How to Be a Bawse: A Guide to Conquering Life(7)
“THINK OF DISCOMFORT AS CURRENCY–IT’S THE PRICE YOU PAY TO LEARN SOME PRETTY CRUCIAL THINGS.
I walked into the building and instantly wanted to pass out. It was filled with gorgeous girls who didn’t seem to be nervous whatsoever. I smiled at one and she gave me the cold shoulder. Cue pee escaping body, round two!
I checked in, sat down, and took deep breaths. I didn’t get to see any of the script in advance, so I had to learn the entire thing at the audition. Also, minor detail, but I know nothing about this outer space franchise, so reading a script about galaxies with weird names only added to my stress. Is this the name of a main character or did someone sneeze? SEND HELP!
After I’d spent an hour memorizing difficult paragraphs, they called my name and I went into the torture chamb—I mean, audition room. I introduced myself and then the audition quickly began. I started reciting lines, only to mess up a few sentences in. Keep calm, Lilly! Damn, this was really hard, and my brain was racing. But I tried again. Within the space of a few minutes I did the scene twice, and the second time around I didn’t forget any of my lines. More importantly, I was still alive!
Afterward the casting agent and I had a great conversation and she told me she was really impressed with my performance. Was she lying? I DON’T CARE. The point is I did it! I DIDN’T SPONTANEOUSLY COMBUST AS IF HARRY POTTER WERE IN THE CORNER ALL LIKE “REDUCTO.” I walked out of that audition and felt amazing. Needless to say, I didn’t get the part. I mean, if I was part of a major movie franchise, would I be sitting here in this crappy rented apartment eating two-day-old pizza? No. The answer is no. (Actually … maybe.)
Wait. OMG! I get it, Nicki Minaj! There’s a gym in the jungle because it’s called a jungle gym. Holy crap, I’m a genius.
Back to my point. The next time I have a difficult audition I’m going to feel a tad better about it because of this experience. It’ll keep getting a little easier and a little less terrifying each time. To succeed at something, you have to step out of your comfort zone, inch by inch. Think of discomfort as currency—it’s the price you pay to learn some pretty crucial things. Besides, the goal isn’t always the trophy. The goal can also be the stepping-stones—the bronze and silver medals that bring you closer to the gold.
Remember, on the path to success, fear and discomfort are only speed bumps. Don’t make them dead ends.
May the gravity be with you. Wait, that’s how it goes, right?
Get Uncomfortable
What are three things you know you need to do in order to succeed, but find absolutely terrifying?
EMOTIONS ARE GREAT if you’re at a wedding, a funeral, or your kid’s graduation or while watching The Lion King. It’s a wonderful blessing to be in situations that evoke real emotion. Your baby girl is walking onstage looking like an adult, being handed her diploma, and you shed a tear. She’s all grown up now. Also, her tuition fees left you broke and now your TV is an iPod with a magnifying glass in front of it. It’s all so overwhelming and bittersweet. You should cry your heart out. But when you’re in a situation in which work needs to get done, put those emotions away. Emotions can cloud your judgment and reduce productivity. That’s not my opinion; it’s a fact. A fact that I made up just now, but it’s probably 100 percent scientifically accurate.
I’m not suggesting you be a heartless robot, but I am encouraging you to have selective emotions when tasks need to get done, especially in a group setting. Maybe there are ten valid reasons to be upset with your life right now, but in the middle of a shoot, with a crew of ten people who all have a job to get done, getting angry or offended will not help. It’s extremely difficult to do, but a Bawse understands the importance of having tunnel vision. Sometimes you have to block out distracting emotions in order to get things done, especially if other team members are relying on you.
I get a little (aka very) crazy when I’m in creation mode. I want to make magic, and when I’m calling the shots I practice a tunnel vision so intense that my peripherals couldn’t even sense a bird flying toward my head. It’s a blessing and a curse. Beaks are sharp. I have more ear piercings than I’d like.
When I was on the set of my music video “#LEH,” my friend and co-producer Humble and I were on the same page when it came to craziness. Like me, he’s very goal-oriented and believes that limiting your range of emotions will go a long way when you’re trying to complete a task. That’s why we work so well together. We both act like the Tin Man from The Wizard of Oz when we’re on set—no heart, all determination. The only difference is that we couldn’t care less about Dorothy unless she’s involved with our project. However, we understand that not everyone is like that.
Before we started shooting we had a meeting with the entire cast and crew in hopes of setting a certain tone on set. We made it very clear that we had a deadline and time was NOT on our side. We were trying to shoot an entire music video featuring a lot of moving parts—cars, extras, props, and several costume changes—in just a few hours. As a result, communication on set was going to be very blunt and to the point because we didn’t have time for pleasantries. We also made it clear that everything that happened while shooting, from a director yelling to a scene needing to be redone, would be for the benefit of the project. The completion of the project would be our only priority for the next few hours and no one had any other side agendas. If you got yelled at, it was because things needed to get done faster, for the good of the project, not because someone wanted to upset Kim. No one has “upset Kim” on their to-do list. So, Kim, don’t trip.