The Crow King's Wife (The Elder Blood Chronicles #5)(51)
*
Jala opened the door silently and stepped into the shadowed room. She could see his outline at the window. He wasn’t sleeping, but then she really hadn’t expected him to be. Valor kept her hours for the most part, and had just as much trouble sleeping as she did.
“Did you wear yourself out enough to sleep?” He asked quietly, but didn’t turn to face her. He was sitting in one of the arm chairs with his feet propped on the window sill. A gentle breeze was causing the curtains to dance around him. She wasn’t sure if it was his magic or simply the weather outside. Valor was so subtle with his workings any more that even when she was standing beside him it was difficult to tell when he was using magic.
“Not really.” She admitted and at the sound of her voice he turned to face her. Even through the darkness she could see the concern on his handsome face. He could tell just by the tone of her voice that she had been crying. Jala tried to summon a reassuring smile as she moved to sit in the ledge of the window in front of him. “I spoke with Finn tonight.” She informed him as she pulled her legs up beneath her to sit cross-legged. The wind stirred her hair and she closed her eyes for a moment. It was definitely Valor’s magic. This late in the year the breezes of Merro were never that cool.
“And?” Valor asked quietly. There was hesitation in his voice and his expression had changed from concern to caution.
Jala let out a sigh as she watched and lowered her head to stare at the gardens below. “And I am a horrible person if that is the way you react. I’m so sorry, Valor. I haven’t been fair to you. I’ve been so wrapped up in my own mess of feelings that I never stopped to consider yours.” She pulled on her magic as she spoke and formed her memories of the conversation with Finn into a crystal. She set it down on the ledge beside her and looked to Valor once more. “That is everything that was said, and there are some things from that conversation that you should hear. I don’t want secrets between us, Valor. I learned my lesson on that already. “
Valor leaned forward in his seat and lifted the crystal, but his eyes never left her face. “You know I never blamed you right? I was content to wait as long as it took. Wounds like that don’t heal easily and despite what there is between us I knew it would take time.”
Nodding Jala smiled at him with genuine love. “I know, Val.” She assured him quietly. He never pushed her on anything, and his patience was seemingly endless. The only time he had ever raised his voice with her or argued a point was when he thought she was in danger. Every action he took in life was to protect her or attempt to make her happy.
He wrapped his fingers around the crystal and closed his eyes. She could see the muscles in his jaw clench, and knew just by that expression he was expecting the worst. Closing her eyes she leaned back against the window sill and turned her face toward the garden. The scent of lilacs was heavy on the air, and despite the tension in the room it was almost relaxing.
When the silence between them stretched far longer than it should have she opened her eyes once more and gazed down at him. He was turning the crystal slowly over in his hands, but at her movement he looked up. She held his gaze for a long moment trying to gauge his mood from his dark blue eyes, but it was hopeless. Valor was too much of a card player. When he wanted to hide his emotions no one could tell what he was thinking.
“So where do you suppose this leaves us?” he asked softly as he set the crystal gently back onto the ledge.
“One step closer to each other in my eyes. We’ve had a lot between us Valor. Neither of us has been happy, and both of us are carrying more guilt than we can manage. I needed to say goodbye to him. I needed to know why he lied to me, and I do still miss him, but I know you do too.” Jala answered quietly.
“Just hearing Finn say he approves of me beside you helped ease some of my guilt.” Valor admitted with a sigh.
“And I hope what I have planned for the rest of the day will eliminate most of the rest.” Jala said as she slid down from the window and moved closer to him. He watched her curiously until she settled quietly into his lap. His arm wrapped around her waist and she felt him relax beneath her. Still silent she rested her head against his shoulder and closed her eyes once more.
“Are you going to give me the slightest hint as to what you are talking about?” he asked after a long moment.
“We are going to Arovan today to return your sister to her family, and I’m going to tell Elijah about Dray. I’m not going as High Lady Merrodin. I’m going as Jala. I don’t want anything political being drawn into this. I just want to know I am doing the right thing, and ease both of our minds. We should have done both before now.” Jala whispered.
“Are you sure you want to tell him about Dray?” Valor asked doubtfully.
“I’m positive. They can choose to accept him or refuse him. That is their right, but Elijah deserves to know he has a grandson, and it will give him two choices for his new heir. Chastity or Dray, I want him to take the burden from you soon.” Jala answered and pushed off his chest enough to watch his face. “If you still see it as a burden that is.” She added hesitantly.
“I have no desire to be the heir of Arovan. My heart is in Merro.” Valor assured her and pulled her closer to him once more. “If that is one of the things standing between us than I will be looking forward to visiting my Uncle. I should be the one to talk to him about the heir though. If you say anything it will seem political.” He added and kissed her gently on the top of the head.