I needed her most, I would have said they were lying.”
I tried to smile but my expression fell short. “It’s been really hard. I was young when my mother died and Jeanette raised me so I still, technically, have a mother and my sister but…my dad was my rock. He supported me in every endeavor even when my mom felt like he was spoiling my indulgences and I should face up to reality.”