Within These Wicked Walls(61)

Kelela laid her hand on his cheek. “Look at me, Magnus.”

He took a deep, trembling breath, and opened his eyes. Lingered on her. Grinned. “Your hair really is pink this week.”

“Do you like it?” she asked, flicking her head like it would swish her hair, despite it being secured in a bun.

“It suits you. It’s been so long. Andromeda was right, you’re really beautiful.” His smile crept downward. “And I’m a monster.”

He got up and rushed toward the door, tripping to a stop in the doorway. “Protect her, Andromeda,” he said, a fearful anger in his voice.

“With my life,” I said without hesitation.

And he left the room.

“What now?” asked Kelela.

“Now you should rest,” I said. “Eat something. We’ll likely have to stay up all night, so save your strength.”

Kelela nodded and stood, looking at the fireplace. “Magnus was right, I’ve lost my mind.”

I didn’t know how to respond. The silence stretched between us. “You love him,” I said, to fill it. “And you’re a good person.”

Kelela laughed, and it almost wasn’t completely bitter. “You’re the only good person I’ve ever met.”

“We’re all sinners.”

“No, but you’re selfless. It’s hard to compete with someone so admirable.” She tucked her coat closer. Cleared her throat. “I can see why he loves you.”

Loves me? I forced myself not to gape, my brows lowering. “I want you to know, I don’t encourage him. And when he’s cleansed, I promise you’ll never see me again—”

“That won’t be necessary.” She let out a small, bitter chuckle, as if she couldn’t believe her own words. “I broke it off with him.”

I hesitated, forcing back my hope. “Why?”

“Because I saw you together yesterday. On the stairs.” She stroked the baby hairs at her temple. “He was so tender with you. He … isn’t normally like that.” She twitched, shifting uncomfortably, and I was glad she wasn’t looking at me so I wouldn’t feel badly for blushing so much. “The way he kissed you … the way he cried when you rejected him. I had to put the poor man out of his misery.”

Nothing I could think to say seemed right.

“He said you won’t have him,” she said, and when she turned to me her expression was accusing.

“It wouldn’t be right,” I said, and the words sounded idiotic even as they left my mouth.

“Even with no one in your way?” When I didn’t answer she kissed her teeth. “Let me guess, some excuse about being employed by him?”

“I don’t expect you to understand.”

“Whatever it is, it can’t be as big a deal as you’re making it. Do yourself a favor and get a little pleasure out of life while you can because we could all end up dead tonight—” At her own words her expression dropped to something more solemn, veiling fear. She cleared her throat. “You’d better keep your word and not get me killed. There are too many Parisian men I’ve yet to meet waiting for me.”

And she lifted her chin proudly and left the room.





CHAPTER 24


Whatever it is, it can’t be as big a deal as you’re making it.

Kelela’s words rang through my head, driving me crazy through the couple hours I spent constructing a better amulet for her. I mean, Magnus had led me on, knowing full well he was engaged and not thinking anything of it. Then, he’d had no intention of breaking it off with Kelela except that I’d given him no other choice. If I’d valued my dignity less, how long would he have kept us both?

But then …

Jember had been careless with my heart since I was five years old, and I’d yet to abandon him. And, well … perhaps the engagement had just been the whimsical words of children after all. It wasn’t as if he’d gone through the proper arrangements of paying a dowry—and honestly, they shouldn’t have been seeing each other before the wedding the way they did, if they were to do it properly. So maybe the engagement wasn’t official, and maybe I was the only one making a huge thing of it, and maybe he would’ve told me if it had mattered, and maybe—oh God, it felt crazy to hope—he did love me as Kelela said and I’d chased him away forever and …

And maybe it was too late to ask forgiveness.

I rushed out of my room, checking all the usual rooms until I stopped in the library doorway. It was darker and colder than usual. There were candles lit behind and around the chairs, big metal stands with branches like trees spreading out, with small holders for candles all along them. But the fireplace was nothing but a small flame, and only by the candlelight and the shadows he created did I see Magnus, kneeling in front of it.

I went in and knelt beside him. He didn’t look at me. Didn’t move.

“You’ll hurt your eyes,” I said after a moment, “staring at the flames like that.”

“I’m afraid the position of Nagging Mother has been filled.”

I bit back a laugh. Now wasn’t the time. Or maybe it was, and I’d missed the opportunity to brighten his mood.

I rolled my sleeves up to my elbows and crept forward, reaching into the hearth to get the fire live again.