The Crow King's Wife (The Elder Blood Chronicles #5)(46)
“And now you tell me that Fate has something grand in store for me and that I should be redeemed, but I have to object. I believe it’s something inside that makes a hero, Finn, and I don’t think I have it. Every choice I have ever made in life has been the darkest one. I am not the protector, I am the reason protection is needed. I have always been the villain, and I don’t think I have what it requires to be anything else. When I am pushed into a corner and forced into making a choice, my answer is written in blood.” Seth answered quietly and met Finn’s eyes once more. There was nothing but resignation on his face, and for the first time since Finn had met the man he looked defeated.
“So this is your surrender? This is you telling me you aren’t going to try for redemption anymore?” Finn pressed.
Seth swallowed heavily and nodded slowly. “This is me saying that I give. I have served here for so long that I know I will never be free. With the small taste of freedom you gave me I have lied, cheated, and killed. You gave me the opportunity to be more and I was too blind to see it. I wasted my chance and I don’t care to try again. I don’t even want to face the world anymore, and I think the world should find relief in that fact. The only thing I have ever given anyone is misery. I’d rather you grant me an existence like the rest of the demons. Give me some mindless patrol in the Darklands. I don’t want the position I have spent so long fighting for anymore. Give it to someone you can rely on.”
“Can I point something out before we continue down this path?” Finn asked with a raised eyebrow. Seth nodded without a trace of enthusiasm on his face. It was obvious the man had already had enough of his opinion, but Finn chose to ignore that fact. His next words were a gamble. They would either bring back Seth’s fire or destroy him. There wasn’t much room for middle ground with his current frame of mind. “I already knew the basics of everything you told me from the room Death made for you, and frankly the fact that you have been chosen as an apparent hero scares the hell out of me. Consider everything you have told me Seth and try to imagine what must be coming if you are the best one to face it? You are the oldest Immortal inside the barrier that I personally know, and rabid bears have more mercy than you. I can’t think of a single person that is more dangerous than you, not even Hemlock.”
Seth snorted with amusement at the bear analogy but remained silent otherwise. If he had found any concern over Finn’s words he didn’t show it. After a long silence he met Finn’s eyes and slouched further in his chair to stretch his long legs out beneath the table. “The problem with this line of thought is Heroes have to care, Finn, and I don’t.” Seth muttered, but there was a trace of bitterness in his voice that said he did care. He just didn’t trust his own actions enough to do anything.
Finn nodded once and let out a slow breath before leaning toward Seth and folding his hands in front of him. “You say you don’t have a conscience, and I say one was given to you. She had a beautiful smile and in her eyes you were nothing but a hero. You saved her life, and it scared you because you realized there was something you cared about other than yourself. You stumbled, and you don’t have the balls to ask her forgiveness. Let me point this out for you though Seth. Hemlock didn’t seek Yasny’s help just to make you miserable. He may hate you, but not enough to go to those lengths. He did it for a purpose, and I think it was to separate you from Zoey. Hemlock fears you. I’ve seen how fast he disappears when you show up. The only reason I can think that he would want you away from her is so he can kill her without worrying about you showing up.”
Seth’s eyes locked on him and the Assassin stiffened in his seat. His expression shifted from resignation to confusion then to anger in under a breath. “Why in the hell would he want Zoey dead?” he demanded.
“Good question. Can you think of another reason he would want you away from her?” Finn asked.
Seth frowned before nodding slowly. “She is Undrae. Hemlock is old enough to know what that is. If he can corrupt she would be a useful tool.”
“Either way you danced to his tune nicely and Zoey no longer has your protection.” Finn replied with a shrug and cocked his head at Seth. “So are you still waving the white flag or have you found a bit of motivation now?”
A look of pure frustration filled Seth’s eyes and he shook his head at Finn. “It doesn’t matter if I did find motivation. She won’t even give me the chance to apologize. At the first glimpse of black feathers she hides. Zoey hates me now, Finn.”
“Regardless of what you think I sincerely doubt Zoey hates you, but I will let the topic rest for now and give you time to think on it. We have a few more things to cover and then I have something to attend to.” Finn began as he felt a tug on his power. It was the second time in less than a breath, and he couldn’t ignore it much longer. It was a summons, but it wasn’t from the Divine, it was from someone much more important in his eyes. For her to summon him it had to be important, and as much as he wanted to save Seth he would drop anything for her. “First, you will make amends with Jala. She didn’t do anything wrong beyond having faith in her friend. You acted out of anger and you know it as well as I do. Second, you will visit Sanctuary on my behalf. I know the Aspects have a sort of truce with the Immortals to remain out of their affairs, but that is coming to an end. I want you to speak with Symphony on the matter. This is our world as much as theirs and I don’t approve of what they are doing with it. There will be a council amongst the High Lords next month and I fully intend for the Divine to have a seat on that council.”