Atonement(3)
“Good.” The doctor smiled at me before his eyes filled with a certain amount of pity. “Why don’t you talk about your real mother? You have never referred to anyone other than Jeanette since we have been seeing one another.”
“She died when I was three…a brain aneurysm. It was completely unexpected and my dad was really devastated. I don’t remember much about her except when I look at photos, I can see myself in her. Dad married Mom—Jeanette—when I was five and she was already pregnant with Caitlyn when it happened.
“I don’t know…you hear all these horror stories about evil stepmothers but Jeanette was nothing like that. She always treated Caitlyn and I the same and over the years, she became my mother. I know we aren’t related by blood but…I still feel so very close to her. I suppose now that my dad is gone too, she and Caitlyn are the only close family I have left.”
“What about grandparents?”
I shrugged my shoulders apathetically. “Well, my real mother’s parents’ are dead and my dad’s parents’ are back in France. I suppose I could visit them if I decide to do this European vacation. I haven’t seen them since the funeral and Grandma was really torn up about the whole thing. It wasn’t exactly the best time to bond with them. They have never cared for Jeanette and really liked my real mom so it was awkward to say the least.”
Doctor van der Meer jotted down a few more notes. “I think we have made excellent progress but at the same time, I really do believe this is the best thing you can do for yourself. You are a grown adult and with that title comes responsibilities. If you were nineteen, my attitude would be completely different but I am a firm believer in tough love and I truly do think you need some time for yourself.”
I chose not to argue with the good doctor and we spent the rest of my session discussing which countries I should visit and when would be a good time to buy my plane ticket.
By the time I arrived home, Drew was in the kitchen making dinner. My mother thought it was plain odd he’d also taken a hiatus and moved out to Seattle with me but then again most people didn’t understand our relationship. One didn’t stay best friends with a former lover, one moved on and decided to jump back on the horse again. That hadn’t been the case for us but then again, perhaps we weren’t ready to move on from each other.
He had a busy social life and always had a steady stream of boyfriends and girlfriends. Meanwhile, I had taken to living like a goddamn hermit and dated every now and then but there’d been no one special. I was human and when he was between partners, we did have a “friends with benefits” type of an arrangement though I insisted on condoms despite my being on the pill. It had nothing to do with me thinking he wasn’t safe but it did help me remember we weren’t exclusive and kept me from ever getting too comfortable with him again.
We lived in an ultra cool three-story townhouse in Fremont. Everything was brand new, from the stainless steel appliances to the hardwood floors throughout. Although it was a vast space for two slackers in their late twenties, we kept the third bedroom as an office-guest room and we each had massive bedrooms with our own en suite bathrooms, walk-in closets and a beautiful covered patio complete with furniture, and a built in overhead heater for cooler nights.
“How was your appointment?” he inquired as I sniffed and the aroma of garlic and oregano immediately seized my nostrils.
“The good doctor thinks I should get away for a while,” I said as I sat down at the kitchen table.
Drew turned off the stove and brought a bottle of Pinot Noir and two wine glasses to the table. “I hate to think I am agreeing with a shrink but it’s true. You’re much too young to spend your days cooped up in the house, Deirdre. You lost your father and that is a terrible tragedy but at the end of the day you are going to have to move on.”
I grabbed the bottle of wine and poured myself a glass before I drank half the contents in a generous swig. “That isn’t fair. Your parents are still alive to bitch and complain at you—”
“And they do…a lot. They have absolutely no idea why the hell I decided to accompany my ex out to Seattle when I could be freezing my ass off in Beacon Hill. They especially weren’t pleased when I told them we’d already bought a place together so my finances are tied up in real estate at the moment. My mother almost had a heart attack and wired me a couple mil to my bank account to ‘tide me over’.”
I laughed as did he and I realized he still had that effect on me. The curious look that could arise in those pale gray eyes of his and the way the light bounced off his sandy brown hair. Not to mention the man had the body of an Adonis and face of a god. He was beautiful, tall and athletic with skin the color of peaches and cream and perfect facial features thanks to his German-Irish background.