Dazed (Connections, #2.5)(38)

At 1:53 a.m. from Jagger:

I’m going to give you some time, but we’re by no means over.

Sitting alone in my car, I contemplate texting him back to tell him how much I miss him. But I promised myself I would get out of this relationship before I was in too deep and I know I need to stick to my promise.

The elevator door dings on the tenth floor and as I exit I realize how exhausted I am. Feeling preoccupied, I don’t even notice Shelly approaching me.

“Good morning, Ms. Daniels,” she says, stopping to look at me.

“Good morning, Shelly. Any messages?”

“Yes, a few.” She hands me the newspaper and a handful of pink colored rectangular pieces of paper.

“Thank you. Anything urgent?”

“Umm . . . I’m not sure. Are you okay?”

“Yes, why do you ask?” I manage a small smile.

“You’re wearing jeans. You never wear jeans to work.”

I shrug. “I didn’t feel like dressing up today.”

“Well, you look incredible as always. And I love your scarf,” she remarks.

I nod a thank you. With my head pounding, the lack of sleep quickly catching up with me, I hustle down the hallway so I can sit down. Through the open door, I see Kay packing up some boxes. She’s wearing a loose fitting canary yellow dress with matching shoes. Her hair is down and the color of her outfit makes it look even redder.

“Moving day?” I ask.

“Not quite, but soon. Damon tells me everything should be ready by the end of the day. Not that I haven’t enjoyed rooming with you,” she jokes, “but I’m ready to get my own place.”

I laugh. “I understand.”

“Oh, by the way, Jules got a call early this morning. Final screen tests are today. She’s on her way now. I’m just so excited for her. I really think she’s going to get the part. And she thinks her old boyfriend, you know the guy she was auditioning with yesterday, is a shoo-in for the lead as well. Maybe my little sis will find true love with him again.”

Setting my things on my desk, I blink at her without saying a word.

“Are you alright?” she asks.

“Yes, I just have a headache.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry. Do you want some Tylenol?”

“No, thanks. I’m good.”

“Well, I’m sneaking back over to the WB this morning. Want to come?”

“No, thank you. I have a lot of work to do.”

“Okay, I’ll be back shortly. I really think I should have held out for a job in Hollywood. I just love movie sets and movie stars,” she says with a wave of her hand.

I furrow my brows wondering for the first time why she took this job and if she’s planning on sticking around.

***

I spend the morning keeping busy with small easy tasks that, once complete, give me a sense of accomplishment. My hand keeps flitting to my neck—to the scarf he bought for me and the spot it covers that he marked as his own. I just can’t stop thinking about him. When I grab the newspaper, my messages fall out. I quickly look through them, stopping on the one from Madeline Grayson. It says, “She’d like to talk to you if you could give her a call.”

Without even thinking, I reach for the receiver and dial the number on the message slip.

“Oh, that was so much fun,” Kay says, slamming her purse on her desk as she enters the office.

I set my phone back in its cradle and calmly ask, “Did she get the part?”

With a smile she says, “Well, I don’t know for certain, but I’d say that director would be crazy not to cast her.”

Resentment runs through me, but it’s not her fault. I know I should have told her yesterday that I knew Jagger. Well know isn’t even the right word, that I was dating him—dated him? That I love him—loved him? I don’t know why I didn’t tell her anything.

Falling into her chair, she sighs. “Even auditioning with someone she didn’t know, she was so believable. It’s too bad her ex-boyfriend wasn’t there for the final casting. They would have been amazing both on and off screen. Oh, well.” She shrugs. “True love comes and true love goes. Isn’t that what they say?”

“I think so.” I swallow the bile down.

“Back to work,” she smiles.

My head is spinning. Why didn’t Jagger go to that audition? What does Madeline want? I push away from my desk and stand up. “Kay, I’m running out. If Damon asks where I am tell him I had some things to take care of out of the office.”

“He’s off somewhere with Ivy so don’t worry about him,” she says with a scowl.

I swear I hear her mutter “*” under her breath and wonder why she has a sudden dislike for him, but then again maybe she finally realized what he’s like. I shrug the thought off. “Call me if anything pressing comes up.”

She chews the tip of her pencil. “Of course. And, Aerie, if I were you I’d go home and get some rest. You really do look flushed.”

***

I decide to go see Madeleine in person, and drive up to her house at lightning speed, entering the neighborhood where my uncle used to live. Memories flood my mind of the times we spent together and again the tears that won’t stop flowing down my cheeks.

Drying my face, I grab my purse and walk up the driveway. I had heard Madeline and her husband divorced a few years ago and I also know that Levi hit the road earlier this year with his band. He’s running small circuits—clubs mostly, but doing okay from what I’ve heard.