Indefinite (Salvation #6)(30)

His eyes drop to my lips. “Then we’ll start tomorrow. Tonight, I’m going to kiss you, so call me whatever you want.”

And, then, I no longer think about food because the only thing I’m hungry for is him.





15


Ashton





“Where is Quinn?” Mom asks as we’re sitting at the table.

“Hopefully, he’s running his way back home.”

She scoffs. “I hope not because your father is supposed to be with him.”

It’s just us this morning, my father and Quinn went for a run, apparently, he’s healed enough to need to show off to my father. On a freaking run. My fifty-seven-year-old father, who hasn’t run since he got out of the army, decided to do some good ole fashion PT with my navy SEAL ex-boyfriend. Like that doesn’t have disaster spelled across it with a capital D.

“You know Dad is probably going to have a heart attack today?”

She shakes her head. “He’ll be fine. He’s as strong as an ox.”

“He’s also as big as one.”

She laughs. “That’s how you keep a man, my darling. You feed him.”

“Then Daddy isn’t going anywhere.”

“Anyway, back to you and Quinn. Did you two talk last night?”

We talked and then we kissed. We kissed with so much passion that I was afraid I might die, but, man, I would’ve been okay with that as my exit plan. After his lips left mine, I pushed him away, remembering all the reasons it was a bad idea to be making out with him. He keeps getting the wrong impression.

I nod. “Sure.”

“Well, that doesn’t sound too promising.”

“It’s not. Now, when will Dad be back? I have some things to discuss with you both.”

Mom leans back in her chair. “I was trying to talk about Quinn.”

“Yes, and I was trying to avoid it.”

My mother pushes the plate of bagels closer. “Eat, and whenever your father gets back, we can talk more about our ideas.”

“I had one bagel already, Ma. I’m fine. But what do you mean your ideas?”

She shrugs. “It’s just a few things that Quinn mentioned and we think he has a good plan.”

I swear this woman is going to drive me to drink with her constant pushing. I know she wants me to be happy, and to her, that means marriage, but seriously, it’s not going to work with Quinn. You’d think by now, they’d know that I’m the last person to do this with. The harder she shoves me toward Quinn, the faster I’m going to run the other way. I’m built that way.

Then again, maybe this is the best thing they can do.

“Listen, Mom, I do have something I want to talk to you about before the guys get here . . .”

There’s no time like the present to get it out there. Not to mention it would finally get her to stop talking to me about him.

“Okay, sweetheart, what is it?”

“I’m going to have a baby.”

“What?” she screams and then breaks off into prayer. “Oh, Lord, please forgive my daughter for her sins. Please understand that we tried to raise her right, but this is all from my husband’s side.”

“Mom!” I call to her as I place my hand on her arm. “Stop. I’m not pregnant, I’m just telling you what my plans are.”

“You’re not pregnant?”

“No, but I’m going to get myself pregnant. I’m going to go through the clinic to have a baby.”

“Why would you do this? I don’t understand. What about Quinn? What about a husband? You’re going to just artificially stick it inside you?”

Oh my mother is so dense and yet so adorable. “I mean that I’m going to skip the husband and dating part and try to get pregnant on my own.”

“Ashton, honey.” She laughs softly. “You need a husband to have a baby.”

“No, Mom. I need a man. I don’t need to be married to him.”

She makes a cross sign and closes her eyes. “This is too much.”

I need to get her to see that there’s more to this. It’s about our family history not exactly being on my side. My hope is that she’ll understand at least that part. “Do you remember what you went through to have me?”

Her eyes lift to mine. “Of course I do.”

“And you remember how hard it was?”

“Ashton . . .”

“Understand that there are studies showing the fertility risks can be genetic. I have no idea why it was so hard or how you ever endured the number of miscarriages you did, not to mention the stress you put on your body to actually have me. It’s truly just a small testament to the mother you are. I might have the same complications. The older I get, the more issues I might face, and I can’t risk never being able to have a child. It would kill me, Ma.”

She shakes her head, but there’s a thread of understanding there. She lived it and somehow survived the suffering because, in the end, she got me. If I wait, I may not get the desired outcome.

“I don’t want you to be alone.”

I touch her hand, squeezing lightly. “I’m never alone. I always have you and Daddy.”

“Yes, but you know what I mean, sweetheart.”