An Act of Persuasion(98)

Happily ever after.

He must have seen it that way in the movies and television a million times.

Only her eyes didn’t flutter and her hand didn’t move. The monitor continued to beep behind the bed and he was still lost without her.

Sitting in the chair he took her hand in both of his and rested his head on the bed. For the first time in his life he wept openly.

This is why I avoided love for so long. This is true sadness.

IT FELT LIKE being underwater. Anna, however, couldn’t fathom why she would be underwater. Now certainly wasn’t the time to go swimming. Her doctor warned her about her cervix dilating and the chlorine not being good for the baby.

Swimming was out. Had she fallen in the bathtub? Is that why moving seemed like such a struggle?

Wake up, she told herself. She was having a bad dream and she needed to wake up. But it felt like one of those dreams where even when you woke up, somehow you were still in another dream. Eventually if she kept pushing, she would get there. There had to be an end to all this dreaming somewhere.

Forcing her eyes open, Anna blinked and looked at the room around her. She wasn’t in a bathtub. She wasn’t in her room, either. Her bedroom with the pretty mint-green duvet she and Ben had picked out together.

No, the duvet wasn’t pretty anymore. She knew that but couldn’t remember why.

The steady beep behind her was annoying. Was it the alarm clock going off? She tried to lift her hand so she could turn it off, but her arm had suddenly gained a hundred pounds overnight.

Her whole body felt heavy and dull.

Because she was pregnant, she reminded herself.

No. Not pregnant anymore. A scene whipped through her memory. Ben holding her, screaming for someone to help. People in blue masks above her, running alongside the gurney she was on. Pushing her through doors, and then a clear mask descended on her face and everything after was a blur.

Until now.

Her baby. Where the hell was her baby? The beep behind her head was speeding up and Anna forced herself to move even though she felt a tight pain across her lower body. She needed help. She needed Ben. She’d lost her baby. He needed to help her find it.

Her mouth was dry and she tried to swallow. He would come. Ben wouldn’t leave her. Ben would never leave her. Even when she had thrown him out... Why had she done that?

Because she was scared. Too scared of what she felt for him.

But even when she’d done that he had come back. He wasn’t going to leave her. He’d said that, hadn’t he? He meant it. Ben always meant what he said.

“Ben.” It came out as a whisper. She needed to be louder. Her baby was missing and she had to get it. “Ben. Ben. Ben!”

The sound of something shifting along the floor had her turning her head. Ben was in the lounge chair. Sleeping. How could he be sleeping when their baby was missing?

“Ben!”

He was wearing scrubs but the sound of her voice jerked him awake.

She watched him bow his head. “Thank you, God. Thank you.”

Now he was praying? This wasn’t the time. She needed him and it was really starting to piss her off that he wasn’t paying attention. “Where is it? Where...”

Instantly he was by her side taking her hand. “Anna, calm down. You’re awake. You did it. I knew you would do it. Let me go get the doctor—”

“No! Where is it? Where is it?”

“It?” For a second, it was as if he couldn’t understand her. Was she making sense? Was she saying the right words? Then a smile broke out on his face and again she thought it was completely inappropriate to be smiling when their baby was missing. “Not it anymore. She. She is sleeping upstairs. She has already gained five ounces in two days. Apparently she has your appetite.”

She. Her baby girl. “Want her.”

“Yeah. I’ll make that happen. You rest and I’ll get the doctor. Then I’ll introduce you to your daughter. After that we’re going to name her. Finally. Baby girl just isn’t cutting it anymore.”

Weariness was pulling against her, but she fought it. She wouldn’t sleep until she saw her baby.

The delay was agonizing. First, the doctors came and flashed lights in her eyes. They pestered her with questions, which, fortunately, she seemed to have all the right answers to.

The words C-section and abruption and coma penetrated her brain, but she didn’t want to think about what they meant for her. She only wanted to see her baby. They told her she’d been asleep for two days. Two days! What kind of mother was she that she left her daughter alone for two days?